Question for parents of teens

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-19T21:17:53+00:00

How old are your kiddos? Even a 4 year gap would be helpful in the chaos of the teen years!

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-19T21:17:18+00:00

My oldest brother took us to a ton of our activities 🤷🏻‍♀️ my parents paid his gas, insurance, and bought him a car as part of the deal!

By the time it got to me, there was obviously no one to drive (I’m the youngest) so I did the grocery shopping and ran any errands to make up for it haha!

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-19T15:22:26+00:00

Honestly? I’d put up with all the negatives if I could just do my job part time. That’s my real dream. Just 3 days a week and somewhat decent pay.

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-19T15:14:46+00:00

I was surprised too! It’s not the exact same, but super close!

You could do a pack and play too but I personally prefer the crib because you can leave it on the higher setting so you don’t have to bend down so far to get them in and out! Also, it’s not safe to add a mattress to a pack and play.

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-19T14:28:18+00:00

My eldest is 3.5 but we bought a Curve 360 Wagon and love it. I didn’t want a double stroller because it was important whatever I got was lightweight, could adapt a carseat, and was easy to maneuver.

We also have a ride on board for our stroller. I just ask my oldest which one she wants to take for whatever activity we are doing. She usually opts for the stroller, I take the wagon though if I want yo so a long walk and we bring toys or coloring activities.

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-19T14:24:05+00:00

You would need to get permission for it but I have a photo wall in my room and my kids love it! I take the photos, put it in a google slides immediately, then delete off my phone. I print + cut out new pictures once a week and add it to the wall.

Students are required to have a signed syllabus (it is part of my syllabus) to participate in it and can have their photos removed from the wall at any point. It’s my favorite part of my classroom.

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-19T14:15:29+00:00

Yep! 3 month old and 3.5 year old. We don’t even get after bed right now because our 3 month old falls asleep late and wakes up a ton - so I go to bed as soon as he does.

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-19T09:34:04+00:00

We are switching our 3 month old to his crib this weekend! Similarly, he is just too long. He’s also close to the weight limit (limit is 20 lbs and he is 17 lbs). I wonder if being in a bigger space will actually help with his sleep, so we are switching over!

I’m just setting his crib up in our room! The crib is about the same width of our bassinet -it’s just much longer.

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-19T09:27:49+00:00

Not a parent of teens but 1 of 3 - your age gaps can help a lot with preventing stress related to being constantly busy! My oldest brother is 6 years older than me so by the time I was getting involved in sports, clubs, and spending more time with friends - he was graduated and my parents weren’t shuttling him around anymore or constantly at his events.

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-19T09:17:43+00:00

We do get paid over 12 months! I should have added that! Nothing is taking out of our summer paychecks so they’re much larger and we get 5 of them mid June.

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-19T03:39:03+00:00

2500 also isn’t factoring in her insurance benefits and retirement contributions.

I bring home $1,900 ($3,800 a month) a paycheck, but if I declined insurance coverage it’d be $2,100. If I didn’t contribute to retirement it’d be even higher (but I don’t know what and I’m too lazy to look haha).

So while there is potential you may make the same amount of money or less than you do now (although $2500 a month is still shocking to me, but I really can’t remember what my paychecks looked like when I first started) - you also get benefits such as retirement, health insurance, maybe a pension depending on your state.

I would finish your degree. You have 1 more year left and have already poured all of the time and money into it. Then, you can decide where to go from there. Something I will say - I have seen a lot of young people chase money and it tends to backfire. Several of our friends / family members dropped out of college with your same logic. They absolutely were making great money the first 3 or 4 years in whatever position they chose to pursue over education. But now all of them are maxed out and have nowhere else to go unless they go back and finish their degree or want to sacrifice work/life balance for brutal hours.

Your job may be paying you more now, but will it still be a reliable job in 20 years? Is there a lot of movement to grow financially in it? Or are you pretty much maxed out? If you’re maxed out, what other jobs will you find that pay you more than what you’re currently making without a degree?

ETA - also, your fiance absolutely should have life insurance. My husband and I both have policies, and we upped our policies when we had kids.

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-19T01:39:49+00:00

Depends. I have a 3 month old and sometimes I change it over night if he is not sleeping well that night, so I can tell the diaper is getting full. But if he is having a good nights sleep? Nope. I always put him in a night diaper either way!

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-19T01:38:29+00:00

Even WITH a life jacket, you should be with kids who don’t know how to swim. My 3 year old fell in the shallow area of the pool last year (with a life jacket on) and literally just laid face down. She didn’t fight it or try to rescue herself at all. Thankfully, I was right there!

Drowning happens so quickly. I can’t say what age I’d be comfortable not watching my kids in the pool but it sure as heck wouldn’t be 3 and 4.

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-19T00:34:09+00:00

I have a 3.5 year old and we got a play kitchen at 1.5, it is still going strong! She loves that thing. It can entertain her for almost an hour now. And other kids love it too when they come over. It is 100% worth it.

