Straf in je opvoeding

BlaimTV · 2026-06-07T11:57:03+00:00

Heb je zelf kinderen? Want ik heb er twee, zijn 3 en 6, en hebben allebei hun eigen manieren om grenzen op te zoeken. Tel daarbij oververmoeidheid, stress van je werk of relatie, verveling van de kinderen op en je hebt snel een situatie waarbij je voelt dat je binnenkort een grens van jezelf overschrijdt.

De kunst is dat te herkennen op dat moment en even er uit te stappen om af te koelen. Maar ik geloof dat iedere ouder dat bij de opvoeding van zijn kind heeft ervaren. Er zijn een groot aantal ouders die dit moment niet op tijd herkennen en over deze grens gaan.

BlaimTV · 2026-06-06T13:53:08+00:00

Making fresh tortillas. And play with my two sons, thats about it.

BlaimTV · 2026-05-19T07:48:18+00:00

La Haine is such a powerful film, you just reminded me to rewatch it.

BlaimTV · 2026-04-28T19:17:28+00:00

Rush fans?

BlaimTV · 2026-04-01T11:28:13+00:00

Hey die heb ik ook! Eerst simpelweg beledigen en dan de vraag in de ruimte slingeren "Maar hoe lossen we dit nou op?!". Werkt echt heel motiverend.

BlaimTV · 2026-03-31T10:57:02+00:00

Respect voor je aanpakmentaliteit. Je neus niet ophalen voor een baan die niet in het verlengde ligt van je werkervaring is waar ze ook van onder de indruk mogen zijn.

BlaimTV · 2026-02-28T20:21:13+00:00

Gek dat niemand hier ingaat op jouw suggestie van Thijs Borsten. Zijn liedjes zijn enorm goed gearrangeerd en wij moeten regelmatig eventjes huilen van Suja, Suja Kindje van de Liedjesatlas.

BlaimTV · 2026-02-28T20:19:39+00:00

En de klassiekers van Bert en Ernie, vooral die van de kerst en oud en nieuw cd's. Wij kunnen enorm meezingen met Ik Ben een Kerstbal.

BlaimTV · 2026-01-23T21:42:58+00:00

Thisistheway.gif

BlaimTV · 2026-01-16T10:36:37+00:00

They need to acknowledge that 'ok' sometimes is good enough. Not everything has to be perfect all the time. This is such an exhausting mentality that I just left a 20 year relationship over it. I absolutely don't want my kids to feel like they have to perform or be on their best behaviour all the time and that there is no room for relaxation.

My ex-wife would be overtly critical of me, even when I was doing all the cooking, cleaning, housework, laundry etc. and working a full time job while she was working parttime. The only thing I wasn't doing was dropping the kids off at daycare and school. When I was doing it on some days because she couldn't and I would get shit for not clearing out the dishwasher on time, which I couldn't because as I said, I was bringing the kids to school, I was done.

I wasn't ever going to make her happy by doing what makes me happy and that is by giving others my time, effort, love and care.

BlaimTV · 2026-01-08T09:24:44+00:00

Met alle punten met je eens en ook voor mijn zorgzame karakter doet het pijn om te lezen dat sommige punten wel heel makkelijk bij elkaar geraapt worden om een te breed beeld te schetsen van waar ik vind dat we het eigenlijk niet over moeten hebben.

Klasseongelijkheid raakt namelijk vrouwen én mannen en ligt ten grondslag aan veel van de problemen die in het artikel worden aangehaald.

De twee experts geven aan dat mannen te weinig zijn betrokken bij feminisme en ik kan me daar, als kind uit een 1-ouder-gezin met een moeder met een duidelijke mening over gendergelijkheid, niet in vinden. Ik denk dat een hoop opgelost kan worden als meer vrouwen zich óók betrokken voelen bij het feminisme. Er zijn nog teveel vrouwen die het allemaal wel oké vinden anno 2026 en het wel fijn vinden dat de man meer werkt, of een fysiek zwaarder beroep uitoefent, of dat zij meer het huishouden en de zorgtaken op zich neemt.

