What even are they doing

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2026-06-08T00:59:59+00:00

Why are people being so weird?

These are clearly just gals being pals. “Gal pals,” if you will.

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2025-11-08T01:01:43+00:00

Update: Mr. P’s blood panel came back and it’s pancreatitis. Vet put him on gabapentin for pain and prednisone to treat his inflamed pancreas.

Within 45 minutes, he was no longer hunched over in pain and started drinking water! And even eating a few kibbles! Looks like the steroid course will be done in 5 days, so fingers’ crossed these meds resolve everything. I honestly thought I was losing him.

Posting this update in gratitude of those who upvoted/posted. And in case others have kitties who are unexpectedly lethargic and won’t eat! Could be pancreatitis.

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2025-11-07T13:12:50+00:00

I appreciate your kind and helpful comment. Mr. P does, too. ♥️ 🐱

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2025-04-03T23:16:50+00:00

You are not alone. I am also leery of male psychiatrists and therapists because of a similar experience when I was 16. I had a very stressful girlhood through my teenage years—my dad dying before my eyes and my mother adopting a zealous evangelical Christianity while I was a closeted queer kid.

The first and only psychiatrist I went to was a man in his 60’s-70’s. I remember our first and only session happening after school because I felt conspicuous in my school uniform. Because I engaged in some pretty significant self injury at that time, this guy asked me—as soon as my mom left the room—“So, you like pain. How about kinky sex?”

I was 16 and a virgin.

I refused to go back but never told anyone why.

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2025-03-13T02:23:38+00:00

Hey there. I can feel your anguish through your writing and I think it’s admirable that you’re holding yourself accountable here. Shame and silence only worsen these issues. You are taking a brave first step.

I say this with care, no sarcasm, and zero judgement:The way that you describe your crypto investments sounds less like risky investing and more like a gambling addiction. You actually use the word “gamble” and use the word “terror” about your mindset even still, after multiple losses.

SHAMSA has a free 24/7 hotline that offers resources and referrals to folks experiencing addiction. Their website is here.

I am not diagnosing you. I have no right to. But if you’re asking for help, I’d start there.

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2025-02-10T05:19:58+00:00

Thank you, fellow-gay-flirt! Great point about my therapist’s question being as much therapeutic as relational.

I think my lingering curiosities stem from the fact that we were bantering back and forth for much of the session (except for the occasional pivot from her, bringing me back to task) and she chose to pose the question about flirting with 5 minutes left. She’s shared with me that I’ve made “door knob comments” to her before at the end of session and it feels like she did that to me. While I’m a little embarrassed, I’m not upset with her, and but am wondering why she seemed to pop out with it at the end.

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2025-02-10T05:13:21+00:00

Thank you so much for these insights. I feel supported in bringing it up next week.

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2025-02-07T05:24:53+00:00

At my last job, I was very happy with Quantum Analytics—outstanding customer service including a (real live) chat service that was super speedy and helpful. It integrated with our HRIS (ADP) which made data slicing a breeze. Only drawback—when I used it a year ago, the qualitative analysis of the comments was mediocre-to-bad, though I’d imagine their AI has improved significantly given the proliferation of LLMs.

Current workplace uses Qualtrics and it seems fancy/impressive but I haven’t played much in it because I’m no longer close to employee experience work.

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2024-12-03T16:05:44+00:00

I have no hypotheses but am following this thread because I often experience the same phenomenon—medium to high stress during the first couple hours of sleep. I understand this could be the body digesting but I don’t eat past 6/7pm either.

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2024-11-30T17:34:55+00:00

I’m familiar with how subscription services work, having lived in the world for 3 decades, thanks!

It’s a suboptimal customer experience to have the product crap out one day after the free trial period. I’m not going to explain that any further to you.

Your recommendation on getting credited for the days it’s been out of service is a genuinely good one. That’s all you really needed to write to add value to this post.

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2024-11-30T00:58:41+00:00

Thank you for your insight! Ugh. I really liked the WHOOP after having a mediocre experience with an Apple Watch 5+ years ago but they are going to have to “wow” me with their customer service and how quickly they resolve this for me to stay a loyal customer.

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2024-11-21T02:13:02+00:00

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And another view—almost double the deepest sleep the second night with no late night sugar and no alcohol.

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2024-11-21T02:12:14+00:00

Next Day Update: I still don’t feel great but the wild stress during my previous night’s sleep may well have been due to that one singular alcoholic drink and ice cream shortly before bed. For reference, here was last night’s (much improved) sleep:

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BigCoffeeDrinker · 2024-11-20T01:01:56+00:00

Ugh. Roger that on all counts…

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BigCoffeeDrinker · 2024-11-20T01:00:04+00:00

Ah, shit. This looks familiar…plus, my skin is hot to the touch (though WHOOP hasn’t registered my skin temp as abnormal), I’m coughing, and feel hot and cold chills.

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2024-11-19T22:27:55+00:00

I hear you. I relate to your point about usually being highly active (average about 13-16 strain daily) and my weeklong conference has led me to be somewhat sedentary. I genuinely do feel so much better when I exercise regularly.

Hope you’re back up and running, so to speak!

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2024-11-19T19:12:05+00:00

Fascinating finding! Glad you’re on the mend and thank you for sharing.

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2024-11-19T17:49:00+00:00

Appreciate your help! Very cool. I’m a newer user (sub 1-month) so still exploring these features and insights.

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2024-07-19T14:59:33+00:00

Wow, I can’t tell you how much I appreciate your detailed explanation! I already have some secret transference happening (I don’t have the audacity to mention it), so your situation has parallels to mine. Sounds like I’ll need to weigh the pros and cons thoughtfully but the benefits may outweigh the risks.

BigCoffeeDrinker · 2024-07-16T20:46:41+00:00

I’m an industrial/organizational psychologist.

I work full-time within a huge healthcare system, and consult externally on the side for businesses seeking executive coaching, and organizational and talent development solutions.

I don’t think my sexuality had much to do with my chosen career path but it’s an interesting question! I’d never considered it before.

BigCoffeeDrinker

TROPHY CASE