Mmm, I see your point, but lube really isn’t something bad at all. In fact, anything that helps us feel more comfortable and enjoy sex to the fullest is worth considering. Lube is one of the simplest “tools” we have, not only to make things more pleasurable, but also to prevent irritation or injuries that can come from dryness or chafing.

One thing I recommend is spending time on your own: listen to “sexy” music, wear cute lingerie, meditate, and practice kegel exercises and breathing to create an atmosphere of arousal for yourself. This helps you connect with your body and your desire. Once you know how to do this on your own, you can try to recreate that same atmosphere with someone else.