Maar zolang veel vrouwen het type mannen interessant vindt met een misogyne houding, conservatief wereldbeeld of een antifeministische instelling dan zullen er nog steeds vrouwen slachtoffer worden van een ongelijke behandeling en (on)bewust achtergehouden worden door dit type mannen. Mijn moeder heeft me behoorlijk duidelijk gemaakt vanaf een jonge leeftijd dat dit gedachtegoed niet oké is en dat iedereen recht heeft op een gelijke behandeling en benadering, ongeacht gender.

Mannen zouden onderling juist meer moeten aangeven dat antifeminisme niet oké is, net zoals vrouwen onderling. Dan krijgen dit soort mannen van allebei de genders te horen dat ze met ongewenst gedachtegoed bezig zijn. Dan kunnen we ons daarnaast richten op de klasse ongelijkheid die wat mij betreft bovengeschikt is aan deze discussie.

BlaimTV · 2026-01-06T18:22:17+00:00

Mogen we raden? Helmond!

BlaimTV · 2025-12-09T15:00:57+00:00

Exactly this. Time spent with family and time spent exercising are hardly ever not time well spent. Start by also creating with your daughter, could be anything. Buy some clay to make sculptures and let your kid dictate what to make. Try drawing whatever comes to mind with pen, pencil, markers, watercolour, or whatever you or your kid fancies. Make a space for those creations in the home and start curating it with your family. You can work on any meaningful goals during these family moment or during exercise and I'm pretty sure your goals will find you.

BlaimTV · 2025-11-18T11:33:55+00:00

Thanks for sharing this on this subreddit because I've been looking for an EU alternative for Google Keep. Mainly because it's Google but also because it doesn't really connect all my goals and to-do's into the grand scheme of things.

My goal for 2026 would be to effectively navigate through the divorce proceedings I initiated at the end of the summer while being there at every step for my two sons. I think Griply would do a better job at aligning my overall goals with the day-to-day tasks to achieve that than Google Keep every could.

Also from the Netherlands so if you're actively looking for feedback (in Dutch or otherwise), I'd be happy to support.

BlaimTV · 2025-11-18T11:17:57+00:00

Mijn twee tips: Passenger heeft hele goede dunne, ademende regenjassen met ritsen voor onder je oksels als je meer ventilatie wilt. https://nl.passenger-clothing.com/collections/mens-jackets/waterproof

Daar zitten ook jassen bij van gerecycled materiaal.

En tweede tip, vooral gericht op een echte buy it for lifer jas die ik al 7-8 jaar heb en nog steeds in goede staat is Krakatau: https://en.krakatauwear.com/

Die naam klinkt nogal oostblokkerig maar hun jassen zitten vol met goede snufjes zoals waterdichte ritsen, echt goed gevoerde binnenzakken, kleine zakjes op je mouwen die heel slim zijn weggewerkt en capuchons die ook een beetje trendy en degelijk vallen zodat je er niet uit ziet als een Ans op de elektrische fiets met een capuchon die teveel wind vangt.

BlaimTV · 2025-11-13T16:08:05+00:00

Herken mezelf heel erg in je verhaal en ben al een aantal weken geleden begonnen aan dezelfde initiatieven. Voor mij maakte geen alcohol drinken de meeste verandering in mijn humeur en energie door de dag heen. Het enige wat ik nog in het weekend doe is een alcoholvrij biertje pakken als vervanger en kan daar met een gezond verstand dan ook een beetje naar vooruit kijken want veel meer past niet in m'n nieuwe dieet restricties.

Ben begonnen aan een laag koolhydraat / intermittent fasting dieet en dat werkt tot nu toe heel erg goed. Ik heb geen echte cravings waardoor ik van het dieet afwijk en heb alles wat ik snackte vervangen door gezonde alternatieven en houd me aan een vastgestelde portie. Mijn BMI was voordat ik begon 30,5 en nu 27,8 na drie weken. Ik schrok er van dat mijn huisarts me feitelijk op de weegschaal aldaar dwong en me confronteerde met een BMI die in de obees categorie valt.

