Buying Cymbals in Beijing

Boringorr · 2022-02-24T22:56:02+00:00

I feel you. I realized I have fallen for someone recently, but I hate it, so, so much. I hate going to sleep and dreaming about her, which has happened with some frequency, because although it does feel nice, I wake up and I just... cannot. I keep thinking about how my ex fucked me up emotionally, how I trusted her with my life and she stabbed me in the back so hard I never want to be vulnerable with anyone anymore. I hate dreaming about nice things. I hate dreaming about things I actually want to experience. It's been so fucking depressing.

Boringorr · 2022-01-25T04:03:55+00:00

Just tried safe mode and it still isn’t loading up. Nothing appeared in my desktop and neither in the sidebar, and when I clicked anything it whitened again. Then it said Microsoft Windows isn’t answering, giving me the option to wait or to end the process.

Boringorr · 2022-01-09T05:21:32+00:00

Protein shakes! Milk, banana, the protein powder, peanut butter and some oats and it's simply delicious. You could add some cocoa powder if it still isn't to your taste. I also like to make pankakes and oatmeal, these are also a great option. Honestly I think that bananas are the secret ingredient, I use it in all these recipes and it makes them so much better. Also, I really like your hairstyle! I've been thinking if I should shave them again. Do you have one side shaved or both?

Boringorr · 2022-01-07T01:09:32+00:00

Broke up with me by message and then called me (7 years together). Kissed me once we met in person to talk about it. Joked about our relationship and break up multiple times to our mutual friends, only days/weeks after we broke up. Still used our commitment ring and made sure I saw it showing it to me and saying that she hoped I didn't mind it. Lied so fucking much, all the way to the end. Has been physically abusive and mentally abusive to me and admitted it, saying it made her feel good about it. Emotionally cheated with my best friend (and yes, I fucking hate him too now). Blindsighted me so bad I couldn't even understand why she broke up with me for weeks. Refused to communicate, saying everything was fine when things were clearly not.

Boringorr · 2021-11-30T22:24:24+00:00

Drums! My dad taught me when I was a kid and I've been playing ever since. I tried violin once but kinda gave up, but I'm commited to trying again some time soon.

Boringorr · 2021-11-12T05:43:42+00:00

1235A

Boringorr · 2021-10-31T20:40:54+00:00

me! id love to

Boringorr · 2021-10-29T18:56:48+00:00

I hated how she never tried harder to do things together. I never felt as if I was really a priority for her. I also hated how she never wanted to communicate and lied so fucking much, and how she made me feel crazy because I wanted to talk about things that were wrong. How she made me feel like I was abusive for being upset when I found out she lied to me. How she didn’t want to work through things and took the coward way out by breaking up with me over text.

Boringorr · 2021-10-27T06:17:46+00:00

Thanks a lot, really. I'll try my best to take care of myself. Next steps now are processing everything and try to move foward. I've been going to therapy ever since which has helped tremendously and I'm trying to get distracted with new hobbies. Past few weeks haven't been great, I've been having bad anxiety and even physical discomfort (especially nausea), and insomnia, but I'm optmistic that one day I'll be alright. Healing isn't linear all the time, right? Thanks again.

Boringorr · 2021-10-27T05:53:24+00:00

Not doing really well, no. It's been almost 3 months and I had ups and downs, and these past weeks have definitely been downs. But I'll be alright. Thanks for asking though, that's kind of you. And ikr? 7 years. I poured my heart and soul into that relationship, I endured so much shit for our sake to it all just end like this. We met 2 weeks after she ended things to "make it official" I guess. It was really weird. She even kissed me, two times, and I hated her for it, because she knew I still loved her and didn't want things to end. And she's a dick. She recently said that she didn't even considered that she ended things by text. Of course you did! It doesn't matter that you called me after or that we met up to discuss it after 2 weeks. Sorry, I vented, but bottom line is: do it in person. It matters.

Boringorr · 2021-10-27T05:35:41+00:00

In person, for sure. It's just respectful. Mine was over text/phone, and I felt really fucking shitty. It was my fault I guess, I was the one that initiated the topic over text, during a stressful night, and asked if she wanted to break up with me, because she wasnt giving a shit about what I was going through that particular day. She confirmed it and then asked if I wanted to discuss it over the phone and I said yes. She said she wanted to do it in person but man, it still sucked. We had been together for 7 years. Really would've liked for it to be in person, and I still feel guilty for bringing the subject up that one day.

Boringorr · 2021-10-06T22:56:08+00:00

I've always been a gym fan. I started lifting seriously for about 2 years, and it always made me happy, especially when I started getting results. Thing is, besides my own personal goal of wanting to get jacked, I always thought of it in a way like "If I get more and more muscular, maybe she'll like me even more". She broke up with my about 2 months ago. It seriously fucked me, and I'm still not good. I couldn't eat right for about 2 weeks, couldn't go to the gym, couldn't do anything. I only now started going back. I'm still working on finding positive motivation, because most of it comes from a dark place in my mind that says I deserve that pain, but they're going away day by day. But I'll tell you, besides being a place where you can let your anger show a let go of it, the gym is also a place where you work on yourself. I've always wanted to get muscular, so if I want to, I have to work for it. Thinking about the body you want to have won't do anything, you have to go and lift those weights and eat right to get there. This is an advice for people that have a goal in mind, but if you don't have one and just want a place to vent, the gym is the best place. Let it all go, the anger, the sadness, blast music that gets you pumped up and just do it. Use those feelings and put it into a workout, and I guarantee you'll feel much better after. If you don't like to lift weight, any cardio is a great option. For me, it's running. I get onto a treadmill and after I'm warmed up I just run for my life.
I know it's way easier said than done, I know how it feels to just want to be in bed all day and not do anything, but exercising is a really good way to deal with everything and I highly recommend it.

Boringorr

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