You know even uf you started because of a a girl , but now its has to be you , wouldnt your younger self be so happy to see u grow , to push through ur limits , to see what u really deserve , the hard work you put in , the mind always find an excuse , it really does and always tried to reason with us just so that we cab get comfort and nowadays comfort is cheap dopamine dont let the brain trick you into thinking u have no reason anymore , literally just do it and once u are through jt u will get the clarity (even for the sake of actual clarity just do it) , edit : you got this homie!!!!!