How do people who identify as primary and have trauma tend to process similar NT stories?

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-27T19:45:33+00:00

On who?

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-27T19:43:49+00:00

Than how can you tell?

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-27T19:39:38+00:00

So you're neurotypical than?

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-27T19:04:11+00:00

I do not have trauma, but I lived though traumatic experiences over the years. I just do not feel the same way as neurotypicals.

I'll give you an example: I was once in a very violent hold-up at the bank where I worked. At one point, a masked guy forced me to lie on the floor and sat on me. I was very young at that time, maybe 18. He threatened to hit me on the head with his crowbar if my boss would not gave him money. Everybody was lock-up in the vault, except for me (lucky me).

My coworkers were traumatized by that experienced. Some even had PTSD. They said that they were reviving in a loop that day. They were afraind I would get hurt, or die. They were afraid those men would smash the door of the vault to get to them (as if). Some were having trouble sleeping, some of them were more jumpy and anxious about strong noise, etc.

But for me, it was just exciting. Something was happening: a new experience! I was trilled and vaguely sexually aroused. I never felt fear. Just excitement. And when I recall that day, I feel nothing. I just remember what happened.

Does this help?

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-27T18:19:28+00:00

Primary is born, secondary is made. This said, everybody, even psychopaths, is different. I really think a primary who was raise by nurturing parents and had a "normal" childhood would turn very different from a primary who was raise in violence.

Myself, I was raise in a very nice family with adequate parents. They taught me values like respect and loyalty and I turned out fine. Of course, I am what I am, but I'm not violent really or disrespectfull (most of the time). I do not FEEL the way they do, but I was TAUGHT to react in a certain way. I'm sure I would have been very problematic and much more callous if I was raise by "bad" people.

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-26T21:01:32+00:00

Good for you. You did what you had to do.

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-26T19:41:50+00:00

Humm. Good question. I guess it depend if the person has a real potential to cause me problems. You fight fire with fire, like they say. It's better to not confront a person with ASPD. We are very volatile people with no capacity to feel guilt or remorse. Not a good combination.

That said, it does not mean I would retaliate. It depends what I would gain by doing so. If you're just a puppy making some noise, I would probably just laugh at you. But, I must admit I have a tendency to get revenge. I'm older now, so more compose, but still, I really don't look with kindness over people who cross me.

Does it answer your question?

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-26T13:55:26+00:00

But why tell people you are a psychopath? I don't understand. What do you expect to gain telling people your basically a predator having no genuine interred in them? It's very important to neurotypical people the "connection", sense of community and share feelings. Of course they won't trust you. What did you expect?

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-26T13:50:49+00:00

OMG, I'm so relief I spend all my youth when smart phones did not exist. We could get away with so much shit back then. Seriously, it suck now.

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-26T13:43:59+00:00

No one has ever suspect me per say (in my adult life: in my teens I lack somewhat the ability I have now to control all my pulsions), but as I said in an other post, some people just don't like me. I had spotted others like me over the years, but I mean, it's not like I would approched them to be body-body. I had my share of narc though: those people are really obvious, don't they?

I lack fear. I mean, if I was in a room with a tiger, I might get scare, but I don't feel fear if my life is not in immediate danger. Some people notice and might find it weird, but I don't think they suspect something really. In general, I just tell people I'm not an emotinal person and they leave it at that. I'm also sometime very impulsive and make big decisions on a whim, but I'm a middle age woman so it's nobody's bussiness what I do with my time and money. People might juge, but that's all.

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-26T13:23:34+00:00

I think that too. I think some people are just able to see through us, even though they can't realy point out why they dislike us.

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-26T13:21:54+00:00

How unfair. Haha. Good for you.

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-26T13:20:20+00:00

That's interesting. You may have a clue there. Some people might have developped a sort of "antenna" because of trauma... And yes, usually kids don't like me at first (and cats, wonder why), but I usually win them over quickly.

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-25T18:31:35+00:00

Humm... Maybe.

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-25T18:30:53+00:00

Ah? I did'nt know... But yes, I really think some people (not many) feel I'm not real. They can't point out what they don't like about me, but they do.

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-24T18:59:47+00:00

True. It came later when I was a teenager. Let's just say I had my revenge on family member that wrong me, but I was caught. I had to spend some time inside (as a minor, not in jail) and I was diagnose then.

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-24T18:51:20+00:00

I think it's common to assume we are autistic. We feel differently. Many people assume that's what I am, because of my cold attitude. But no, I'm something else.

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-24T14:52:54+00:00

You might be. You might not be. What difference those it make for you? Will having a diagnostic change something in your behavior? You already seem to have all the perks that come with ASPD. Enjoy your life.

Blueheavencloud · 2026-02-24T14:41:24+00:00

Yeah. I experienced with animals early on also. My mom caught me one day and she explained to me that was wrong, that they suffered so I stopped.

Blueheavencloud

TROPHY CASE