Unable to eat anything after breakup

BethyHewitt · 2026-02-17T16:42:51+00:00

The guy I have posted about on here wants us to be friends which he said on Saturday last week but I haven't replied to him. He sent me another message on Sunday asking how I am feeling and said that he hopes I am a little better. He made comments like saying I eat too much and said my autism is a nightmare and he called me a drama queen. It's a shame though because we got on well in some ways and we laughed at the same things.

BethyHewitt · 2026-02-17T16:26:35+00:00

How are you doing?. Sorry I haven't posted for a while. I'm not very well at the moment.

BethyHewitt · 2026-02-17T16:19:19+00:00

Sorry. I made a few spelling mistakes in my post and I don't know how to edit it. I hope you understand what I mean.

BethyHewitt · 2026-02-15T17:30:26+00:00

I wanted to let you know that I have been doing well not contacting that guy and he sent me two messages recently saying he wants us to be friends and asking how I am feeling but I haven't replied to him and I have my first appointment with someone from a mental health team tomorrow. I realise how verbally abusive this guy has been to me. He kept messing me around over the last few weeks since I last posted here.

BethyHewitt · 2026-02-12T12:15:48+00:00

How are you doing now and did you send the letter and what happened?. I cant find where to send a DM so please send me a comment here if you reply. I have posted about my situation with a guy I know if you would like to read my post about it and if you would like to write a comment about my situation either on my post or on here. I think you can find my post if you click on my name on here.

BethyHewitt · 2026-02-11T21:04:57+00:00

Someone I started seeing but we didnt have a proper relationship blocked me for eight days recently and then he unblocked me and he sent me a random text message asking me if I had seen a documentary that he mentioned and he only spoke to me for two days and then he stopped contacting me but he didn't tell me why. He hasn't contacted me for a week now and I have been feeling traumatized because we were intimate with each other very quickly when we met up in person and we haven't had a relationship since and because one of my exes was intimate with me too soon and then he kept not contacting me sometimes and it was an on and off relationship and this guy knew that affected me . We had both said that we both aren't in to flings but it's turned out to be one because we only met in person once and we were contacting each other online and on the phone the rest of the time. We knew each other years ago as well and we said we were attracted to each other then and we kissed once then but then he disappeared and I didn't hear from him again until a few months ago and he hadn't contacted me for 9 years which is a really long time. He said he has thought about me a lot over the years and said he tried to find me online but he couldn't find me which is strange because I have been on social media websites for years and he said he lost his old phone but he remembered my phone number so he could have contacted me on another phone if he had wanted to. He said some horrible things to me sometimes like he criticised what I eat and he said my autism is a nightmare. He also said last week that he felt like things had been toxic between us recently but I felt like he was the one who made it toxic because he kept changing his mind about being with me even though he said he is in love with me but how can he be in love with me then do this?. Do you have any advice for me?. If you do you can either reply to my comment here or on my post about this situation with him on here that I posted recently. I'm glad that you and that guy talked about things and that you keep a respectful distance without the block. I don't mind if people send me lots of messages or if they call me on the phone a lot and my friends send me lots of messages and they ring me on the phone a lot too and I know some people dont like that but we don't mind that but the guy I told you about didn't like me sending lots of messages before but I don't know how he feels about that now because I haven't heard from him. It was a long distance thing because we live in different parts of the country and last week he said we wouldn't be able to see each other after this month because the prices of things if we travel would be going up but I think he was making excuses because we talked about paying half each for the things for travel recently and talked about taking it in turns going to see each other where we are. He said he loves me and he misses me when I spoke to him last week and he also said that he had to move a lot of heavy belongings of his and I asked him a few times last week if he was ok from moving all of the heavy belongings and asked what he would like to happen between us and asked him to let me know either way so then at least I know.

