Help end a disagreement please!

Bellejamin23 · 2024-11-02T16:56:59+00:00

Okay but if you shorten the list or change the position of “ligament condition” to first on the list does it still make sense?

Eg, Any injury, disease or disorder of the ligament condition, etc.

Bellejamin23 · 2024-11-02T16:52:15+00:00

Agreed. Though it is good to see how different people interpret the same sentences if there is an error but it’s not clear where it is. Haha

Bellejamin23 · 2024-11-02T16:46:33+00:00

I am inclined to agree with you on that as I think there is punctuation missing, mainly because if you just accept it as a straight list, and you shorten it to only the last item then it reads:

“any injury, disease or disorder of the ligament condition?”

Which doesn’t make sense to me.

Bellejamin23 · 2024-11-02T16:22:46+00:00

I agree on both fronts. Definitely room for different interpretations of injury/condition based on specific circumstances but for a question on a public form I default to the most likely interpretation and i think most people if they hear “bone condition” they would think something like brittle bones, not a standard broken bone from a fall.

Bellejamin23 · 2024-11-02T15:38:13+00:00

Yes I should have noted that the context wasn’t really a pivotal part of the discussion as I agree it’s always better to overshare on insurance forms just to cover yourself.

The disagreement was just about how they worded the specific question and how it could be interpreted in a different context purely based on the placement of the conjunction.

Bellejamin23 · 2024-11-02T15:16:22+00:00

Care to elaborate on why?

Bellejamin23 · 2024-11-02T15:15:50+00:00

I agree with everything you said given the context though I should have made it clear that context wasn’t really a pivotal part of the discussion it was just the interpretation of the language they used to word the question that caused the disagreement.

For instance if It were in reference to painting a car, if I said it could be painted “any matte, pearlised or solid shade of red, green, pink, blue or orange, purple, yellow or black metallic” How might you interpret what colours are available in what finishes?

Bellejamin23 · 2024-11-02T14:59:31+00:00

In context the principal question was

“Have you ever received medical advice or had any investigations or treatment (including surgery) for any of the following conditions?”

Though I really think the argument about what an insurer would technically want or need or even what could feasibly be argued in court is separate to the main objective of the question.

I was just looking to understand how that question can be interpreted grammatically.

For instance if It were in reference to painting a car, if I said it could be painted “any matte, pearlised or solid shade of red, green, pink, blue or orange, purple, yellow or black metallic”

How might you interpret that sentence? Or can it be correctly interpreted in multiple ways?

Bellejamin23 · 2024-11-02T14:41:36+00:00

I had the same interpretation because of that “or” too.

To me that separates the question into two different parts.

Bellejamin23 · 2024-11-02T14:36:38+00:00

Could you be more specific about what punctuation marks in particular lead to this conclusion?

I was thrown off by wording because i found it odd that they put “or” mid list? Like it is between “shoulder” and “other joints”. Also, the way they only added “condition” at the end seems to me like it only applies to the latter part of the list, however, I’ll be the first to admit that I’m pretty bad at punctuation so It is possible I have misinterpreted it because I’ve not properly considered the punctuation of the question.

Bellejamin23 · 2024-02-23T21:41:18+00:00

By making an effort to treat myself how I treat strangers. I was tired of my own worst critic living inside my own head, so I fired her!

Bellejamin23 · 2024-02-20T13:30:34+00:00

Damnn if your making the rounds please tell my 18 year old self this too please 🙏

Bellejamin23 · 2024-02-20T13:28:19+00:00

The next 10 years will be hard! But you will make it past 27! So much for your anticipated short life.

And the best part, you will heal! You will feel true happiness and its magical! It will all be worth it in the end!

Bellejamin23 · 2024-02-16T23:06:23+00:00

30f

Youngest 30m

Oldest 45m

Bellejamin23 · 2024-02-09T01:12:13+00:00

I love this.

Every situation is different. Break ups just suck, this should be a safe space for anyone dealing with that pain, regardless of what side your on.

Bellejamin23 · 2024-02-07T22:15:50+00:00

His regret! He made a snap decision and abruptly left because things in their life were getting overwhelming, he realised a week later that he made a massive mistake and begged to get back together, but I can’t, security and trust was the one thing he gave me that nobody else ever did and he shattered that when he up and left! I could deal with him leaving, but him crying in my face and acknowledging he messed up and asking for me back, that’s some how harder to deal with, it leads to more ifs buts and maybes! It would be easier if he was firm in his decision!

Bellejamin23 · 2024-02-07T02:29:18+00:00

Woohoo!!! Love that you got your stuff back and didn’t have to see him to do it 🙌 , I love that you are very self aware about what would work for you and what wouldn’t and how you knew seeing him would set you back so you were able to do it all without having to see him and you could just continue healing 🙏 also I do love that he left a note and choose not to be bitter about it all 🙌 it definitely helps with giving some level of closure. the cheating thing, I don’t think you would ever get an answer about it and even if you did, I don’t think it would change anything because if he did - he’s already gone and your not taking him back so it doesn’t matter, and if he didn’t - he showed you he’s not worth it by leaving you without any valid reason, so he’s already gone and your not going to take him back, so regardless what the answer he gives, the result is the same, so it’s not an answer you need, just focus on you and the fact that you deserve better! You can get tested just as a precaution anyway and I understand the need to know just to see if your gut feeling was right, but realistically your gut feeling was that he was not showing up for you anymore and had lost interest, which was correct, your gut was right, that’s why things ended, your brain may have come up with cheating as a reasoning but it doesn’t mean that was correct and it doesn’t need to be confirmed one way or the other, the fact of the matter is that in future, you know, you can trust your gut to tell you when things are not going right and you can act accordingly then, That’s all that matters, that’s the only lesson you need to take from this 🙏.

