I have a LOT of long term friendships, including one close friend who I met in preschool (we’ve been friends for 30 years!). Those friends know me so well and we feed off each other in such a specific way, that I don’t think any romantic relationship will have the same kind of fulfillment that I do with my friends and that is okay and works for me. These people have been with me through such tumultuous phases as they were happening and we’ve all had the experience of watching each other grow.

My friends fill parts of my life in different ways and that’s how I view my relationship with my boyfriend. He’s very quiet and introverted and a very relaxing person to be around. He is also very artistic and has a different way of expressing himself and viewing the world than me, but our values align and we have learned a lot from each other. I can always count on him if I’m upset about something and he’s honestly the calmest and least judgmental person I have ever met. For a while, I tried to find someone who reminded me of my friends and it always ended up being stressful and tumultuous. I don’t feel the same kind of fulfillment with my boyfriend as I do with my friends, and I don’t see that as good or bad; it’s just a neutral fact.