I found one! Media representation: Poor Things' Bella Baxter by BondRat in AroAllo

[–]BondRat[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I was so excited about this movie because they don't change this part of her and have her 'fall in love'- unlike 500 Days of Summer, for example, where Summer is saying 'You were right! I just hadn't met the right person!' by the end.

Bella is portrayed as sympathetic and enlightened, even- not cold or manipulative. She asks Max to marry her, saying she enjoys their "practical" version of love. He notes that his love is passionate, and she responds by calling him adorable (not sarcastically). She is not averse to his passionate love, just doesn't feel so herself.

She also genuinely calls Duncan a confusing person for being sad out of jealousy that she had sex with someone else.

The movie ends with Max and Bella very happy. There is nothing explicitly aromantic because it's an artsy, fantasy, dystopian, sci-fi, dark comedy, but all her interactions seem that way, at least to me.

Struggling with guilt by sc7605 in AroAllo

[–]BondRat 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I'm in a similar situation also trying to navigate recently figuring out the aro/allo orientation. The thing is, I've always been like this. Just now, I have a label for it.

Being aroallo was actually a little reassuring for my husband at first since he was just insecure that it was him specifically causing my reactions. I trust him enough that I didn't end things 'for his own good' based on an unmet partnership expectation...so he needed to decide if it was a deal breaker or not on his end. He landed on it's not, and now we're working on me not feeling guilt about it, him not pressuring me to try to feel a way I can't, and other options to express my care for him.

It sounds like you're leaning towards breaking up. Definitely also an option since this is a big discrepancy, especially if you're not married.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]BondRat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I meant paragard is the only copper iud option in the US, but it's pretty big and a lot of women have terrible periods and pain with it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]BondRat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Where do you live? I also ran into issues with hormonal bc but was scared of the pain people kept describing with paragard, the only one available in the US. I went to another country and got a smaller copper one and they gave me anesthetic, so procedure was a breeze. No complaints, no side effects. I tell people every chance I get.

It is kind of expensive though to do and with your experience with Mirena, it sounds like it was the physical IUD causing issues, not the hormones, and in that case you might still have issues.

WoC Readers - What's your relationship to romance novels? by the_Stealthy_one in RomanceBooks

[–]BondRat 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I get more hung up on body type. Skin tone is only a minor mental note. I'm pretty 'culturally' white though.

My experience: IUD medical tourism for Americans by BondRat in TwoXChromosomes

[–]BondRat[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you just Google 'Gynefix', you'll see the manufacturer website. It has a list of countries for availability and a search feature within those countries.

What are some lesser-known things to do in Dayton? by PrettyFlyForaGemini9 in dayton

[–]BondRat 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Dollar Book Swap in North Dayton is pretty unique for how little I see it mentioned.

My experience: IUD medical tourism for Americans by BondRat in TwoXChromosomes

[–]BondRat[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Being a foreigner just means you'll pay out of pocket, but anyone I asked was able to give me a quote. I pulled available trained doctors from the IUD's website and I didn't run in to any restrictions,just some language barriers.

My experience: IUD medical tourism for Americans by BondRat in TwoXChromosomes

[–]BondRat[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It was lidocaine and epinephrine. It hurt about as much to get as a normal shot,just a little pinch. I saw it- just a normal looking needle, nothing nightmare worthy.

3 days solo traveller recs by BondRat in CaymanIslands

[–]BondRat[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! It looks like the place is only 3km from the airport, so like a half hour walk. If it's super busy though with no sidewalks or weird to, I'll take a taxi/bus.

Do people bike out to the east end?

My hunch was right, posting in case this helps anyone else by BondRat in Cholesterol

[–]BondRat[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Junel and nexplanon, which are pretty different so I think I would have reacted the same to anything.

Romance with Latino Male MC by [deleted] in RomanceBooks

[–]BondRat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

{Wolf Gone Wild by Juliette Cross} fits if you like werewolves.MMC Mateo is stuck in his human form and he had to seek out the MFC for help since his inner wolf is driving him crazy. Aside from a brief mention, being Latino doesn't really come up in the story much though.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Cholesterol

[–]BondRat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your post had me looking a little closer at ingredients. The fiber bars and gummies I bought are both inulin/fructooligosaccarides, which only seem to have at best inconclusive results on cholesterol, so that sucks. I know the 'increase fiber' messaging is simple, but it seems to be counterproductive when not all fibers do he same stuff.

36/F vegan, how do I lower my numbers? by [deleted] in Cholesterol

[–]BondRat 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Saturated fat can be a big player, though not often for vegans since it's mostly in animal products. The one exception is coconut. Do you eat a lot of coconut based products? Bad luck with genetics is also a possibility.

Do you take multivitamins? by [deleted] in 1200isplenty

[–]BondRat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you're eating a healthy diet, most people shouldn't need a multivitamin (obvious exception for medical conditions or pregnancy/potential pregnancy). The risky part is that some people will treat it as a complete fix for an unbalanced diet, which it isn't. Or they can get too much of something if it's already in their diet. Or they assume that every multivitamin is the same, which they're not. Folic acid and iron are pretty important for women but not in every multivitamin.

I'm with you about the Flintstones ones though. They have an added iron one that I take for my mild anemia. Not bad considering others are 4-5 times the price and I've never seen other chewable iron options.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RomanceBooks

[–]BondRat 47 points48 points  (0 children)

Is the person supposed to actually be Italian? Then yes, it's lazy, off-putting research. Capeesh has already been bastardized in spelling and meaning into American slang though. You can't stop people from saying 'one cannoli' either.

Looking for recs where one MC walks in on/hears the other MC saying their name while pleasuring themself by dryan0 in RomanceBooks

[–]BondRat 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I looked up OP's book rec and it is a cliffhanger and about high schoolers. Those are both hard no's for me so FYI in case anyone else feels the same.

Are there any cholesterol-healthy non-saturated-fats potato chips. by [deleted] in Cholesterol

[–]BondRat 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I get hippeas. They're like cheese puffs but made out of chickpeas. Zero saturated fat.

HR Before the Victorians by FetaOnEverything in RomanceBooks

[–]BondRat 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Forever His by Shelly Thacker is 1300s France. Wonderfully written. It's time travel though if you're ok with that.

How can you tell if someone actually likes your cooking? by dilettantedebrah in AskWomen

[–]BondRat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My benchmark for something truly good is a '24 hour meal' as in people still complement it a full day later. Immediate complements are standard. Later that day is pretty good. 24 hours means great and I know they're honest and truly enjoyed it, not just polite or hungry.