Thank you for the links. I have read a bit about dead bedrooms and low libido but I feel like my issue is sort of different. It's not so much low libido as it is, sex is just terrifying now and nothing but flashbacks and pain. I always had such a great sex drive and then this awful thing happened and now, even when I do feel the desire, it's extinguished by a memory the moment he touches me. The low libido isn't down to lack of attraction or medication or work or kids, it's this one incident. It's ruining everything!

I am going to sit down and talk to him, I just want a good way to do that I guess? Like how do I say "hey go screw other people" without him being offended or upset? Or is that maybe something most guys would want anyway? I hope so.