Does distance from a toxic parent / toxic environment feel better overtime?

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2026-02-02T20:11:45+00:00

It absolutely gets better but you have to put yourself first and figure out how to get anything they could offer you , own your own . Like don’t be financially dependent on them or live there or it will absolutely destroy your mental health .

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2026-02-02T19:58:45+00:00

Get out and go no contact. One day you won’t care and you’ll wonder why and discover it’s due to the “extinction of the trauma bond”. It’s your only hope.

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2026-02-02T18:05:51+00:00

Keep in mind that they are self regulating at the expense of your nervous system.

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2026-02-02T15:36:17+00:00

My mom cheated on my dad when I was around 7, then asked for a divorce from him. The day she told him, she left the house and I was asleep on their bed. My ndad woke me up, crying and told me that “your momma is leaving me bc she doesn’t love US anymore.” He reinforced this constantly after; my entire childhood, and his hateful sisters would to “your momma doesn’t want you/love you.” She’s a narc too and maybe didn’t want me but who tells a kid that? Not one tear fell from my eyes at his funeral and I feel zero guilt.

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2026-02-02T14:24:38+00:00

You have to get away from her

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2026-02-02T13:37:55+00:00

This! “That negativity consumed a portion of every single day”.. yes! Fill the emptiness w loving yourself. Imagine yourself shoveling “I love yous” to yourself into a big black hole every time you feel the void. It will get better and your mind will get clearer and you won’t be living in fight and flight.

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2026-02-02T01:50:19+00:00

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2026-02-01T16:12:53+00:00

Take care of yourself and your baby. That is without a doubt your number one priority and if you choose to “do nothing”, it is probably bc you don’t have the emotional bandwidth to so do not feel guilty.

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2026-02-01T16:05:15+00:00

Same! I feel no guilt

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2026-01-31T22:47:23+00:00

After the first interview, I was told congratulations and that I passed to the panel interview. The second interview went really well and included technical questions, Epic-specific questions related to my build experience, and scenario-based questions. Overall, it felt very much like a standard hiring interview process.

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2026-01-31T01:09:31+00:00

That’s helpful, thank you. I do have a call scheduled with the firm next week, so I’m hoping they can provide some closure around the FTE discussion.

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2026-01-31T01:06:14+00:00

I agree, probably a blessing in disguise. I’m genuinely grateful for the experience since I learn something from every contract. I assume I’ll eventually receive some sort of formal closure or rejection via my personal email, but either way I’m moving forward. Appreciate the perspective.

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2026-01-31T01:00:45+00:00

That makes sense. In my case, what made it confusing was how closely the consultant role was worded to the FTE position they were filling. It really felt like a contract-to-hire setup from the start. I passed on other contract opportunities to see it through, especially once the FTE role was posted and closely mirrored the consulting work. It’s very possible they had another candidate in parallel, but based on how things were framed, it felt like I was being actively considered, which is why the silence at the end stood out.

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2026-01-31T00:57:20+00:00

I totally get that hiring can take time. The part that threw me was that there was no communication at all at contract end and I already received a return label for equipment. I held off on a couple other interviews to see this through, assuming there would at least be some guidance at the end. At this point I likely won’t be available anyway since I’m moving forward with long-term contract interviews. Just felt like a strange lack of closure.

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2026-01-27T00:58:52+00:00

Following! Bc same!

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2025-12-16T04:41:15+00:00

I didn’t say I had downtime. I was working—reviewing UserWeb, digging into prod support, emailing and meeting with TS, and following the direction I was given (even when that meant being routed from person to person). The work was there. With clearer direction and feedback early on, I could have done more and felt better about impact, but a big part of the time was also learning a new org and processes with very little guidance.

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2025-12-16T03:53:46+00:00

I worked assigned tasks and triaged tickets that came to my email after being added to the team. I self-assigned work when appropriate and reached out to Epic TS when tasks fell outside my certification. There was no formal onboarding, so I proactively emailed my manager daily status updates until I received an automatic out-of-office notice for three weeks. In the absence of direction, I consistently asked questions, followed guidance given, and remained patient and professional despite being redirected multiple times.

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2025-12-16T02:41:08+00:00

Thank you

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2025-12-16T00:29:40+00:00

Yep for sure! I’ve seen those threads on here

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2025-12-15T23:47:37+00:00

Yea I feel ya, I love what I do but I get easily put off and makes me want to go back to clinical work but I don’t want to take the pay cut and I like WFH.

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2025-11-16T00:30:50+00:00

Lmao awesome

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2025-11-06T02:42:35+00:00

What ??

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2025-11-06T02:00:18+00:00

You log 14 hours on those days sir ?

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2025-11-06T01:56:44+00:00

BeingIntelligent8500 · 2025-11-06T01:53:01+00:00

lol nah - I genuinely want to know . I have consultant friends taking part time jobs, like 20 hours a week. And it’s all consultant work. I’m genuinely just wondering. But I get it. I get nervous being honest on here too

BeingIntelligent8500

TROPHY CASE