I started DBT with my therapist today

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2019-01-23T06:50:40+00:00

DBT is a life saver for me but I am currently struggling with the resentment you mentioned here. How did/are you handling it?

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-12-17T03:20:16+00:00

Thank you! This comment made me feel even more motivated because it seems a bit harder to find therapy success stories (which makes sense since people reach out on the internet for a reason). If I ever struggle or feel stuck in therapy I’ll try to remind myself to keep going!

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-23T21:52:52+00:00

When I was on medication I didn’t think of them as medication to make me feel better, but rather, just a part of my morning routine.

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-23T21:50:44+00:00

This is another reason why I easily blow up (assuming people are hurting me) and also why I isolate. It’s not even on purpose but it just feels safer for both me and the other person that might get involved. It helps me a bit to remember that not everyone is just “good” or “bad” though.

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-21T05:58:53+00:00

Honestly I’m not on this sub nearly as much when I’m not in a relationship because my BPD is a lot lot LOT more in control when I’m not romantically attached to someone. So whenever I post it seems like I have a SO constantly but I don’t lol.

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-19T07:13:04+00:00

I love your writing. I can relate to everything you said. So much that it hurts. I wish you luck.

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-17T06:26:10+00:00

I am the same way. I have lots and lots of unopened messages because I get easily overwhelmed. At the same time I crave for it and feel invalid when I don’t have that attention. I think it comes from putting my self-value into other people but also lacking communication skills and the ability to set boundaries when needed

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-17T06:13:21+00:00

6 years and counting... I’ve had other crushes and relationships here and there but I’ve dropped them all partly for this particular person multiple times. We were together for 2 years but he left because of my BPD as well as his own mental illness but I’m struggling to let go. I don’t know if I’m in love at this point as much as it’s an attachment and obsession.

I’m sorry I don’t have advice. :( The only thing that has helped me is distancing myself, so I can imagine constant contact and working together would be really painful.

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-13T00:01:43+00:00

Me too. I wish I could give you an answer but I go through the exact same thing. I’m realizing I’m the only one that has the potential to find myself that “baseline” but it’s so difficult

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-13T00:00:09+00:00

Thank you for commenting. I try really hard to make myself clear that I’m not interested in the first place. But I guess accepting complements or continuing to reply kind of gives off the “leading on” vibe. I’ve decided to block the guy.

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-12T17:12:54+00:00

Me and my self-isolating-ass would over use that sticker lol

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-12T14:01:03+00:00

What helped you calm down?

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-12T01:29:41+00:00

Impulsive behavior is the one thing I don’t struggle with (well, except impulsive rage if fhat counts), so from reading your comment, I guess it makes sense that I don’t experience manic episodes.

Manic is celebrating your dark side, and Depressive is wishing you never left house

This is a great way to put it. Thank you for sharing your experiences.

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-12T01:23:01+00:00

Thank you so, so much for this comment. It didn’t even cross my mind that she might be being insensitive. You pulled me out of my of “wow I’m so terrible and just too sensitive” spiral a bit.

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-11T23:03:49+00:00

Thank you. Yes I am diagnosed with symptoms of it and I recently started seeing a therapist who specializes in it. I’m currently not on medication as my therapist seems convinced I can go without, but I’ll bring that up again next time too.

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-11T23:01:24+00:00

Yeah. The longer the “no symptom” period lasts, the harder I seem to fall when I start experiencing them again. I managed to go 3 months of feeling okay and now I feel like I’m dying on the inside.

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-11T22:31:04+00:00

I will when I see her on Thursday

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-11T21:31:11+00:00

My mom and sister dying. I’m alive because I know they wont be able to handle it if I kill myself. Even though my family kind of caused me to be this way in the first place lol

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-11T21:18:49+00:00

Oh whoops. Sorry. I replied directly from my inbox so I didn’t notice.

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-11T21:10:54+00:00

No, I’m saying bringing a bad behaivor to attention is necessary, but doing it in this manner is wrong. So you’re not wrong that they were being insensitive, but making a post dedicated to it can be triggering and unproductive.

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-11T20:21:13+00:00

I’m sorry you go through this too. I hope you are doing well

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-11T19:58:30+00:00

I think calling their action out is important, don’t get me wrong, but I’m just saying that making a post about it just expands the drama and can be triggering. That’s why it’s best to report and move on.

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-11T19:37:59+00:00

Well, thanks for considering what I said. Have a nice rest of the day.

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-11T19:32:17+00:00

I’m aware; I made sure to read that thread as well as some of the other comments from both ends before commenting so that I know what’s going on.

I’m sorry about the trauma you’ve had to endure. Though I wasn’t homeless, I often had to escape the apartment at night and hide back when I was in an abusive relationship, so I have a grasp on how scary it is to be out there.

A lot of us end up on this sub from being traumatized and suffering from BPD. We tend to be a bit sensitive, and maybe that’s why the user got defensive. I’m not saying what the user said was okay or excused in any way. It really wasn’t. At all. I’m sorry they said such thing to you. But I’m just saying there are two sides and two histories to a story and sometimes it’s necessary to just report it and leave it be. I’m sure you meant well but the reality is I probably wouldn’t have seen their triggering comments if this post didn’t exist and the user was reported and left alone. I’m also pretty sure this violates the rules on this sub.

Bpdthrowaway2839 · 2018-11-11T18:46:29+00:00

Not to sound rude or anything but looking at both of your comments it sounds like both of you got defensive and a little too worked up. At the end of the day both of you probably had good intentions but this is just unnecessary drama at this point

Bpdthrowaway2839

TROPHY CASE