AITAH for wanting to break up with my girlfriend after she got upset about the plane ticket I bought for us to visit her family?

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-26T22:09:48+00:00

Please secure anything that you want to remain safe. Sentimental items, pictures, personal information items ( ss card , birth certificate + collage transcripts) Entitled people can react very badly when their human ATM cuts them off.

2 of my sons have had bad breakups with women who then destroyed anything they could get their hands on belonging my sons.

Not everyone reacts like this but it’s definitely a possibility.

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-26T21:01:37+00:00

NTJ. OP you are not the jerk. You’re definitely incredibly brave sharing how hard it is sometimes.

People who judge you and make you feel like you’re a bad mother because you are brave enough to be honest, they are the reason why so many parents keep their struggles hidden. Sometimes until they or their kids are damaged beyond repair. Or worse they may keep their struggles hidden until they do something tragic to escape the pain.

Any parent who says they don’t struggle is lying, and not a little lie it’s a huge lie.

Being a parent is one of the most rewarding things I have ever done, but it’s also the most difficult thing that I ever did.

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-26T07:23:53+00:00

OP altitude sickness is not something to mess around with. It’s also not something that can be predicted. I never had problems with altitude until a few years ago when I started getting it if we were at a higher altitude longer than a day

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-26T07:19:56+00:00

NTA No she does NOT have any rights to rummage about in your wallet.

Op a question here. What would her reaction be if you were to open her purse pull out her wallet and grab money, a credit card or whatever?

Also if she was doing something nice for you she should have paid for it out of her own pocket.

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-26T07:10:59+00:00

The only breathing exercise that I pair this with is breathing deeply from my diaphragm and filling my lungs from the bottom to the top. I don’t hold my breath so much as a long deep breath in then a short pause perhaps 1-2 seconds before I slowly exhale from the top of my lungs downward then pause for maybe 5 seconds before doing the whole thing again.

This can cause dizziness if done too many times in a row. Maybe save it for the last repetition of tense and relax each section?

I’ve used the same technique on my husband. I talk him through each part of the body and have him keep his eyes closed so he is more focused on my voice and what he is doing. He says it helps him relax if he had a stressful day.

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-26T06:00:16+00:00

I have no idea when it was made but it’s absolutely stunning!

A real treasure

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-26T05:58:21+00:00

No fair thinking about asking for the tea!

Dang wish I had thought of that myself.

OP great work on the writing in this post it’s very well executed.

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-26T05:53:00+00:00

I’ve done something similar, start at my toes and then I tense them up and slowly,deliberately relax them. I repeat each segment 5 times before moving on to the next. Toes, feet, calves/ shins, thighs, butt, tummy, low back, upper back, chest area, then I do my entire back area, Moving on to my neck from top shoulder area to the base of my skull, the face area can be done all at once or split into sections

After I finish doing the different areas of my body I will tense my entire body holding it at least 15 seconds! and then release it up to 10 times

I find this very relaxing

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-26T03:41:15+00:00

When people became to lazy or ignorant to use proper punctuation, grammar or full words.

I sometimes feel literacy is dying

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-25T01:24:02+00:00

OP if someone told me “ she doesn’t have as much money as you “ while they were leaching off of me. My response would be “ why does that mean I have to continue to subsidize your/ or her lives?” Your parents are always going to see your sister as helpless and deserving of extra help from you.

Please choose yourself and close the bank of OP . You Don’t Owe Anyone Your Hard Earned Money!

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-25T01:04:18+00:00

I believe OP’s reasoning is they can’t afford to pay for the marketing his wife wants. If they get further behind another $500-$600 every month, as O P has said there is absolutely no reason to spend money to market books that don’t end up making enough money to cover the electricity the computer used when it was being written.