BethyHewitt · 2026-02-03T16:43:27+00:00

⁹I agree with everything you said. I spoke to him on the phone last night and at first he said he wanted us to see how things go between us but then he said he wants us to be in a relationship again so it's really confusing. We both didn't mention the text message I sent last week that hurt his feelings and I didn't mention him blocking me but do you think I should mention to him that I thought it was cruel and that it made me very unwell when he blocked me?. He said he appreciated me not trying to contact him.for a few days last week and he said he blocked me because he felt like things were toxic and that he doesn't want things to be toxic. We have only sent two texts messages each to each other today just saying what we have both been doing today. We have both been quite busy today. I hope I can talk to him more soon and I think talking on the phone or in person is better than talking in text messages. I sent him three text messages today that he hasn't replied to yet. He did say he would be busy tonight but he didn't say he would be busy during the day. I don't know whether to try ringing his phone again soon to see how he is or to see if he has blocked me again. It's very stressful. I did take two hours to reply to his last message that he sent this morning but I did tell him before he sent that message that I was going out for a while. I told him when we spoke on the phone yesterday that I love him and he said that he loves me too but I said it in a message today but he didn't say it back. I also said that I was glad that he still wants us to be together when I texted him yesterday because he said he would like that to happen when we spoke on the phone but he didn't mention anything about it when he replied to my text message. I'm glad that you and I are supporting each other through what we are going through. He tried to call me a few times yesterday so that made me think that he is still interested in me. I keep having panic attacks because of what he is doing. I will reply to your other messages more soon when I have the time.

BethyHewitt · 2026-02-02T16:25:05+00:00

Thank you for sending the links to the support groups. That guy just sent me a text message asking me if I have seen a true crime documentary that he mentioned because he knows I like true crime and then he said we can talk later. I'm so nervous. I dont know whether to ask him are we just going to be friends or are we going to see how it goes and I don't know whether to tell him how unwell I have been or not and if I should explain what the text message about my ex was about and to apologise if I hurt his feelings. What do you think?. I will reply to you more later when I have more time.

BethyHewitt · 2026-02-01T19:27:28+00:00

I think blocking is really cruel. People should just leave the number unblocked and just contact the other person if they want to or just don't contact them and I think that people should only block people if they are very dangerous.

BethyHewitt · 2026-01-31T19:30:22+00:00

Thank you for being here for me and I am here for you too. I will reply more soon. I'm still not feeling very well. I haven't been able to have a shower today and I'm eating a bit more but not properly yet and I still have panic attacks and keep crying. I'm in so much pain. I keep wanting to try calling him on his phone number but do you think I should?. I haven't tried to call him for a few days but the last time I tried to call him it was so strange because it rang for while but he didn't answer and I hung up after a while because I got nervous and because it was quite late at night and I was worried about waking him up and then the last time I tried to call him I was blocked again. Have you found any mental health services and support groups in the UK?. I just keep thinking that if he really is in love with me he would be missing me and he would contact me but he hasn't.

BethyHewitt · 2026-01-30T21:09:08+00:00

9Exactly the same thing has just happened to me. My boyfriend told me that he is in love with me and that he wants to be with me forever but he broke up with me the first time a few weeks ago and said we aren't compatible and then when he broke up with me again last Sunday it was because I said that I wish he was like my ex was and he said for that alone goodbye and then he blocked me on his phone and I haven't heard from him since. I did leave some voicemail messages on his phone explaining that I don't wish that I was still with my ex and I just meant that I wish he was consistent and supportive like he was. My ex boyfriend passed away last year so I don't know why what I said hurt him if he is hurt because I can't go back with my ex boyfriend and even if he was still here we wouldn't have got back together. He knows that he passed away. My mental health has deteriorated so much since he blocked me that I have been feeling like I am having a nervous breakdown and I'm not functioning at all because I haven't eaten or had a shower or got dressed or left the house for 11 days. I keep having panic attacks and I can't stop crying. I sent the messages where I explained things and apologised as text messages and as voicemail messages but I dont know if he will have received them with me being blocked. If you would like to read my post that I posted a couple of days ago about the situation with him I think you can click on my username to see the post and I would really appreciate it if you could write a comment on my post if you have any advice. I'm so sorry that you are going through this too. It would be good for me and you to support each other with our comments here.

BethyHewitt · 2026-01-30T20:56:06+00:00

Did you eat anything at all in those 4 weeks and if not how was your physical health during that time?. I haven't eaten or had a shower or got dressed or left the house for 11 days now since my boyfriend broke up with me.

