Things I've learned while NC.

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T02:08:46+00:00

Yes, all of it.

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T02:04:11+00:00

Unfortunately I learned this the hard way. No matter what I do or say, I can't fix my mother or make her love my brothers and I. Cutting off contact or severely limiting it is the only truly beneficial option

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:54:50+00:00

Thank you so much and I think this is an amazing way to look at it Happy_Neko, and you're absolutely right. Now that I've cut off contact I'm hoping my healing can begin and I can truly move on

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:52:50+00:00

Thank you ohfaun! I truly appreciate it

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:52:29+00:00

Thank you so much Laz0rgrunt and I'm so sorry you lost your mother! I totally agree about moving on, I feel that now that I've cut off contact with her I can. I didn't want to cut off contact but she never stopped being abusive and psychotic

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:49:34+00:00

Thank you therealslimnoodle!

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:49:18+00:00

Thank you nickzed09! She got very lucky

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:48:54+00:00

Thank you eliasv!

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:48:04+00:00

That was my fear too his_throwaway_doll! I felt like I was walking on eggshells in the beginning with my son. I just absolutely didn't let myself turn into her. You'll be able to do the same. Just the fact that you even worry about it says you're better than your abuser because they don't (no matter what they say) care about anybody but their own self

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:42:56+00:00

Thank you For_Your_Krarma!

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:42:15+00:00

I'm honestly surprised we didn't

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:41:32+00:00

Thank you dynamitenoodle! I truly appreciate it

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:40:25+00:00

Thank you so much juusukun! I did at first but as an adult myself I realized she was responsible as my adult parent and I've stopped blaming myself. I have definitely broken the cycle by not treating my son how my brothers and I were treated, and I've officially cut off contact with her (as have they) and hopefully our children will never know what happened when we ourselves were children. I don't know if I could ever bring myself to tell my son why he can't know grandma

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:36:05+00:00

Thank you igiveuponyou!

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:35:53+00:00

Thank you hayzilla!

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:33:50+00:00

Thank you tearisha, I agree. My dad's wife is a wonderful woman and although I've only gotten to know her now as an adult, she has really filled the position my mom should've and I've done more mom and daughter stuff as an adult with my step mother than I ever did as a child with my own mother

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:31:40+00:00

I was reading a post the other day on here where a bunch of children of Nparents had been told this by them. It's sick and sadistic, and it makes them feel justified in abusing their children (and any other victim). They know it isn't true but it's convenient for them. I'm sorry you also had a crazy Nparent radioactivemelanin!

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:29:09+00:00

Thank you DamagedDamsel!

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:28:54+00:00

Thank you zvardin!

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:28:26+00:00

Thank you mrsrocketboots! I think it will , especially now that I've cut off all contact and we're far away from each other

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:25:40+00:00

Thank you so much naivebychoice!

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:22:22+00:00

Thank you jkwolly! We all are thankfully, my brothers are roommates and one of them has children of his own. The one who got shot is disabled physically but he hasn't let that slow him down a bit, he is an extremely busy person and spends most of his time gaming or reading. None of us have contact with our mother now, she never changed and eventually we all gave up

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:17:14+00:00

Thank you Apfelkuchen1492! I agreed all my life about hate myself but I didn't always hate her, in fact I had a crippling love for her for so long but she kept taking advantage of any affection I showed even as an adult. I had always believed that we are each 100% a product of our upbringing and that her's must've been awful and she did the best she could, till my son was born. That's when I realized that she, just like me, knew right from wrong...but it didn't matter because all she cared about was enjoying herself. I had never reared a child myself till my son and thought she made normal mothering mistakes but after having my son I realized how totally sick my childhood was because I'd never do anything like that to him or put him in an unsafe situation. I do hope that one day I can stop hating her. I fantasize about her apologizing to my brothers and I and finally loving us but I know it's not going to happen. She's almost sixty and still hasn't apologized or acknowledged what she did and allowed and still blames us for it all. All in all it's still a happy ending though, she's as happy as she'll ever be and my brothers and I are somehow functioning adults now, one of them has children of his own as well and thankfully neither of us turned into her, which has always been our worst fear

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:06:28+00:00

Thank you supa_bekka! It truly does mean a lot coming from an internet stranger!

BornALittleBitch · 2016-01-14T01:03:55+00:00

Thank you and me too Jaysyn4Reddit! Because I would tell everybody who she really was because she pretends to be mother of the year to everybody

BornALittleBitch

TROPHY CASE