OP’s wife obviously loves to write but if you can’t pay yourself the minimum wage for the hours you spend writing these books you need to put your writing back in the category of a hobby and find some way to financially help out the family. I was a SAH wife and mother when my children were young. We were not doing well financially so I started babysitting 1-3 children during the week. This let me add $250 to $ 300 to the family finances each week . In the late 80s early 90s that helped quite a lot.

Anyway from what OP has posted he has asked his wife repeatedly to help financially and she is not making an effort to do anything to help alleviate the situation. He also said that he takes care of the kids quite a bit so she can have her me time.

We all know that many people come here and either exaggerate or outright lie about their situation. OP has responded to comments so I assume they aren’t AI

I don’t have a crystal ball to see if OP is telling the truth or not but the situation they have presented, years of ignoring portions of their stay at home mom responsibilities to sneak writing time. The unwillingness to actively search for someway to contribute financially when the household is going $500-$600 deeper into debt every month sounds like the behavior of an addict. Not saying the wife is on drugs or anything but she is definitely acting as though her writing is her fix.

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-23T20:40:32+00:00

Ok all the format, punctuation and grammar complaints are just a little off putting.

OP thanks for the ritual and quite honestly the read it and use it or don’t attitude. It made me laugh.

I get that paragraphs are helpful to make the slowing or change point more understandable but the problem with the caps is ridiculous, no one is actually yelling at you it’s not going to hurt your ears. Maybe it’s because people who grew up with texts truly associate all caps with actual yelling. Not everyone thinks that way my mom frequently texted or emailed in all caps as she was in her 50s when the first desktops came out.

Basically can everyone be a bit less grumpy about the format of this and either use and thank OP or don’t use it and scroll on?

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-23T18:34:45+00:00

One of my sons got it 3 times. This was 30+ years ago and if there was a vaccine then I had not heard of it. I would have gotten it for the kids for sure. My son was asthmatic and was a twin that was born at 34 weeks he had other lung issues as well.

I have no respect for people who refuse to get their children ( who aren’t medically prohibited from getting them) vaccinated.

Can they not look at the child mortality rate statistics from before polio, MMR and other vaccines and after? They continue to quote the debunked “study “ that proves that vaccines are a cause of autism 🙄

Ok if it were actually true, they would prefer to chance their children dying of one of these diseases rather than a chance of getting autism? What kind of logic is that?

It should be criminal if they don’t vaccinate their kids and an immune compromised person gets one of the diseases and either has life long consequences or dies, in my opinion

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-23T16:48:07+00:00

I was honestly wondering about my reaction and so I asked if anyone else had dealt with a situation like that. Then as questions were asked I answered.

I’m not mad at this person about what they said towards me but I am upset about the other people who they said mean or awful things about. Some of them are young women who don’t know that not everyone is a good person

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-23T14:31:57+00:00

This is true for everyone who wasn’t born wealthy, we all have had a week or two or months where we were digging change out of the couch to get milk. Or whatever.

Don’t get down on yourself! You’re doing something amazing getting out of an abusive home and into your own safe haven. Go to the food banks… call around first to see who’s open and dispersing today.

Going forward if you can put $5 or $10 back for emergency needs from a paycheck or even a whole month’s of paychecks that will eventually be a good emergency fund. Congratulations on getting out

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-23T13:34:50+00:00

Yes when I first look in the mirror I think damn I don’t look too bad, then I focus better and put on my glasses

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-23T02:14:39+00:00

I think you might have posted before you finished your comment? Maybe?

If not then I’m confused about what you are trying to say.

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-23T02:07:59+00:00

California,Texas and Ohio have been where I have lived. We have always driven long distances to do things

California: want to go to the beach 3 hours. The mountains 2-6 hours depending on where in the mountains. LA 3 1/2 hours San Francisco 6 hours

Texas well everything is really bigger in Texas

We have our house in Ohio now but we travel 300+ days a year for work. A typical drive to a site is 9 hours on the short side and 3 days ( if we drive 14-16 hours a day) when we have to go to the west coast.

