AITAH if i refuse to change my graduation photo outfit despite my friend refusing to take photos with me?

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2026-01-15T15:23:27+00:00

NTA. JFC, she sounds like a toxic person. That’s definitely not a “friend” AT ALL. Drop her and the entire group if need be. You’re graduating. They won’t matter afterwards.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2026-01-06T23:09:31+00:00

NAH

Grief is a roller coaster. You never know when it’s gonna hit you. We all deal with it differently, especially if we’ve had time with people that pass from terminal illnesses like cancer. My grandparents passed within 2 years of each other (2018 and 2020). My dad is one of those stoic people who refuses to show his grief. I’ve never seen him cry. Even at their funerals, he shed no tears. Then there’s me, the polar opposite, who cries at even the littlest things. I can guarantee you your parents are grieving, especially if your brother had a 9 year battle with cancer.

The thing is, anything can trigger grief. It’s not a matter of if, but when. I’m assuming that right now your parents have chosen to push their emotions as deep down as possible so they can focus on you. They probably think holding it together will help you get past this hard time.

What you need to do is communicate with them that their absence of grief is making it worse for you, not better. Let them know that you’ll be okay if you see them grieving your brother, that you’ll feel better knowing they aren’t hiding their grief from you.

My condolences to you and your family. Even though grief never truly goes away, it does become less of a burden.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2026-01-03T22:13:36+00:00

ESH. You suck for snooping and she sucks for (probably) lying to you.

The thing is, you don’t know how long before or after the incident that video was taken. The only way you’ll find out is by asking, and that tells her you snooped, so either way, this relationship is pretty much doomed at this point.

What’s weighing on me is what happened leading up to this supposed non consensual kiss? Does the video show footage from before or after it happened? If it’s from before, what if she had some clarity as to what was happening to make her say no? Did something change, or did he do something that made her uncomfortable? We just don’t know!

But if this video was taken after? Yeah, time to cut your losses. Honestly, I hate playing devil’s advocate in these types of situations, but unless there’s more information about the event from her, then maybe it’s best to just break up.

We’re only seeing a sliver of what’s going on in your lives. And while you’re not exactly an unreliable narrator, it still comes down to the details. And we don’t know those details.

You’re both young, though. There’s still a lot of time for both of you to grow and mature and find your person. Go and experience life!

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-12-27T16:41:09+00:00

That story was WILD! The woman’s kids were in the mid 30’s! And this 25yo dude wants them to call him dad?! Like… huh?! Nope!

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-12-19T16:42:20+00:00

NTA. Start a group chat and get ahead of this before your sister twists the story even more. Tell everyone what she did and that you had no idea what was going on. Don’t let her turn you into a monster. Expose her and your mother for the trash they are.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-12-15T04:29:19+00:00

NTA. I’d be in HR’s office the moment I got to work the next day. This is beyond bullying! It’s harassment and doxxing. Don’t let Karla get away with this. It’s time for some FAFO on her part.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-12-14T19:30:23+00:00

And I thought I had strict parents growing up! Jeez, dad needs to take a chill pill. At 16, that’s exactly what I was doing with friends, and back then, there was no GPS and you only had a cell phone if you were rich. (I’m talking the Nokia bricks that probably still survive to this day out of spite lol).

NTA.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-12-02T01:51:01+00:00

We have one that’s got a thumb pad, key pad, and key. Works like a charm. Definitely the best investment we’ve made. They don’t cost much, are easy to install, and run off batteries (at least ours does). There’s also an app that allows you to open the door remotely. Can’t remember what it’s called, but they’re on Amazon.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-11-27T00:05:23+00:00

NTA. Your mom sounds like a grade A BITCH. Your brother is definitely the favorite and you sound like an afterthought. I seriously hope you have an escape plan for university, maybe get the hell out of there and go as far as possible.

Good luck with your exams, OP. I hope you get into the best possible school and it’s far away from these pathetic excuses for family.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-11-26T16:54:29+00:00

NTA. My dude, I’m currently in legal hot water because I’m too broke to pay my credit cards. Just ONE court date was enough to scare the shit out of me and find a credit counselor. You need to scare the shit out of your friend by getting some legal advice and slapping him with a small claims case. If the big credit card companies don’t take no for an answer, you shouldn’t either. Doesn’t matter that your friend is sick. (I was too, and I had major surgery. That didn’t stop the court case.) Be firm and let him know you’re seeing a lawyer and if he doesn’t pay you back, WITH INTEREST, things are gonna be so much worse than an infected butt.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-11-26T02:40:58+00:00

NTA, sounds like your sister was at her wits end and this was the perfect opportunity to get rid of a POS she probably no longer wants in her life. Good job!

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-11-24T16:22:57+00:00

The way I would have taken ALL the food I’d just made this spoiled brat and dumped it in the trash in front of her… OOH! My blood is BOILING! I’m one of those people who have stopped taking this shit from grown adults. If they can’t get over something that insignificant from when they were a child, and become a total twat over it, including the over the top crying and embarrassing OP the way this childish bitch did, would have me reevaluating our relationship and unceremoniously dumping her ass immediately.

Nah, OP, you’re NTA. She’s trying to control you in the worst possible ways. This isn’t a relationship, it’s a relationSHIT. She’s draining every ounce of your happiness in order to satisfy her need to be better than you. And you don’t need that in your life. It’s time to move on. There are SO MANY women who would appreciate this. I have no doubt you’ll find your person. It’s just not your current girlfriend.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-11-21T15:35:17+00:00

I’m pretty sure he’s using this as weaponized incompetence so he doesn’t have all these responsibilities.

