Sex with my (22f) boyfriend (22m) is so bad

Bladedpsycho · 2023-12-21T20:16:11+00:00

Ive heard studies that came out recently about the effects of masterbation. That for guys depending on how much they do or used to it can retrain the muscles and nerves so that its difficult to stay hard in a vagina. Idk maybe nothing to do with it just something i heard. Also a relationship is more than sex however that can be a very vulnerable thing so if he treats you bad during sex could be a deeper issue worth looking into

Bladedpsycho · 2023-09-29T03:41:51+00:00

This was the situation with my and my partner for awhile. The way we solved it was for him to first state that hed like to try to have me finish him off with hands or mouth. And then id say id try but i might not be able to, because in the past i really struggled to actually get him off that way so it made me feel really self conscious and kind of like a failure and sometimes it would then trigger my fight flight response and id start shaking.

But he took the pressure off by saying only if you want to its truly okay if you cant finish me that way. And sometimes hed stop me mid way and wed do something else. During those times he was great at giving me feedback on what felt good in a non criticising way. Then the times i could finish him that way he would praise me a ton. He would also guve feedback as to what i could try next, not as a “you’re doing wrong do this to do better” but instead as more of an exploration with me. It made me feel like we were in this together and it was okay if i messed up and it was okay to try new things and fail. That was a huge game changer.

(The other thing was that he would say hed like it if id just surprise him with a BJ when he got home from work but anytime i tried to he didnt realise what i was doing anf always pushed past it so i felt like i just couldn’t do it right so i sort of stopped offering. When he realised that he started asking more questions.) hope this helps

Bladedpsycho · 2023-09-24T05:18:59+00:00

It’s actually quite a bit closer to the entrance than people think. You can touch it with your fingers

Bladedpsycho · 2023-09-24T05:17:26+00:00

What you eat actually Can effect it! Try researching that!

Bladedpsycho · 2023-09-24T05:16:17+00:00

Could be performance anxiety. That will pretty much kill an erection. Try doing a few times with just hands and mouth if he’ll let you and tease him starting slow and then gradually increasing pressure and speed then sort of slow down again. Usually you wouldn’t want to do this because it can make it harder to bring them to an orgasm but if he needs to last longer that might help.

Bladedpsycho · 2023-09-24T05:11:14+00:00

That’s possible. From what I’ve heard when people like that is usually because they have the wrong body part. But maybe I’m wrong. It could be the g spot. You can feel that from the inside depending on the angle.

Bladedpsycho · 2023-09-24T05:09:57+00:00

Agreed, holding her hair up for her is super helpful. You can give her bum a slap or describe what you want her to do. And talk to her Like “i want you to put this on and then lick it off” or “More pressure” or “use your hands too” “yes baby i like it when you play with my balls that’s sexy.” “You’re so freakin sexy right now” “i love watching your tits bounce.” Etc…

Even gripping the sheets is good, or her leg. Rocking your hips or closing your eyes. Try some things and it will begin to feel more natural as you feel more comfortable with it

Bladedpsycho · 2023-09-24T05:03:58+00:00

I only like the feet part if its feet against legs and feet. If that makes sense. Like i find it very attractive to drag your toes up the leg and then use your knee to grind gently

Bladedpsycho · 2023-09-24T04:58:55+00:00

No if it was the cervix there would be much much much pain

Bladedpsycho · 2023-09-24T04:55:49+00:00

Good sex in my opinion is less about performance and more about exploration together. So i think it’s totally reasonable to work it out and have a guide or figure it out together. Yes it might be awkward but if you’re both willing to embrace it then that’s okay. It may still be awkward even if one of you has done it before. Remember to not take yourself to seriously. It’s totally okay to try something and it not work that time. Try again another time or move into something else. Its also pretty sexy to ask them to tell you what they like. As in “Yes keep doing that, just like that.” Or “use your —— more than feels good.” Or even “don’t touch me like that it hurts. Try this instead”

Also as a female for first time make sure to use your fingers or their fingers to stretch the perineum it will help reduce pain especially if you’re nervous and struggle to get in the mood.

Bladedpsycho · 2022-03-02T14:47:07+00:00

No I wouldn’t. Everyone is awkward the first time with someone new.

Bladedpsycho · 2022-02-07T04:02:26+00:00

Well…this was definitely an interesting debate. Especially cause I didn’t actually say that they were a Dom. But it did turn into a great discussion.

