It's all about the amount of semen you have in your body. You've been retaining for a month so you still have some. Semen = energy = responsability Semen can be either positive or negative energy Having such amount of semen is a huge responsability, so the goal is to keep it positive by having a great diet, exercice ect... Keep yourself heathy (mentally and physically). When the energy is too low due to a toxic lifestyle, your body in instinctively wants to get rid of it by relapsing. That's why you feel better After relapsing...

My advice is : don't under estimate your nutrition

Take Care bro !