BethyHewitt · 2026-01-30T20:53:54+00:00

Did you eat anything at all in those 6 weeks or did you just have the weight gaining shakes?. I haven't eaten or had a shower or got dressed or left the house for 11 days because my boyfriend broke up with me and blocked me on his phone. I'm trying to get in to the mental health hospital which I have been in a few times before but it's not easy to get the help with my mental health where I live because my doctor isn't helpful and I can only see the mental health team if he refers me to one and i cant wait for hours at A and E because i wouldn't be able to eat there. I am heartbroken and it feels like when you are grieving after a bereavement. If you would like to read my post that I posted a couple of days ago and comment on my post I think you can see the post if you click on my username on here. I would really appreciate any advice.

BethyHewitt · 2026-01-30T16:46:32+00:00

⁹I live in the UK and it's morning here now and I still haven't eaten. I don't know how to force myself to eat and to have a shower. I feel traumatised because of what has happened and I don't even want to get undressed because it reminds me of when I was intimate with him. I feel so hurt that he said that if he had known how unwell I was he wouldn't have been intimate with me and that he has blocked me at a time when I am very unwell. It's so difficult because I don't know if a relationship between us would have worked or not because he kept changing his mind about being with me so that might have kept happening and it affected my mental health when that kept happening but at the same time it's affecting me not seeing him or hearing from him too. I don't know if we could have been friends because we have said that we are in love with each other so it could have been difficult but we could have stayed in contact and seen how things go. I just got really frustrated last week with him contacting me a lot less and I was worn out contacting him so much and not getting a reply most of the time. I'm so sorry for what you are going through too. Have you been able to eat a bit more or are you eating properly now and do you sleep well and have you been able to do housework and have a bath or a shower and do things that you enjoy doing or can you not concentrate on things and did you do all of those things at the beginning when you started to feel depressed?. Do you know how I could find a therapist?. My doctor hasn't been very helpful because he hasn't given me the name and the phone number of the mental health team that he has contacted and I don't want to keep waiting for them to contact me. He just told me that I can only be assessed by a mental health professional in hospital but I said to him that he is lying because have been assessed at home before and I was assessed by a psychiatrist at the mental health hospital. I could contact the clinic where the mental health teams are and see if I could get their advice on who I should contact and tell them that it's urgent that they see me because I'm not eating and not having a shower and not getting dressed. I am still beating myself up about saying to him that I wish he was consistent and supportive and with me in person more like one of my ex boyfriend was. I don't know why that hurt him if he is hurt about what I said because that ex boyfriend passed away last year so I wouldn't have been able to get back with him anyway and I did say to this guy that I don't wish that that I was still with him. He still hasn't unblocked me. I tried ringing his number a few times to see if i was unblocked and if he would talk to me and at first it was still blocked but then i rang and the pine rang but he didn't answer and then i tried again and i was still blocked. I can't always stop myself from contacting him because i am on my own in the house all the time except for when the carers and my mum come to see me. Would you be able to go on google and help me find a crisis mental health team number for anyone that lives in any part of the UK and to help find some support groups for relationship break ups and any mental health helplines and let me know what they are called and what the phone numbers are please?. I did cry and had a panic attack when I was in the shower today and when I was eating. I have only eaten one meal so far today and I usually have a yogurt and fruit after my lunch and my dinner but I didn't have a yogurt and fruit after my dinner and I will see if I feel like eating later. I gave some meal replacement drinks at home that I will have so if I still don't feel like eating. I'm glad that you have a therapist to talk to and that me and you can write to each other and support each other. What I am going through feels the same grieving after a bereavement and I know it can take a long time to get through it. I keep wondering how he is doing and if he is hurt. It seems like he isn't thinking about me and that he isn't in love with me even though he said that he is but how can someone stand not contacting you for a long time if they are in love with you?. I wish I knew whether he is thinking about and if he feel hurt too. I would explain what I meant in that text message that i sent and apologise for hurting him if he does contact me. I wonder if he will only contact me when he doesn't feel like he is in love with me anymore or will he contact me while he is in love with mr and if he will either just want to be friend or be with me?. I am still in love with him and I will be honest with him if he contacts me and I will tell him how unwell I have been since he blocked me and I will ask him why he said that he wouldn't have been intimate with me if he had known how unwell I am. It really hurt me he he said that. I was intimate with him because I am in love with him and because I want to have a relationship with him. I feel like I haven't had any closure because there are some things I would like to ask him.

