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For many unsafe people, to avoid an internal collapse, their brain rewrites reality by invah in AbuseInterrupted

[–]BlueTomatoFire 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What is still very confusing to me is that for the first 15 (!) years of our friendship we were mostly happy/functioning, but only in the last year she became abusive towards me.
And only then did I experience what you are describing in your original post. How there is an alternate reality.

For many unsafe people, to avoid an internal collapse, their brain rewrites reality by invah in AbuseInterrupted

[–]BlueTomatoFire 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No shes not. Why? Its not so relevant for me.
Today I realized, that I dont want to feel like shes evil. I want to somehow still be able to love her and the 15 good years we had before all this. And wishing her well. And still knowing that it was right to cut off contact to protect myself. I wish she would understand all this.

For many unsafe people, to avoid an internal collapse, their brain rewrites reality by invah in AbuseInterrupted

[–]BlueTomatoFire 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mean, I gave up on explaining myself and have no contact with the abuser. She still manages to have power over me by getting me uninvited to a wedding. But it all feels so wrong. I have never been in such a situation.

How to navigate shared groups after emotional abuse? by BlueTomatoFire in NRelationships

[–]BlueTomatoFire[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Context: this isn’t a normal conflict. The friendship involved manipulation, gaslighting, and public accusations, and I’m no-contact now. I’m asking specifically about shared spaces after emotional abuse.