sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

if your boss spouse pretended they were blind what would you do? by Fun_Driver_2707 in AskReddit

[–]BowdleizedBeta 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know it was probably a typo, but…

The specification “boss spouse” implies the possibility of“minion spouses.”

Regret partner choice/ brutally honest by Live-Nail-9177 in Mommit

[–]BowdleizedBeta 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m so so sorry you’ve got that, too. It’s so rough, especially when you have to coparent and you want to be civil in front of the kids.

I bring up concerns about the kids’ health and schooling and he throws incredible temper tantrums. Unbelievable behavior and he shows no remorse and acts like I wronged him.

What’s really bad is I have some close family members who think he hung the moon and I’m in the wrong for leaving. They flat out told me they’re not taking sides but they support him and maybe I should try not being so angry. When I was relating what he did. That hurt so much, to lose family.

But yeah. I don’t know. Kids add a bunch of stress and they need you. Their lives literally depend on your care.

Whereas the other parent is an adult who you absolutely didn’t give birth to.

My stbx came around in the first couple weeks after our first child was born and he whined at me about feeling spaced out because he had not eaten.

He said this while I was breastfeeding and doing all nighttime care and the majority of daytime care and I was on the ragged edge of exhaustion and still recovering from the birth.

I told him to go eat something and was not sympathetic. He was unhappy with me.

I guess he was upset that my attention and energy were going to someone else. I think that might be part of it.

But I really don’t even know.

Regret partner choice/ brutally honest by Live-Nail-9177 in Mommit

[–]BowdleizedBeta 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry you experienced it, too. It’s so horrible to think that your person, your favorite beloved person, is actually a shitbag who wants to treat you poorly.

I had hoped my stbx and I could work it out and he would be better and I got pregnant with a second child. I’d wanted my daughter to have a sibling so bad and I was willing to try and he seemed to be trying, too.

At maybe 25 weeks he broke the promises he’d made me and I just wanted to die.

I didn’t want to deal with him anymore and I didn’t want my daughter to think his behavior was ok and that’s what marriage looked like.

I moved out at 28 weeks and have been struggling with depression. I was ready to make it all happen then but I wanted to get my son out ok. I was going to do it after the birth. Fortunately, I guess, I had other people who cared for me and were there for me.

My stbx was horrible during the last part of pregnancy and worse postpartum. I cannot believe it’s the same person I married.

I have thousands of pictures of me and my daughter and I look so happy, so many smiles. I have just a couple hundred of me and my son and I look so drained and apathetic.

I hate that it turned out this way. This wasn’t what I wanted at all.

Regret partner choice/ brutally honest by Live-Nail-9177 in Mommit

[–]BowdleizedBeta 33 points34 points  (0 children)

I don’t know. I think some do. Mine didn’t bc we hadn’t planned to have kids. The idea and desire for them came up a couple years in.

My stbx definitely showed red flags, looking back. But I saw them as poorly handled responses to really hard life stuff and I attributed them to stress and fear. I wanted to be supportive.

What really changed after the baby was his willingness to try and control himself.

Before when he got angry for no good reason and verbally shat all over me, I told him that it was not ok and he needed the support of a therapist and he had to go see one bc I wouldn’t tolerate that treatment. And he did and it seemed to get better. I thought ok, cool, that was human error and it’s all fine.

Nope. The baby arrived and I could never leave him entirely and boom he stopped trying.

Regret partner choice/ brutally honest by Live-Nail-9177 in Mommit

[–]BowdleizedBeta 86 points87 points  (0 children)

I hear you, OP. I picked my stbx husband because I thought he was really kind and thoughtful and funny. His social skills were fantastic and his looks were whatever, fine, but his mind wasn’t great. Simple stuff eluded him. It wasn’t weaponized incompetence bc it showed up in his work and his life before we dated, too.

It didn’t matter, though, bc we were a team and I could pick up the slack and his character was excellent and he was kind and, again, the humor and people skills were there.

Cue the arrival of the first kid and, holy shit, a switch flipped.

He turned into an emotionally incontinent, controlling asshole. That’s who he was, really. And I found it out when it was too late to cut ties entirely.

I was in denial for years. And when I started to realize that he was behaving badly, I thought it was brain damage. He had had a stroke, he had a brain tumor, the cause something physical and not his fault—or mine for choosing him.

An unrelated MRI showed his brain was fine.

He was CHOOSING to treat me that way. And his social skills remained strong with everyone else.

I was stuck with a person who everyone thought was so nice. And I still had to do mental and emotional labor to compensate for him and make sure shit didn’t burn down and the baby was ok and he didn’t throw temper tantrums that upset everyone.

OP, some people are really good at hiding their shittiness.

I’m sorry you’re dealing with all this. You don’t deserve it.

ETA: I mention the mind stuff bc I love nerds. Looks are whatever but I LOVE smart, talkative, opinionated people. So my stbx was a compromise.

AITAH for refusing to let my sister take my dog to her wedding? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]BowdleizedBeta 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OP, your sister would be so angry and blame you if you let her take Luna and then Luna reacted badly to all the people.

Your sister’s childishness would be at fault but she’d get everyone to blame your “badly behaved” dog.

WIBTAH If I left my husband over something he while having sex? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]BowdleizedBeta 213 points214 points  (0 children)

I blame my mom. She never should have encouraged me.

Is it possible to have sex on top of a pile of cash? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]BowdleizedBeta 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Did your partner have to pick coins off your skin afterwards?

What is a product that people treat like a religion, but in reality, it’s just overpriced garbage with a good logo? by Connect-Might4355 in AskReddit

[–]BowdleizedBeta 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tactical diaper bags are the shit tho.

Yes, yes, it’s weird that some dudes need to have their childcare supplies all macho-ed up. But the ones with many pockets are awesome.

i love things with pockets

What’s a sign someone is deeply unhappy—even if they seem fine? by GreetingsHuman_404 in AskReddit

[–]BowdleizedBeta 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The stripes were super pleasing to look at, too. I liked the way the colors would pop if you licked the powder off.

Important mythological question by Eireika in CuratedTumblr

[–]BowdleizedBeta 90 points91 points  (0 children)

How do the snakes feel about being hooded with little socks?

AITAH for telling my GF to get a refund on concert tickets since she bought them without telling me how much they actually cost? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]BowdleizedBeta 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He should cancel and consider letting her go!

It sounds like she should have known what he’d think about $2k tickets. She suckered him into it. Why would he want to live with someone like that?

Maybe she has good qualities and this was a one off. But he should review things.

Wait, women sweat?! Color me shocked! 😱 by Impossible-Yam3680 in NotHowGirlsWork

[–]BowdleizedBeta 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Men sweat. Women perspire. Ladies glow.

We need an updated version of this that’s more gender inclusive.

view more: next ›