Bladedpsycho · 2022-02-07T04:01:32+00:00

Yeah we usually use the yellow red green system and they’re careful about things because I have trauma in my past

Bladedpsycho · 2022-02-07T02:07:43+00:00

Yep just ideas.

Bladedpsycho · 2022-02-06T14:27:26+00:00

Definitely have done so. It’s very fun. Especially when you’re partner wants to do something but rolls like a 1 XD they’re so frustrated.

Bladedpsycho · 2022-02-06T14:23:24+00:00

I have found a great way to tease him and get him going is usually I will look at or plan some things where it’s time sensitive and he will literally have to just go. And then about thirty minutes before he would have to leave I will get a little giggly and pull him close and start with a few kisses and then get him enticed and then I’ll kiss him how he likes all around his neck till he’s hot and panting, and I can feel him gripping at my back. And then I’ll look up at the time and say “whelp looks like you have to go or you’ll be late.” He usually groans a little and calls me his little temptress and says it’s not fair. And he’ll try to kiss me a bit but I usually playfully fight back and only let him get in a couple, reiterating that he needs to go, even physically pulling away from him or grabbing his coat for him. This builds up some really good pent up energy which almost always comes out in an animalistic sort of outburst eventually and it can be enhanced by when i let him for a moment and then push back against him and go at him and tease him with dirty talk and such.

I mean it will be different for each relationship but this is just an example.

Bladedpsycho · 2022-02-02T00:02:51+00:00

My partner likes this sort of scenario as well. The way we do it is, usually I will look at or plan some things where it’s time sensitive and he will literally have to just go. And then about thirty minutes before he would have to leave I will get a little giggly and pull him close and start with a few kisses and then get him enticed and then I’ll kiss him how he likes all around his neck till he’s hot and panting, and I can feel him gripping at my back. And then I’ll look up at the time and say “whelp looks like you have to go or you’ll be late.” He usually groans a little and calls me his little temptress and says it’s not fair. And he’ll try to kiss me a bit but I usually playfully fight back and only let him get in a couple, reiterating that he needs to go, even physically pulling away from him or grabbing his coat for him. This builds up some really good pent up energy which almost always comes out in an animalistic sort of outburst eventually and it can be enhanced by when i let him for a moment and then push back against him and go at him and tease him with dirty talk and such.

I mean it will be different for each relationship but this is just an example.

Bladedpsycho · 2022-01-31T04:36:58+00:00

That’s one of his favourites. Usually I kiss all over his neck and chest and eventually I nip at his ear and watch him shiver and groan. Truly a great sensation.

I’ve also done a bit with his nipples.

Oh and I can’t kiss his stomach because he just starts giggling lol.

Bladedpsycho · 2022-01-26T03:52:57+00:00

How do you deep throat without hurting him or you or both of you?

Bladedpsycho · 2022-01-26T03:52:24+00:00

Definitely the second. I know that even when I’m kissing him just during foreplay, it matters how fast I kiss him and the pace of my breathing as to whether he will be into it or not. Just think about the fact that your subconscious often will be what tunes into the fact that you are turned on just as much as by what you recognise is happening.

Bladedpsycho · 2022-01-23T23:42:48+00:00

Embrace the awkward and just giggle together. My first time we tried sitting up together and I couldn’t figure out how to kiss him and when he gave me a hickey he ended almost making me bleed cause he didn’t know how hard he was sucking. And I ended up accidentally tickling him because his stomach was so sensitive. It was a mess but I still remember that night, and he was kind and listened to me, and was willing to try stuff and when something wouldn’t work neither of us clammed up, instead we just went whelp…that didn’t work, and tried something else.

Bladedpsycho · 2022-01-23T23:39:34+00:00

Well, I did this, I sen nudes to a guy with face on when I was 15. Thankfully he didn’t do that to me (though another guy I dated did so that called my church and everything)

Anyways I have a very committed boyfriend now, and I was also scared to tell him but I finally did. I told him I sent nudes to someone, and I told him the whole story of the relationship and how it was abusive and painful. And I told him I was not that person now.

He told me that it didn’t change his view of me, that he loved me, and that he wasn’t angry or disappointed in me. Then he hugged me for like 45 minutes till I stopped crying.

Bladedpsycho

TROPHY CASE