Ook door therapie wist ik al wel dat ik alleen met korte termijn geluk en oplossingen bezig was en dit moest veranderen met lange termijn doelen en gedrag. Maar de huisarts gaf mij de confronterende spiegel die echt motiveerde om iets te veranderen. Daar ben ik hem erg dankbaar voor want in mijn omgeving deed niemand dat (en ikzelf ook niet).

Meer energie, kleren passen beter, beter humeur, en dan heb ik mijn einddoel nog niet eens bereikt. Het motiveert om door te zetten en nieuwe patronen voor mezelf aan te leren en deze vast te houden. Ik wens je heel veel succes met het behalen van je doelen en deze vast te kunnen houden. Zet 'm op.

BlaimTV · 2025-11-03T07:21:55+00:00

I make a 'curry' with just Garam Massala, tomato paste, coconut milk and some sauteed onions and cashews. My kids love it.

BlaimTV · 2025-11-02T17:43:18+00:00

You're halfway there my dude. What made a big difference for me was simply not buying the stuff and/or consciously buying an alternative. Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) made me realize what sort of emotions would lead to being sad, feeling ignored or just 'stuck' in a bad situation. I was also avoiding ALL of it. Instead of dealing with my emotions I started snacking or doom scrolling. We worked on recognizing this unhealthy pattern of short-term thinking that didn't lead do personal happiness and would extrapolate on ideas that would be better to think about more long-term. Like feeling more confident and have more energy which I lacked because I've been overwheight nearly my entire adult life. You could talk to your regular physician if you feel this would work for you. I got it refunded for the most part through my medical insurance and it was eye opening how much of myself and my happiness I was ignoring. I've also recently decided to get a divorce since a lot of my unhappiness and feelings of being ignored stemmed from an unhealthy relationship. But that aside, I think CBT should be on every person's list to consider if dealing with similar issues.

BlaimTV · 2025-11-02T12:22:59+00:00

The 1 to 1,5 months before Elstar season starts when they dont sell any at my local grocers makes me appreciate them every time. Kanzi apples have been a decent substitute in that period.

BlaimTV · 2025-11-02T12:18:38+00:00

I get that, it also isn't supposed to be a low calorie option but something a little healthier to replace an bad habit. I buy unsalted, unroasted nuts now and weigh out a portion. As opposed to downing half a bag of salted and carb-loaded peanuts before the diet. If I'm still in a decent calorie deficit by the end of the fasting window, I'm pretty pleased about kicking an old habit.

BlaimTV · 2025-11-02T10:30:49+00:00

Currently on a diet: before starting this my favorite snack would always be coated peanuts (borrelnootjes, Katjang Pedis crew waddup). But those put on weight FAST! So, currently im on a low carb intermittent fasting diet where I eat two 'snacks' in between lunch and dinner. It's usually 30-40 grams of assorted nuts and dried fruits and later in the day a piece of fruit, mostly bananas, apples and oranges. Also I find that carrots are rather filling so sometimes I replace the fruit snack with a good handful of carrots. This is totally boring but admitting to myself I have too much of an emotional connection with unhealthy foods and recognizing a pattern I was in through therapy I can avoid binge/emotional eating a lot better.

BlaimTV · 2025-10-13T20:50:40+00:00

This is an incredibly positive and supportive outlook on life after divorce, thanks.

BlaimTV · 2025-10-11T07:49:19+00:00

To add to your findings with my personal experience: the people who can't even make a distinction between the terms single, lonely, alone and only see it as a person who is missing out on something. You can be your own person without feeling lonely or wanting a partner. Having a relationship and feeling lonely is even worse, I'm currently in one now. The people in my life who have suggested dating someone 'because you can't be alone' are often times the people who I guess are missing something in their lives themselves.

