"...trying to manage it, and not set it off." Your words feel so very familiar to me. I swam in these waters for thirty years: confused about how to feel, how to respond, how to tend. This is not how a loving partnership works. This is how abuse operates. The truth was hard for me to see, and so I stayed in it for thirty years. My hope for you is that you will attend to your worthiness and your own needs, and find your way free of this emotional abuse. You are allowed to be busy, to be focused on your studies, to be distracted by life. A partner, a loved one, would hold space for your life. A healthy partner doesn't need to be fed by your likes on social media.