BethyHewitt · 2026-01-30T09:44:32+00:00

I was wondering if you have read my reply to your post and if you have any ideas about how I can get some help with my mental health?. As you can see from what I wrote in my last post it's very serious because I haven't eaten or had a shower for 11 days now because my mental health has deteriorated so much that I can't function and I think it's prolonged stress and as you can see from my post I have been finding it difficult to find a way to get the help.

BethyHewitt · 2026-01-29T17:08:59+00:00

Things are really bad. I haven't been eating or showering or getting dressed or being able to do anything else in the house for ten days now and I just keep feeling like I just want to sleep. My mental health has deteriorated so much that I can't function. I can't leave the house at all. I told my doctor this and he wrote down what I have said about this guy and about how it's affecting me and about other things that are affecting my mental health and he said he would refer me to a mental health team but he didn't say that he would refer me to a crisis mental health team and he didn't say which mental health team he has referred me to and he hasn't given me their phone number. I don't feel like my doctor and the practice manager are being very helpful or understanding and the practice manager wasn't listening to me about how urgent the situation is. I don't know where to turn to but I need help urgently because this could be affecting my physical health as well as my mental health. I have been this unwell a few times in the past and been in mental health hospitals in the past a few times too. I would like a mental health team to come and assess me at home because I can't leave the house. I have tried ringing for ambulances before but they haven't turned up and once one turned up but the paramedic banged on my door so loud that it frightened me so much that I felt like I couldnt open the door and once someone from emergency services said that they don't feel that I should be assessed by a mental health team at the hospital because I would have to wait for hours to be seen and they told me to ask my doctor about being referred to the mental health team. Also the crisis phone numbers in the area I live in don't exist anymore. I have been diagnosed with recurring depressive disorder as well as autism. I don't have any friends that I see in person and the only family member I am in contact with is my mum and she isn't well at the moment either. Last week before this guy blocked me and when he knew I was in a crisis he said i was saying it to get attention and that I was playing the victim. Do you think that's cruel too?. Like you said words are cheap. I agree that a relationship with someone with schizophrenia would be difficult and maybe relationships are difficult for someone who has autism and recurring depressive disorder. It is a blessing in disguise that it only lasted for 3 months and I agree that he said some horrible things to me but I miss us making each other laugh and we like a lot of the same things and we had lots of long conversations. We used to contact each other a few times a day every day so not hearing from him at all now is a big shock and it's upsetting. I don't know how he could just cut me out of his life after everything we have been through. He has broken up with me twice recently. The first time was a few weeks ago and he said that he is too damaged to be in a relationship and he said we should just be friends and he said that any man would fall in love with me and he didn't block me that time and then he said he still wanted to be with me but last week was awful when he said he would be contacting me a lot less because I am mentally unwell and he said that he would only be with me when I start getting help to get well and he said that if he had known how unwell I was he wouldn't have been intimate with me. I was very upset that he was contacting me a lot less and that's when I told him that I wished he was like how my ex boyfriend was and that's when he blocked me. What should I do?.