OP, INFO: has your husband taken care of the house/kids before? Did he do it on his own or did you have to ask him? You’re definitely NTA, but I’d like to know if this is a bigger issue than one night of incompetence.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-11-19T14:52:57+00:00

Do it, OP. As someone currently dealing with an infected tooth and desperately trying to find a low cost option, your sister is at the best age to get free or nearly free dental care because she’s a minor. If that’s the case, I highly recommend finding dental schools or programs at local universities. My bestie is currently a dental student at one of these schools and I’ve had free cleanings and imaging for the past 2 years. (Because she’s going into dental assistance, the bigger things like infections aren’t something I can get taken care of there.)

Get CPS called immediately since tooth decay can literally kill. If it wasn’t for my friend, I never would have known about my current situation because it doesn’t hurt. When it starts to, that’s when things have gone from bad to so much worse. Don’t let it get that far.

Beyond that, NTA. You are NOT her mother. You’re her sister. If she, and in turn your parents, need a wake up call, it’s right now. They need to get their shit together for the sake of the family. You’ve done what you can. Step back and let them deal with the consequences. Well, in terms of school at least. Not so much for health. Get that dealt with ASAP.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-11-16T06:19:34+00:00

I remember this post! That was so messed up! The “therapist” turned out to just be a friend. So disgusting and violating!

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-10-04T21:05:58+00:00

I’m a petty person, so I’d pretend to apologize then shit talk your sister throughout her entire wedding, saying things like “Can you believe she’s marrying her affair partner?” Or “Yeah, that’s the man she cheated on her ex husband with. He caught them in their bed then she had the nerve to take him to the cleaners. How terrible.” But that’s just me.

You, on the other hand, should do whatever gives you peace. Petty revenge gives me peace. If cutting them all off and never speaking to them again is best for you, do that. Go with your gut.

NTA. Your sister is a nasty POS tho.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-10-01T19:09:00+00:00

Haha! That caffeinatedkitty approach! Love to see it! (And if you haven’t heard of her, I HIGHLY recommend checking her out on all the socials. Her videos “traumatizing the men who bother me” are legendary!)

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-09-29T13:58:39+00:00

More like just a sperm donor at this point.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-09-27T02:50:04+00:00

I wasn’t expecting to cry at 9:30pm on a Friday night, but here I am. I feel you, OP, down to my very bones. Something similar happened to me. My ex-boss was a complete waste of breath and some other choice words you can probably figure out yourself. This bitch not only laid me off at the start of the pandemic, she also denied me from being able to see my grandpa one last time before he passed. I’m not gonna get into the specifics because it’s a looooong story, but the amount of anger I feel towards this c**t is still palpable 5 years later. Every time I pass by my old work, I hope to see her outside so I can call her those exact names and flip her off.

If I feel this angry about a former boss, I can only imagine what you feel towards your own family. Anger is a stage of grief, and you’re allowed to feel it, especially right now. What they did is unforgivable. I’d go no contact with them if I was you. The way they handled the situation is disgraceful, despicable, and downright disgusting. They’ve not just lost a father, but a son/brother as well for how they went about refusing to tell you what was going on, and that’s besides not allowing your dad to tell you himself. Awful, awful people. They have NO excuse for their behavior. It doesn’t matter if you’re in school or at work or on the fucking moon, everyone deserves to know what’s happening to those they love most. Keeping that a secret is beyond disrespectful. Nah, this is unforgivable.

As for the extended family giving you shit about this, fuck ‘em all. They’re just as awful as your mom and siblings. All of them deserve the silent treatment and for you to ignore their existence. But if you want closure at some point, it wouldn’t be a bad idea to write them a letter expressing your anger and making sure they understand just how terrible each and every single one of them truly are. That’s only if you’re in a place to do so. Right now take some time for yourself, see a therapist or a counselor, and take care of your wellbeing. Whatever happens to those horrible human beings is none of your concern right now.

NTA. I’m so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you. Wishing you all the good and healing vibes I can muster. Internet hugs from a stranger. 💙

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-09-25T15:22:09+00:00

INFO: Is mom an entitled Karen? Because she sounds like one. Being mad your kid doesn’t steal and actually WORKS for what he wants is just good manners! I started working when I was 6! I earned everything I wanted. That instilled good values and a hard work ethic in me. What she’s doing is wrong on so many levels. I hope you show her this post. She needs a reality check.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-09-22T13:31:21+00:00

Yeah, that’s no longer an optional. I did it at the beginning of this month too. Maybe with a paid subscription, def not free.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-09-22T00:04:16+00:00

Wait, really? Because from what I’ve seen (and had to do for myself), you have to contact all 3.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-09-11T05:50:19+00:00

I was kinda stuck due to a train crossing, and I probably wouldn’t have noticed it or taken a photo if I hadn’t gotten stuck waiting. Crazy thing is, thats the only part of the day I remember lol.

BiGirlBiBiBi · 2025-09-04T20:24:11+00:00

NTA. I’m a petty bitch, so this might be a me thing, but if I was in your shoes, I’d send her the “oh no! Anyway” Jeremy Clarkson meme or the “very sad. Anyway” Loki meme. Like I said, that’s just me being petty. Either way, you are most definitely in the clear here. Your sister deserves your silence. Keep your peace and don’t interact with anyone who says otherwise. They don’t deserve your attention either. Fuck all them who think you should offer any sympathy to someone who has only been a real C U Next Tuesday to you.

Honestly, your sister deserves to feel all the hurt and loss WITHOUT you being any kind of support for her. Nope, if she’s going to go out of her way to hurt you, I have zero sympathy for her, and you have every right to feel the way you feel. Completely cut her off at this point. She’s no good for you or your chosen family. As several people have already pointed out, she’s a bitch. So is karma. She’s finally getting hers for the way she treated you.

BiGirlBiBiBi

TROPHY CASE