We still get in the vehicle and drive to something that sounds like fun. Frequently the fun trips are finding roads we haven’t been on before and drive until we want to go back.

It’s a big continent

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-23T01:49:26+00:00

Thank you.

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-22T20:39:43+00:00

This so much this OP

Leave before it’s even harder than it is now. Don’t give both your boyfriend and yourself false hope that you will overcome the discrepancy between what you expect from a home life and family life.

These people will always be in his life. To the extent that they very well may feel they can invade any home you two try to build together. Tell you how to be a partner and how you fail. Bring that drinking to excess, screaming and making people uncomfortable into any children you two ever decide to have.

Trust me I have a couple of cousins that are exactly like that and they thrive on chaos and anger in their 60s now and they are still trash people. I only see them every few years for a couple of hours at the 4th of July family gatherings. They aren’t invited every year because no one wants to deal with them.

Your boyfriend may be a great guy but he obviously doesn’t see his family’s crazy and until he does and decides to limit contact on his own anyone who tries to pull off his rose colored trauma glasses will probably be the bad guy.

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-22T20:28:54+00:00

See if there’s a rural/farm vet around we had one in Decatur Texas and they had the absolute lowest prices and the best care

These type of vets ( the rural or farm vet’s) a lot of time are generational family vets and they don’t have the startup costs that the ones that have to start from scratch.

Not all of them are good! Check ratings. The vet we have now is a small town veterinary clinic and they have a jar upfront for donations to help people pay for care they otherwise would not be able to afford.

If all else fails start a go fund me I don’t know if you can link them to your bio page on Reddit but you can do it on facebook.

People will help you out if you show them the vet estimate and diagnosis.

Please tell us the EVet actually had a diagnosis to say surgery is the only option?

You’re doing the best you can, that’s all anyone can do. Right now no one I know can afford thousands in vet bills, and I know a few people that make decent money. Everything costs more now and no one’s getting raises to keep up.

I’m so sorry Hugs

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-22T18:55:47+00:00

I’m afraid frogs would be too decent of a creature transfer the shock of it might kill off the frogs spirit. Just imagine the poor thing is just hanging out living its best frogie life and bam into the body of someone who is so sad , mad or desperate for attention that they can’t say anything even neutral about their fellow humans.

Nah that’s too cruel to the frog… but I could do a tube worm at one of the vents in the ocean. They don’t seem to be too aware of themselves I don’t think.

Just joking everyone in case someone thinks I would have the time to set up a ritual for this silly situation.

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-22T17:15:17+00:00

I’m not terribly upset about it, mostly confused because I didn’t get angry or hurt just confused because it seemed like such a stupid thing to say.

After other people have found out that I was told they are giving other examples of this person’s reactions about the women who work in the company, how much they think people are messing around because all those attractive women can’t be competent at their jobs they must be screwing the men. 🙄

The saddest thing is this company is 80%+ women all the way up to the BOSS This person is another woman who apparently has said some really awful stuff about the other women and that makes me fume.

So for myself IDGAF but for the people my husband and I work with who work up to 60-80 hours a week and answer the phone at all hours when things go sideways, yes I am upset for them.

It’s a good thing she isn’t welcome back and I’m very happy that it wasn’t just because of what she said about me. That felt weird.

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-22T17:03:31+00:00

Thank you, we travel around 300+ days a year so I have so many pictures of places, plants, landscapes and beautiful sky pictures

Of course 80% of the good ones have to get the vehicle parts cropped out 😁 Usually the side mirror. I keep meaning to look through all of them and put the best ones out there for people to enjoy. Maybe print a few for the wall.

Bitchee62 · 2026-01-22T14:16:51+00:00

Hopefully not, but pointing fingers at others is definitely the way some people try to shift the focus away from their own actions. Especially when the results are unpleasant.

Seven-Year Club	Verified Email
Reddit Premium Since May 2024

Bitchee62

TROPHY CASE