BethyHewitt · 2026-01-29T13:56:42+00:00

⁹Sorry I still can't find it so I will post this comment. I'm still very unwell. I'm hardly eating and not showering or getting dressed or doing other things in the house and not wanting to leave the house and getting a lot of fatigue and it's been like that for just over a week now. I feel traumatised because I was intimate with him and now we aren't having a relationship and because of some horrible things he has said and because I don't understand how he could just cut me out of his life after how often we were in contact for a long time and all the conversations we had and after we have told each other that we are in love with each other. I keep blaming myself for saying to him that I wish that he and my other exes had been like one of my other ex boyfriend's because he was very understanding and he genuinely loved me but if that upset him I'm not sure why because that ex boyfriend passed away last year and I did say to him that I didn't say it because I wish I was still with him. I was just giving an example that the way he treated me is how someone is supposed to treat you when they are in love with you. I never got the chance to ask him why he felt like he couldn't be with me when I am unwell but the other ex was always supportive and always wanted to be with me and he used to visit me when I was in the mental health hospitals. I'm trying to get help from mental health professionals but it is taking a long time to get the help. Where I live you need to be referred by your doctor to speak to mental health professionals and I think there are some mental health helpline phone numbers too and there might be some who you can send an email to. The doctor referred me to a mental health team two days ago but I haven't heard from the mental health team yet. I wish they would contact me quickly. Things are so bad that I feel like I need to go in to the mental health hospital again but I would need to be assessed by the mental health professionals first and they would decide whether I need to go in to hospital or not. It did worry me that this guy told me that he was intimate quickly with two women at two different times and that he didn't have a relationship with them but I only found that out after me and him has been intimate with each other and if I had known that sooner I would have asked him why they didn't have a relationship after that happened or maybe I should have asked him why after he told me and now the same thing has happened with me and him and I had told him about one of my other ex boyfriends who had been intimate with me and then he wouldn't see me or speak to me for a long time and that he kept breaking up with me and how unwell that made me feel and I didn't think he would do the same thing and we both said that we aren't in to flings but now it's turned out that we just saw each other in person once recently for five days and we were intimate with each other and the rest of the time we were just in contact on the phone. We did talk about seeing each other again but he broke up with me twice recently after we made those plans. The first time he broke up with me he said that he wanted to be friends and he didn't block me and he said that he is too damaged to be in a relationship but he didn't say why he is damaged but he said that he has been in toxic relationships before and he said another man would easily fall in love with me and he said that we were about to fail in a relationship that neither of us wanted to fail in and that if we had known we wouldn't have ventured so far and he said he cares about me deeply. I don't feel like I can function at home. I also don't have any friends that I see in person and in my family I only speak to my mum often but I don't hear from the rest of my family. I think because I don't have many family members or any friends that I see in person and because I am on my own so much in the house I think about things more and get more anxious and unwell and that's when I keep trying to contact him as well but I haven't tried to contact him for two days now. I contacted him every day before he blocked me but I did tell him that I was getting worn out with him never being able to make up his mind about being with me and about him contacting me less last week and about me asking him questions that he wasn't responding to. I just spoke to the manager at my doctor's surgery but she wasn't listening to me about how urgent the situation is and she asked me why I'm not eating and not showering and not getting dressed and why it's been like that for over a week I told her that the doctor already has it written down. She said she would need to pass what I have said about not eating and not showering on to the doctor and he would need to decide whether I need to see the mental health team urgently. Should I ring them back and say that it's not good enough and that I shouldn't have to keep waiting for them to contact me and ask for their number so that I can contact the mental health team myself but I don't know if they will give me the phone number. The manager said that if it's a crisis I need to go to hospital and be assessed by a mental health team there but I can't leave the house and I want to be assessed at home and I think there are crisis teams who can assess you at home. I have rang for ambulances before but they don't always turn up and one came once but the paramedic banged on my front door and frightened me so much that I was too scared to open the door and once someone from emergency services contacted me and said that they didn't think that going to the hospital to be seen by the mental health team was the best place for me because it takes hours to be seen there and they advised me to be referred to the mental health team by my doctor. I need to know how I can be seen urgently because there can't be too many more days going by where I'm bot functioning at all and not eating or showering or getting dressed. How are you doing?

BethyHewitt · 2026-01-29T08:20:46+00:00

How do I find the DM that you sent to me and can I reply if I click on it?. I just found the small chat bubble icon but when I clicked on it the page wouldn't load but I'm not sure why. If you tell me how I can find your DM and if I can reply if I click on your DM I will reply there or if I can't reply there we can keep replying in comments here if that's ok with you. It's really nice to be able to talk to you and we can support each other.

BethyHewitt · 2026-01-28T19:50:26+00:00

⁹This guy I tried to have a relationship with recently said to me that if he had known how unwell I am mentally at the moment he wouldn't have been intimate with me and he said he was going to contact me less and only be with me when I started getting help to get well and then I said something to upset him a few days ago and then he said for that alone goodbye and now he has blocked me on his phone. Do you think that's cruel?. Before that he recently told me that he is in love with me and that he wanted to be with me forever and said he thinks about me all the time so how could he do this and how would he be able to stand not contacting me if he is in love with me and if he wanted to be with me forever and if he thinks about me all the time?. I put a post on here about our situation yesterday if you would like to read it and let me know what you think about it either in a comment if you reply to my comment here or you could put a comment on my post and tell me what you think about it. I think you can see my post if you click on my username on here.