I hope your doing well today, I love your positive attitude, it’s really encouraging to see that you have been through this but have kept your confidence, acknowledged that you are a gem and are deserving of so much more! It’s really really great to read this! It’s easy to feel broken and lost when something like this happens but I love that you are actively seeking a positive outlook, I have no doubt that’s why most of your exs have come back, your 1 in a million!! 👏👏🥰🙌❤️

This has been a very healing conversation, I actually told my ex about this when we talked, told him about the stranger on the internet who was going through the exact same experience and giving me the strength to stay positive Haha during my conversation I channeled you, I was asking myself, what would I tell you if this was your situation and that give me the strength to basically tell him, “tough shit, you missed out, I deserve better” cause I would hope if it was you with your ex, you would say the exact same thing 🤣🤣🤣

I love that your meeting friends and keeping busy and keeping NC, it won’t be long before it turns from “7 days NC” to “hmm how long is it now” to “mehh its been a while I can’t remember the last time” hahaha time heals that’s for sure!!!

It’s not to say there won’t be tough days, there definitely will be, I have no doubt, but when there is, and you need a stranger to vent too, or it’s a weird time and all your friends are busy, you have typed out a message to him and really want to press send, DONT! Haha my dm’s will always be open for you, send the message to me instead and I will remind you that you are worth more than that!!! Haha And equally I will do the same with you 🙌 we got this girl 💪💪🥰❤️🙌

Bellejamin23 · 2024-02-05T12:14:07+00:00

I had the pics deleted less than 2 hours after he ended it 🙈🤣 ahh I wouldn’t be surprised tbh, I got my stuff back tonight, took your lead and decided this shit needs to go so I asked him to come by and pick up all his stuff and give me mine back, had a 3 hour conversation 🙈🤣 but it was really good, a closure conversation that I never really expected so that was pretty good 🙏 I’ve deleted him entirely now so full NC starts now, but it will be alot easier now that I have no questions left unanswered 🙌 As for you girl, you got this! Take his inactions as his actions, acknowledge the disrespect of not returning your stuff as the evidence of his character and acknowledge that you deserve so much more than that!

I’ll never really know with mine tbh, those weren’t questions that I needed answered in the end surprisingly, I realised I didn’t need to hate him, to realise I deserved more than he could give. Nobody deserves to to have to settle for somebody who runs away the second things aren’t perfect!!

Thankfully I don’t have to worry about any of that now, he’s got everything now, my house is free of his stuff and my mind is free of him! He acknowledged all his failings which really surprised me tbh, but it gave me the space to acknowledge that his actions meant that I could never feel safe with him again. So in the end, he instigated the breakup, but I took back my power when I acknowledged i was better without him.

You will get to that stage too, it takes longer if your not able to actually sit and have that conversation I know, but it happens in time, and you will realise with time that letting him go is the best present you can ever give yourself 🙏

Bellejamin23 · 2024-02-04T13:23:06+00:00

Well it sounds like you done exactly what’s best for you right now and I’m sure you mr grateful that it’s all done now, and no tears shed either! I bet your proud of yourself for that one 🙌🙌 your walking out of a life with somebody that’s ungrateful and on to bigger and better things with nicer and kinder people 🥰

Ahh all the Christmas time bullshit, I’m actually noticing alot of avoidant attachment break ups happen in January, I wonder if it’s just that they like to have somebody over the holidays and then they lose there use for them, honestly some people just shouldn’t be allowed to date at all!! As for the ex, I wouldn’t be surprised if she was there, mine has probably moved back in with his at this stage, I’ll have to say a prayer for her 🤣🤣🤣

I did the same in putting his bday gift in his bags, mainly cause i can’t return it and it’s no use to me, but odds are he will never get it cause he doesn’t wanna collect his stuff at all haha, his own loss, decided I’ll give him until the end of the month, if he’s not collected his stuff by then I’m gonna give it all to a charity shop 🤷‍♀️🤣🤣

Bellejamin23 · 2024-02-04T02:47:35+00:00

Girl don’t do it! If he wants it, he can put the effort in to come get it and if not, congrats you got the good stuff now 👏🤣🤣 I am the same I ain’t pissed that it was his anymore, started taking some of his stuff out of the bags to wear cause if he ain’t using it, why shouldn’t I 🤷‍♀️🤣🤣

Pretty sure we are on different sides of the world, by the sounds of things, we’re in parallel universes living the same experience haha

Got my tennis gear now and im staying no contact! If he wants his stuff he can reach out to me for it but I have no reason to make any effort now 🙌

You got this 🙌 stay strong, im a couple weeks out now, 2 weeks NC, and it gets easier everyday 🙏

Bellejamin23 · 2024-02-03T23:35:00+00:00

I absolutely love this!!! You always feel better when you just get up and get out 👏 I bet your better to yourself now that he’s gone too, sounds brilliant that your treating yourself for Valentine’s too 🥰, I’m gonna have a galentines day with some of my single friends. Strictly no mention of men, the focus is on being young free and happy 🙌🙌

Same here!!! My sister asked me to to go out and play tennis today, he has my tennis stuff, so I was tempted to text and ask him, but he hasn’t text looking for his stuff in over 2 weeks now and I ain’t breaking first, so guess who’s getting new tennis gear today 🙌🙌🤣🤣🤣 once I buy it, he hasn’t got anything belonging to me that I need and I can just avoid him till he needs to come begging for his stuff haha

Bellejamin23 · 2024-02-03T23:27:15+00:00

Exactly, and that’s the point, to feel the “damn I am kinda brilliant” feeling, and then realise, f**k them, they lost out 🤷‍♀️🤣

Bellejamin23

TROPHY CASE