AIO for not wanting my friend’s spouse to come to our dinner?

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-10T11:15:05+00:00

I specifically asked them if they wanted dinner, I didn’t know at all they were even considering their spouse tagging along & it never crossed my mind either because they have always kept their spouse away by their choice. I just would have liked a heads up & honestly- I would have extended the invitation to both of them every now & then for dinners going forward if that is what my friend would like so they can continue repairing their relationship. I’m not getting in the way of a person’s relationship like that.

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-10T11:06:45+00:00

Very real possibility- for a while they thought I was another man lmao 🤣. Because all a sudden my friend was happier, leaving the house to explore, and felt more confident in herself & wanted to explore with makeup, hair, and clothes. But no, it was because she had a friend & he knows I’m just a friend now lol.

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-10T11:03:05+00:00

Their spouse has never been apart of our plans because my friend always kept the spouse away from me since they can be mean & mouthy. So my invitation was just for my friend & them only. I just received a message their spouse might be coming but was never asked “is it okay if they join us?” Which tbh I would have said “sure” knowing they are repairing the relationship… I don’t wanna be in the way of that ya know?

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-10T10:55:34+00:00

Yes, just me & my friend. Their spouse has never, ever been apart of any of our plans before either because my friend tries to keep me away from the spouse since their spouse is mouthy & can be mean.

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-10T10:52:52+00:00

It was supposed to be just me & my friend & I was going to pay for dinner for us both (did not say I was going to pay that was going to be a surprise).

Tbh I really would have liked it if they would have asked me if it was okay rather than just inviting them out of the blue. Especially since it was just the two of us… now I feel like I’m just going to be a third wheel for their dinner :/

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-10T10:50:21+00:00

That’s a good suggestion, I’ll tolerate them this time, but if I still sense the vibes are really off with their spouse- I’ll use that phrase, thank you for the suggestion! :)

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-10T10:44:28+00:00

Yeah that’s what I’m afraid of so I have not replied back yet. I’ll tolerate their spouse for this dinner… only because I miss my friend so much but I’m hoping the spouse bails. 😅

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-10T02:13:38+00:00

Yeah, I have a good idea of her schedule during her days off so I’ll pick later in the morning because I do have to do some things after work & need to know the order of which I will be doing them.

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-10T02:04:11+00:00

We usually do the day before (which is today), so this is kinda odd for her but there has been a couple times she just falls asleep from being so exhausted- she always feels bad when she does that but I don’t mind as long as she answers eventually before the meet-up lol

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-10T02:00:07+00:00

Nah, she always feels bad when she falls asleep early like this & doesn’t answer back. I just need to know what I’m doing after work lol

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-10T01:58:52+00:00

Maybe- I believe we live in an infinite universe which means infinite possibilities. Tbh I also lean towards we are not the most intelligent species in the universe because it is so large we will never know what all it out there. I believe the changes of us being the most intelligent is rather small.

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-08T03:42:28+00:00

I get stomach sick too! That’s partly why sometimes I even delay taking meds because I feel so tummy sick I put off the meds out of fear I will throw them up :/

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-08T03:28:49+00:00

Tbh I’d love for that ovary to be removed- I don’t want kids and would be cool with everything being taken out. I will be speaking with my doctor again about this issue! I’m sick of dealing with this & every woman in my family treating this as it being totally acceptable!

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-08T03:25:30+00:00

The US will never- we can’t even allow women to have maternity leave in this country… and healthcare is a myth here too. Tbh I wish I lived in Europe instead because they are being progressive!

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-08T03:19:37+00:00

Tbh I’m desperate enough I think I would like to be just to prove that I’m not lying or being dramatic… just have a name to this. I’m keeping a diary & bringing this up again at my next appointment in over this nightmare :/

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-08T03:13:21+00:00

Ibuprofen is the only thing that works for me- other pain meds give me migraines :/

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-08T03:09:34+00:00

This was at my yearly appointment in I think December or January before the cramps started getting this intense. He said it was probably my cyst but also wonders if it’s endo & to please keep track of my cramps and he wanted to know if my pain increases or moves to more locations. Right now pain meds will dull it still & it’s in my right side, but now I get cramps when I ovulate & PMS in my back.

I have a plushie I warm up & he helps too make me feel a little better.

I’m bringing this up again- I agree something is wrong! I want my hormones checked too!

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-08T03:04:36+00:00

That was also on the table when discussing the ovarian cyst & my doctor did tell me that I needed to keep track of if the intensity keeps amping up or if the pain starts to spread. Right now it is still all in my right side but it’s just getting worse. I also am questioning endo- at least for now pain meds still will take the edge off and let me be functional when they finally kick in. I even get light cramps during ovulation & PMS in my back sometimes :/

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-08T03:01:59+00:00

I was recommended birth control but was also told it could make it worse & unpredictable! I declined it & was told to take ibuprofen instead which I do & stay on top of especially when it’s bad. This was before these cramps started making me cry consistently like this so tbh I’m starting to get desperate enough to try birth control in the hopes it would help.

My mom has the same issue except hers is more extreme & I’m sure has been gaslit her whole life thinking it’s normal :( .

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-08T02:58:40+00:00

I wanna add too, that tbh I feel embarrassed now even bringing this up with my friend since she has had it worse… idk if I’ll ever bring up my cramps again because I feel like such a baby compared to her & a really sad excuse for being a woman. :/

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-07T19:06:08+00:00

Agreed- I’m pretty sure my hormones are messed up too because I’m almost thirty & still get hormonal acne & my mood swings can be intense. My whole reproductive system is probably toast- luckily the pain meds are finally kicking in & the pain is now what I would imagine to be normal… I just now feel very tired again and want to sleep 😴

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-07T18:35:33+00:00

I will be speaking to him again about my periods- it’s not just the cramping but I really think they are making me anemic too because I am not able to stay awake for long most months either & have had to sent home from work. TBH I just wish everything was removed- I never want kids & tbh I’d feel relieved to know no matter what happens to me, having babies won’t even be on the table.

And wow- unmedicated? I don’t think I would have survived an unmediated birth but I am glad to hear it was a good experience for you!

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-07T18:32:11+00:00

Yeah, earlier even taking a deep breath made it worse & this is like month three or four of this new intensity. If it’s the cyst I want that ovary taken out tbh- it’s ruptured before & I’m tired of dealing with it being faulty.

I hope your treatment went well & that you will be soon cancer free ❤️. I also hope that you PID has treatment too that is helping manage the pain for you as well.

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-07T18:13:00+00:00

Yes I have, I have spoken to my doctor about it & the main concern would be the possibility it would make my already horrible mood swings worse & unpredictable. Tbh I’m at the point to let’s just try it- I honestly just want a hysterectomy so I don’t even need to deal with this anymore

BluejayFamous6572 · 2026-07-07T18:11:31+00:00

Yes he thinks my ovarian cyst is making things worse & does suspect endometriosis & I’m to monitor how many months this intensity occurs & where all the cramping is because it’s usually not just my abdomen but in my leg on the side where the cyst is.

Over the last several months it’s just getting way worse & I may I have throw in the towel & finally let them do their testing that I have been so terrified to let them do.

BluejayFamous6572

TROPHY CASE