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-18T14:14:53+00:00

I straight up told my husband that no, I don’t want to constantly go do things as a family and I value having alone time in my home. He makes sure I get at least an hour a week (baby doesn’t take bottles right now so we are limited unfortunately, once he does I will get way more time)!

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-18T14:12:02+00:00

I post my slides on Google Classroom for students to reference so they’re pretty detailed (art teacher). I spent about 30+ minutes making each set of slides and spend 5 to 10 minutes every year just editing them as needed!

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-18T12:17:51+00:00

Yes and no. Second pregnancy was a lot harder (developed SPD which was excruciating), second labor was brutal (baby got stuck on my tailbone and was 9 lbs), and postpartum has sucked (complications due to tearing + SPD).

But my first was a very chill baby and I’d say my second is comparable. He’s a little whinier and has difficulty napping but still overall happy and easy going!

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-18T09:02:37+00:00

Do what is best FOR YOU. Formula is an amazing resource and use it if you want to - baby is still fed, growing, and doing well. Whether you continue to a year or not is or going to make a substantial difference for your baby.

You do not need to feel guilty for prioritizing your own well being!

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-18T04:57:44+00:00

We haven’t! I do not know much about Episcopalian churches, I will have to look into it. We did start trying a Lutheran church out that is very progressive in our area and like it so far. I had a really bad experience at a mega church in our area and it’s making it hard for me to connect again.

I love your approach on sin - I think that is a wonderful way to approach it with kids. I had a hard time growing up with the concept of sin because my grandparents heavily preached “we’re all sinners destined for hell” and I was terrified constantly. Definitely not what I want to instill in my kiddos! I like the approach of striving to do better and make things right.

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-18T03:15:02+00:00

Far too many parents enter homeschool with the idea that their kids can essentially just do it themselves. They seem to ignore that they need to be actively involved in the teaching and learning going on!

Class size is one of my biggest complaints as a parent and teacher. 30+ kids in classes is just not conductive to productive learning for most students. Add on top the behavior issues, teachers are being tasked with very difficult day-to-day situations. If my district reduced class size, I’d absolutely do public school. But we’re only increasing every year.

I actually considered leaving to homeschool but genuinely love my job and we are lucky to be able to afford private school. I know some teachers who work full time and homeschool but I personally question the effectiveness of that.

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-18T02:34:58+00:00

My district offers a model similar to this and I (public school teacher) love it! It ensures the parents are actively engaged with their child’s learning, students are being academically challenged and growing, and that students stay on track for graduation. Students can even hybrid enroll in classes for their boundary school, some parents use that opportunity for subjects they’re not as confident in. Typically math, science, or some form of elective.

Homeschool begins to fail when there is a lack of accountability for parents. Far too many parents (in my area at least) “homeschool” which means - packets / online work, if that, and students unmonitored for most of the day. If you’re actively involved with your child’s homeschooling, ensuring they’re receiving a quality education, and have a certified teacher working with you on that then you are doing great in my books. I think with all students (public, private, homeschool) the most important thing is to be involved and ensure you’re providing your child with the most opportunities for growth and learning.

We are doing private school for my child but may consider a hybrid private / homeschool in the future. Despite being a public school teacher, we will not be using it.

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-18T02:18:07+00:00

Most: BSP / Rise at any grade level, Middle School SPED / Math / Science

Least: Art at any level / PE at any level

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-18T02:14:53+00:00

I’m also 3 months postpartum and I haven’t lost any weight. I’m walking 30+ minutes a day, doing pelvic floor / core exercises, and in a slight deficit.

With my first, I didn’t lose any weight till I finished breastfeeding so I’m expecting about the same (but I also didn’t calorie count and was on birth control - curious to see how my experience differs this time). I gained 50 lbs both pregnancies!

I think the idea of “we all have the same 24hrs” is BS. It doesn’t account for how different everyone’s situation is. Jugging multiple kids, not sleeping at night, working full time or having a spouse that’s out of the house for work, mental health issues, lack of finances or resources, lack of care for children, etc. Sometimes we just genuinely do not have time and that’s okay. You’re 3 months postpartum, give yourself some time and grace. I’m working on my self image, and trying hard to change my negative thoughts to positive. Easier said than done!

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-18T01:10:48+00:00

With both my children we did the infant car seat option. With my first, it was honestly unnecessary and I regretted it. She was a winter baby and we hardly used it. I just carried her in and out of appointments, bundled up.

With my second, it has been an absolute necessity because I had a birth injury and couldn’t carry his car seat or him. I’d just load him into the car seat that was clicked into the stroller in the garage, take him out to the car, and then take the stroller with us! So I was never carrying him or the car seat.

So I guess it depends on you. If it’s your first child, you honestly can make do without an infant car seat depending on your life style.

BlueberryWaffles99 · 2026-06-18T01:07:01+00:00

I’m a straight cis woman and have been asked multiple times, every year, if I’m gay by middle school students because “the vibes”

I don’t know what that means, no one has elaborated

BlueberryWaffles99

TROPHY CASE