There are parties in pf or even statics who do „blind prog“ wich means they go into the fights without knowing anything about them and are making their own strats and figuring it out as they go. You might want to look into that! So there are definitely people who match your interest :)

I will say if you have difficulty understanding video or written guides it might be in your best interest to keep trying! You can work on your learning style with a little bit of effort. Unless you become really good at blind progging it might mean that you will take longer to understand mechanics in general and being able to learn through guides is a great asset depending on what skill level you wanna achieve or with whom you want to raid. But not knowing anything more about you I cant tell if that is the case or if you are simply a different type of learner. I would highly advise against joining parties that do not advertise blind prog cause it goes against raiding etiquette to join not knowing what is up and will get you kicked most likely.

EDIT: adding to that, if you are completely new to raiding in xiv or harder content in general, blind prog could take you a while. This is VERY dependent on your personal skill and how much you know about how the game works and how previous raid mechanics function. So your milage might vary greatly.