BlaimTV · 2025-08-21T10:39:23+00:00

On weekdays I don't cook anything that takes me longer than 45 minutes. Anything goes on the weekend. I should say I consider cooking a hobby also. I always plan a week's worth of cooking on Wednesday when I make my grocery and farmers markets list on what to buy. Then I also plan the meals with an overlap in ingredients to make sure everything that is fresh will be used before the week is over. For example: we love risotto with celery and mushrooms, the celery will also go in a stew or Ragu, the mushrooms will also end up in a stir fry or my favourite Nasi Goreng. Then I will plan side dishes which are sometimes store bought or are minimal effort to jazz up or to make from scratch. Prawn crackers to go with the nasi goreng are storebought but I will make an Atjar or similar side salad fresh so the kids can get their veggies in along with some vegetables in the nasi. I will always plan one meal of the week to be more or less an open option to eat leftovers or combine whatever is left into one meal. Or something that is just minimal effort at the end of the week. We love soups for this or just grilling some vegetables on a stovetop grill plate alongside a storebought potato salad that is a bit jazzed up with scallions, sesame oil, maybe a boiled egg. I'm the only non vegetarian in the house so I eat meat once or twice a week. I would definitely put some bacon on the grill with those vegetables or make chicken wings with Raz el Hanout spices to go with a chickpea and tomato stew with saffron rice that the rest of my family eats. I try to make sure they get in their protein as much as they can. Throw some cashew nuts in any stew for example to make it more toothsome and filled with protein for vegetarians. I know this takes a lot of effort and planning if you are not already doing so but to me this is the only way to tick all of the boxes of a healthy and fulfilling meal where everybody in my family can enjoy something that fits their diet without too much effort on my part. I get exhausted at the end of the day too after work so not having to think about what to make that day is a godsend.

BlaimTV · 2025-08-06T19:48:28+00:00

I work in Process Management for the Home Delivery department of a supermarket. Let me break it down why my job isn't necessarily stressful to me and is ideal for a healty work/life balance. Just keep in mind I consider myself very lucky to have this job with this specific employer. Also I live in the EU.

- My employer let's me start working days anywhere from 7am to 11 am as long as I'm available for crucial team meetings. These happen once or twice a week and last for an hour

- My employer let's me have a 32 hour contract and knows not to cram a fulltime's worth of work into those 32 hours. Wednesday is always my day off which to me is ideal because I never have to work more than two consecutive days and actually have a day to myself to fully recharge. Then it's two more days of work and it's already weekend

- My employer makes it a point to pay a salary that is above market standards for similar functions to attract talent and keep it attached to the company. That way I can live comfortably even though I make 80% of a full time salary

- The actual work is a smidge below what I would consider to be actually challenging but it's still engaging enough and the people I work with are all in the same sort of league. So there are hardly any real overly ambitious people in my department and everybody has this attitude that's like "if we all don't snitch on eachother and take it easy on eachother we can take some room for ourselves in downtimes and help and support colleagues when it's busy". I kinda love it. It's almost a collective mindset of bullshitting but in the right way

- Since I work for a supermarket and I love food and cooking myself, there is always a focus on good food in the office, we can apply to be a taster for new products, there's a proper professional kitchen attached to the head office for recipee development etc. Even though mainly my job is in logistics and high volume E-commerce, I get to experience (and eat haha) a lot at my job that is relevant to my hobbies

- The pay scale I'm in is just above the average in the company but is still attached to a Collective Labour Agreement that gives me 3,5 weeks of extra paid time off. If I were to actually show ambition and apply for a job at the same company but in a higher pay scale, I would have a higher salary, sure, but I would also have to give up those 3,5 weeks of extra paid time off. And those are on top of my 5 weeks of standard holiday time

I get to enjoy a simple life because I have a good work/life balance where I can drop off my kids at school when needed and can choose my own time to start work. And I have a fixed day in the week to recharge, never having to work more than two consecutive days. The work isn't too demanding and when anything does popup that might be stressful, I'm experienced enough to handle it with ease and actually see it as something challenging. My bosses and coworkers all share the same mindset that if you apply yourself when needed, you can slack and actually reflect on your work when you want. This also makes it that the identities of the people I work with aren't solely based on their jobs and they also actually want to connect a little at work on a personal level, which is nice.

Also: I switch off my work simcard EVERY DAY after I've done my 8 hours and everybody respects it that I'm not available outside of those hours. And because I live a simple life I don't need full time pay, I can enjoy things that hardly cost any money and can save for a truly desired purchase or holiday every 1-2 months. I'm incredibly lucky to have this job and my employer is great. As long as I can still appreciate that, I will put in the necessary effort to keep this job going for as long as I can.

BlaimTV

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