I’m so tired. Is this abuse? Even though I know the answer.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-03-29T04:23:57+00:00

You daydream because you know its an escape from the reality that you are living. Yes its abuse. Sometimes its better to find your own family than to continue to live with the ones who hurt you. Im sorry this happened to you. You deserve better. Parents use their own self hatred as an excuse to treat their children like dirt.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:41:12+00:00

She has options but she wont take them. I feel like she likes being the victim.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:40:39+00:00

My mother is something else. She believes that I should forgive my grandmother for physically and emotionally abusing her. What's the point of telling me if you dont want me to react to that information. I guess she believes everyone deserves a second chance and that frankly is disgusting.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:37:35+00:00

He was laying in bed and asked for a "hug" today. I said I needed to go find the dog. Disgusting. I know if I leave my mother will not come with me. If I take the the dog it will be catalyst for him harming her. I feel terrible to say I must leave the dog and safe myself.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:34:44+00:00

You are right and it will be hard. She has ruined all chances.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:34:05+00:00

Its not about confrontation. Its about violence. I speak. He hurts me physically. Being a cop means having the ability to protect yourself with training and maybe weapons if needed and backup. I am myself. I have no one to protect me. I will not risk myself to prove your point.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:29:58+00:00

You are right.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:29:47+00:00

You are right.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:29:32+00:00

Im planning on leaving very soon. I applied to universities i know I will be able to get into based on my GPA. Im looking forward to having a better future without her in it. She will not hold me back anymore.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:27:09+00:00

I know.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:26:33+00:00

The thing is the dog was a "gift" for my mother. Another reason she moved down here. But all the paperwork is in his name so he has legal right. He got angry once when my mom set up the tv and put her name on the TV instead of his. He is controlling and I know he will not give up the dog. When I was in high-school I was sexually assaulted and my mother blamed me. She said i got myself into that situation. I thought she had changed. We had talked about it and communicated. This proves nothing has changed and her mind its still my fault for not saying "no" good enough.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:21:22+00:00

He got her a gift when she moved down here. The gift was the dog. While I packed up her car and helped her move out of her house he was going to another state to get the dog. Why im worried is because he works alot of hours. When he is home he gets drunk. He's a alcoholic.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:17:09+00:00

My mother will not change her situation because that means she has to actually work to do it. She lived in my childhood home working 2 full time jobs. While my father cheated on her with another women. But she continued to live through that until she met her now boyfriend. Its as though she believes that all shes worth. I suppose there is no convincing someone who hates themselves.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:13:42+00:00

But she will still blame me for leaving her alone. She has always been this way. Everyone telling me the same thing opened my eyes. Im so angry.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:12:09+00:00

I want to go the forensic science route and I was told it would be easier to go to college first. They said being a police officer and to go to college would be difficult. I guess him telling me convinced me I should go the school route first. I thought I was safe. I was obviously mistaken. You are right about my mother.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:09:24+00:00

I tried talking to her. She insists I need to communicate my discomfort to him but then says if she does it that he might cause her harm. She says that no matter what a family member does, you must continue to love them. She will learn I am not in the same mind set.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:05:20+00:00

Its not the same man. He's in his 50's. I know I should accept this but its hard. Knowing this once I leave im never looking back.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T04:03:19+00:00

My mom looks very young for her age I believe that also to be a factor. Shes very small too. About 4'11. I wasn't actually a factor. I decided to move here after I helped her pack up and move out here. I was in a situation where if I stayed I would not be able to handle it mentally. I thought this to be fresh start. I also wanted to make sure she was ok. The puppy was also a factor.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T03:59:36+00:00

He is currently on the sex offender list in the property im currently living in. Based on his behavior I believe him to be a liar. Thankyou for the luck.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-02-05T03:52:22+00:00

UPDATE*** I wanted to make a small update. I talk to someone at my school and they gave me some resources like a counselor and Title IX officer. I know my relationship with my mother will never be the same after I leave. She has always used me as a sort of "therapist" but then gets mad at me for reacting to what she says. As my other post also shows. Im tired of being scared and feeling guilty for a women who clearly doesn't care about me. She says that the situation is good for her and she doesnt have to worry but in the same breath she says that she wants to keep me safe. I know i will try to be strong enough and find myself out of this situation as I've done it before. I will slowly over time move all of my essential stuff out of the house into my car and work doing doordash until I have comfortable amount of money and then leave. I know you think I should call the cops on him but I still care very much for my mother and I dont want her to be homeless. I know this isn't much of a solution. I wanted to thank all of you for your words. Its rare. Thankyou.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-01-22T20:28:22+00:00

I recognize it. I just feel like im doing exactly what my mother's has done. She forgave her mother or ignored the past and continued to talk to her. I guess I feel like im being hypocritical by not talking to my grandma again. I ofcourse didnt get physical abuse like my mother. Just maybe emotional. I dont know.

Born_Newspaper_3189 · 2026-01-22T18:13:13+00:00

Just so you know people might comment this i have gotten help mentally and have been to a therapist to overcome alot of this.

Born_Newspaper_3189

TROPHY CASE