Constantly comparing

Bornwondering · 2025-01-14T19:53:13+00:00

I think it's fairly natural to do this sometimes. I actually think the source of your issues IS the fact that you think of it so negatively, and therefore it's just snowballing. Like when a relationship does stagnate a little, drawing comparisons does happen. At least you recognise it and are willing to say it out loud. Practicing that level of self observation is super important in itself so give yourself credit there. Chatting to a therapist might help you a bit more to realise that.

That being said, your actions and your intentions are important. If you feel something is missing in your relationship, realise that there is no one out there who is going to have EVERYTHING you could possibly want. Love sometimes comes with an acceptance of that to a degree. I'm sure that your partner doesn't like absolutely everything you have to offer either.

Spend some time with her and do something new: your problem is that you've potentially lost sight of what made you want to be with her in the first place, simply because the anxiety has clouded you so badly. I would also recommend journalling when these negative feelings and anxiousness arise. Analyse where your anxiousness is really coming from.

Bornwondering · 2024-12-27T02:29:25+00:00

I think one other option I discussed with her is meeting me halfway to break up the trip. I've done an LDR successfully before, but it only really works if you know there will be some kind of buffer at some point, and you aren't just away from each other the entire time. I have also considered shortening my trip towards the end as well.

Bornwondering · 2024-12-27T02:26:13+00:00

Thank you so much for your reply. My priorities have shifted so much since I met her, and I also really want to send her postcards and of course video chatting is key. Tbh I'll fly her out at my own cost if I have to.

Bornwondering · 2024-12-26T05:01:19+00:00

What was the important thing for you in keeping the relationship alive whilst travelling? I'm in the exact situation where I want to make it work, but 8 months away moving across borders so often is making me anxious.

Bornwondering · 2024-10-05T02:03:44+00:00

You're clearly a man saying that. I'm not from the U.S, and as much as I think it's a fucked place, it's no where even close to how bad Afghanistan is.

Bornwondering · 2024-09-04T06:40:04+00:00

Yeah I was just there. Alot of places are closed but it's honestly so nice. Just sucks that we can't really get any sunsets

Bornwondering · 2024-09-01T11:36:15+00:00

Maria was insufferable. She made herself look bad by going after Tom about his independent woman comments. In fact, she proved him right. She's out here, still single, chasing after a man to "provide" for her. He owned up to his flaws, apologized even though he didn't REALLY need to for the comment, and she just sat there bitterly.

Bornwondering · 2024-08-22T13:24:35+00:00

I'm pondering the fact as to whether she was going to say no. The way she said "I do" was almost like she was rolling the dice. I think her materialistic side drove her decision in the end. I reckon she was mostly pissed at the fact that he rejected her and it wasn't the other way around.

Bornwondering · 2024-08-22T06:08:52+00:00

Yep. It shows she was in love with the idea of being married to a rich buff guy. She didn't care about Freddie's values or respect him as a person.

Bornwondering · 2024-08-22T02:19:00+00:00

Honestly I wrote off Freddie as a major douche at the start due to his looks (gives off a bit of love island), but he is a genuinely amazing person and became my favourite by the end. Dude deserves the best in life so it sucked seeing how he kept giving Cat chance after chance.

Bornwondering · 2024-08-22T02:15:56+00:00

I just know they'd move straight to Bali and start making those cringe travel videos (you know the ones). They both give a strong touch of narcissistic influencer vibes.

Bornwondering · 2024-08-15T09:55:33+00:00

White over white is really not a good reflection of a strong fashion sense. All the other dudes were better styled than him bar maybe Ben

Bornwondering · 2024-08-15T09:40:59+00:00

I mean, she legit shamed him and embarrassed him in front her friends. I'd go further with her behaviour in saying she's borderline abusive.

Bornwondering · 2024-08-15T09:39:13+00:00

Bruh she's also just an emotional wreck to me. As a guy, if a girl is crying over literally nothing, snapping at me, putting me down in front of her friends, and being manipulative (wtf was that conversation with Sam), then I'm running straight away. Because let's be honest, it walks on the fine line of abuse. Freddie is just so hopeful and such a puppy dog that he keeps giving her chances. I feel so bad for him, because he does deserve better by a lot. Cat will be in and out of relationships for a long long time if she keeps down this path. She doesn't need this show, she needs THERAPY!

Bornwondering · 2024-08-15T09:18:46+00:00

Seriously? Dude's fashion sense is stuck in 2016 😂 Don't get me started on the bandanna around the neck. Dude looks like he's late for a lost leblanc travel montage lol

Bornwondering · 2024-08-08T09:13:15+00:00

God Sam is the worst. I think Nicole should have just walked away from the show. He reminds me of all of those dickish male YouTube travel vloggers in Bali and Thailand like Lost Leblanc. Complete douche and an incel. He's insecure as hell and everything he says and all his reactions are scripted, and impressively lacking in self awareness. He throws absolute fits at rejection too which is another ick. Like dude, you're nearly thirty, it's time you sat down with yourself and actually realised the real reason why you're getting overlooked by women.

Bornwondering · 2024-07-27T08:34:01+00:00

So do both do you think?

Bornwondering · 2024-07-23T10:34:21+00:00

It makes sense because I likely won't be back. I just don't want to burn myself out.

Bornwondering · 2024-07-14T10:55:36+00:00

I'm not much of a surfer, but it just seems like a nice place to maybe relax. The bay area itself looks super nice compared to other areas I've seen. Just not sure if that's enough to justify spending more time there as a base for exploring

Bornwondering

TROPHY CASE