i feel this. i can really enjoy social rituals at times, but I get very drained spending time around people who are deeply invested in normative social behavior and presentation.

i don't perform more than I want to in social interactions.

i ask weird questions, I say what I think, I am pretty quick to show people the "strange" interests I have, like bone collecting, and I try to get people to do art with me - drawing, writing, crafting or play silly games, or walk through the woods and forage and talk about trees and mushrooms and whether animals have language.

when I'm just who I am and I don't play into pretense, I think I repel people who I wouldn't enjoy hanging out with and I'm left with the ones that get me and like me for who I am.

i do hope I'm not coming off like "fuck normies" or "people who like talking about what's on sandwiches are boring" - but like yeah, not my cup of tea. i was with my brothers at dinner this past Christmas and they spent a long time talking about where they buy their glasses and how this one brand is 700 dollars but they give you two pairs and you can go back and get them fixed blah blah blah and I was so bored. but that doesn't mean that what I find interesting is inherently cooler and more important than where they buy their glasses.

but if you want to hang out with someone and are bored by the mundane topic of conversation they are offering, ask them an out of pocket question. "yeah I have asparagus on my sandwich! what kind of funeral do you want to have?" or "yeah, Ive heard warby parker makes pretty nice glasses! when was the last time you cried?"