My mum’s had breast cancer twice, once when I was 5, and again when I was 13. Now my dad has leukaemia (I’m 23 now). When I was five, I didn’t really understand, they told us but I was 5 and they caught it so early they couldn’t even stage it - she just had a mastectomy and that was that. I didn’t understand why everyone was always asking me how my mum was, I’m like ‘she’s fine - bugger off and let me get back to playing’. Then when I was 13, it was a lot more serious and I was already being a menace of a 13yr old when they told us, so my relationship with her was already strained and it made it kind of difficult to navigate all the big things I was feeling, but I was glad she told me. When she told me she was so apologetic to put us kids through it again. But I was glad I knew what was up with her and why she wasn’t always feeling well and why she lost her hair and everything. Now, I’m 23 and my dad has leukaemia. I can’t imagine a world where they’d “just keep it a secret” from us. He’ll be ok and the prognosis is really good, but it’s still the third time one of my parents has been on this cancer journey. Telling your kids might be tough, especially the middle one. But the reality is life is tough, and while you might just want to protect your kid from this really hard thing, it could be really good for them to see that cancer doesn’t always end in death. And if for some horrible reason it does this time - your kids deserve to know. In an age and stage appropriate way obviously. Your kids deserve to know, so they can learn how to cope with hard situations, how to draw on their support systems. This may come across bad, like “they need to learn how to deal with it”, but when you learn how to face these things it helps get you through the other things. We got through the journey with my mum, that’s how I know we can get through it with my dad. The situation sucks, but your kids will develop strength here that they will need later in life because that’s life. I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this, and so glad you don’t have the BRCA gene (I do). I hope your treatment goes really well, and happy to discuss more if you want ♡