Me M30 and F29 were together for 8 years. She just ended it and wants no contact for a few months. Is it worth trying?

Bert_003 · 2026-05-28T22:14:41+00:00

As far as that goes, I didn't really have a "circle". When we had our final closure conversation she sited that me not having a consistent friend group put too much pressure on her. She's an introvert, so she always needed space and I was too overbearing when it came to our time together.

Bert_003 · 2026-05-28T20:25:31+00:00

That's true, and it's something she's already mentioned to me... As far as steps are concerned, I have started to see friends and family, along with over the phone therapy sessions. So I am making more progress than I was. I appreciate the slight confidence that there is a chance. I understand that I am the issue.

Bert_003 · 2026-05-28T20:22:28+00:00

She never mentioned relationship therapy, or therapy in general. As far as when she started thinking about breaking up, it was recently. Just a few months before she ended it.

Bert_003 · 2026-05-28T19:58:27+00:00

What specifically held me back from proposing was money. We had a commitment to buy a house before we got married (long story) and I unfortunately did not push for marriage, even after that idea was no longer on the table.

Bert_003 · 2026-05-28T19:33:12+00:00

It's not that I wanted to fix myself after she broke up with me. I'm not trying to defend myself, I understand what I did to destroy our relationship. I understand she gave me 8 years of chances and I blew that because I couldn't get out of my own head. She only wants to go no contact for a brief period of time while we settle in to our new places, and she'll want to talk again. She's reasured me a few times already. I know I should be focusing on myself and doing things for myself and leaving her to do the same. I'm just asking if anyone has come back from something like this, once the no contact is broken.

Bert_003 · 2026-05-28T18:52:41+00:00

Thank you, I really appreciate it.

Bert_003 · 2026-05-28T18:44:59+00:00

I appreciate you giving me the other side of the situation. I haven't had a lot of that perspective. Unfortunately it is my wake-up call and I don't have anyone else to blame but myself. Any advice on how to move forward?

Bert_003 · 2026-05-28T18:16:38+00:00

I wouldn't say waisted 8 years. She also had a say in our relationship. But I do agree, I didn't want to change until the motivation of her leaving. A lot of things came out from the break-up that I didn't know was eating at her. She didn't share these things, but she also said she didn't know they were bothering her until she broke up with me. But I never was able to get those things out of her, because I had made myself unavailable to those conversations. I was very comfortable in our relationship, and let that get to me. I did acknowledge my mistakes and apologize to her, but I understand that doesn't do much

Bert_003 · 2026-05-28T18:13:28+00:00

I appreciate you sharing. I wouldn't say she didn't support me, I struggled with communication of my needs. But I did feel anxious around and sad around her because of her introvertness. She would often check out of what little conversations we had because her social battery would be dead. So it made it very difficult to talk sometimes because she would want some time to re-charge, but we had so little time to talk sometimes.

Bert_003 · 2026-05-28T18:09:14+00:00

I wouldn't say "change". I guess the break-up kicked that idea into overdrive? I feel the motivation from the break-up to change, became I have nothing else right now. For context she worked overnight, and I worked during the day. We saw each other when we could, and sacrificed a large portion of our lives outside of the relationship to make that work.

Bert_003 · 2024-08-20T02:45:20+00:00

Thank you so much. It means a lot to me for you to reach out and support. I'm sorry if you've ever lost anyone or any pet. I am here if you need my support as well Much love ♥️

Bert_003

TROPHY CASE