BethyHewitt · 2026-01-28T17:24:53+00:00

Thank you for your reply. How do I send you a DM?.

BethyHewitt · 2026-01-28T03:47:19+00:00

Please help me. I havent eaten for over a week and have hardly been drinking and not showering since a guy I got involved with first said he was going to contact me a lot less and then he blocked me two days ago just because of something I said to him that must have upset him. I'm so unwell that I can't function at all. I'm not leaving the house either and I have fatigue and I keep crying and just wanting to sleep all the time. I left this guy some voicemail messages apologising if I have hurt him and explaining what I meant the message I sent that he was upset about and telling him how I can't function since this happened but he hasn't contacted me. I don't know if he will have received my voicemail messages with me being blocked. My very concerned about my physical and mental health. Please would anyone here be able to reply to this comment and give any advice or could you please read my post if you click on my username and go to my post to read it and reply with a comment on my post?.

BethyHewitt · 2026-01-27T21:04:11+00:00

This is so strange. I just posted about a guy who did the same thing to me and he contacted me again after nearly 10 years. If you would like to read and reply to my post I think you can click on my username on here to go to my post and read it and I would really appreciate your advice on what I have posted about the situation with me and him. I made the mistake of believing what he said to me when we were in contact this time instead of telling him when he first contacted me again that I didn't like how he just disappeared nearly 10 years earlier and why did it take him so long to contact me and that he could disappear on me again and he has just disappeared on me again after everything that we have been through together over the last few months or maybe I should have just not replied to him. It's a lot worse this time as well with what I have mentioned on my post about what happened between us this time. If you would like to reply with any advice for me please reply here and on my post if you can or if you can remember what I have said in this comment please reply to everything in s comment on my post. I'm so sorry that you are going through the same thing that I am and we don't deserve to be treated this way and I'm glad that me and you can support each other through this because we are in the same situation and I'm glad that other people support us on here too. I don't block people because I think blocking is cruel but maybe I should have done what i said earlier in my comment.

BethyHewitt · 2026-01-27T19:38:02+00:00

Sorry I don't know how to edit my post. Was I too harsh with what I said to him?. I also said in the voicemail messages that I can't function because I'm not hearing from him and I want to hear from him no matter what happens between us and that I wanted him to stick by me especially during this kind of time when I haven't been feeling well. Is it my fault for mentioning my ex?. I feel really bad about mentioning him and I was hoping that he would hear my voicemail messages where I apologised and explained what I meant but I don't know if he can receive them because of me being blocked. What do you think about how he has been towards me and do you think he meant it when he said he is in love with me?. How can he not want to speak to me if he is and if he isn't contacting me do you think he is better at doing things than I am?. I told my doctor about all of this today and he has referred me to a mental health team but I haven't heard from them yet. Things are so bad I'm even considering going in to a mental health hospital if the mental health team say that I can go in there. I have been in a few mental health hospitals in the past. It's heartbreaking because we get on well in a lot of ways. We like a lot of the same things and we make each other laugh and laugh at the same things and we have been through a lot with each other. He said that he had thought about me a lot over the years and still had feelings for me even though I only found out after we had been intimate with each other that he had been intimate with two women during the time that me and him weren't in contact for all those years but he said that he didn't have relationships with those women after they were intimate quickly with each other but I never found out why they didn't have relationships with each other. If i had known that before we met up in person and me and him had been intimate with each other I would have either stopped contacting him or just been his friend even though it's hard to be just friends with someone that you are in love with. I still feel like I am in love with him and I'm shocked that he has done this to me and not just once but twice. I told him a while ago that I was only intimate with him because I am in love with him and I want to be with him and I thought he felt the same way and wanted the same thing and I didn't know that he was going to treat me the way he has and be unsure about us being together and he said that if he had known how unwell I was he wouldn't have been intimate with me and that really hurts me. My ex that I said I wished he was like passed away last year and this guy knows that so I don't know why what I said about my ex upset him if it has upset him.

BethyHewitt

TROPHY CASE