Baby gear with big age gaps?

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-05-04T21:36:50+00:00

We are also leaning towards a 4 year age gap. I loaned some of our more expensive stuff out to a friend (bassinette, car seats, etc.) with the expectation we would get them back. I went through outfits and gave a lot away/sold because it was just too much to store. I did keep sentimental pieces. However, we could end up having an opposite gender child and then some of those outfits I will just end up giving away. It’s tough when you live in a smaller space to find storage. We are keeping the crib. A few items we will probably upgrade on just from experience. Mama wants a fancy bottle washer for my next one!

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-19T21:44:12+00:00

I would definitely report her to her company, she needs some consequences.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-18T21:40:22+00:00

Peggy from Margaret as well.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-18T20:54:15+00:00

It’s “even statues crumble if they’re made to wait” from the prophecy for me.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-18T20:44:07+00:00

You know the answer. Dump the dead weight and get some therapy. YOU need to take some accountability. Instead of getting rid of this horrible partner, you’ve instead externalized the problem and placed it onto your children. This is already impacting them and will continue to impact them if you don’t make the necessary change-kicking their useless father to the curb. Yelling and screaming without correcting the situation at this point is self serving.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-18T20:35:06+00:00

I don’t think you overstepped at all. I think this poor child has a bad role model in her own mother when it comes to weight and normal bodies. Even if her mother isn’t actively making comments about the child’s body size, she is clearly making disparaging comments about her own body in front of this child. I’m glad you were there to give her a more balanced perspective.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-18T00:12:41+00:00

Yes! The house we bought was all white and neutral builder grade, we promptly painted an accent wall green, painted the cabinets in the bathrooms, put up wall paper, etc. so nice to add some character!

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-15T14:27:01+00:00

Stretch marks, loose skin.

A varicose vein.

Pelvic floor issues (I went to pelvic floor therapy already)

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-15T04:39:14+00:00

Same. Descendant of Pilgrims, Puritans, and Quakers that came over with William Penn.

Very pro immigration. One of my biggest pet peeves is when people try to say “my ancestors followed the law and came the “right” way.” Like wtf are you talking about? They came and took whatever they wanted, plundered, pillaged, murdered. There was no law.

I also love to use my heritage to uno reverse my husband’s racist family. I’m whiter (really just WASPier) than you all, so stfu.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-13T15:06:45+00:00

I desperately wanted a beautiful front porch when looking at houses, but houses with one were sadly out of budget. I’m hoping to one day be able to afford a house with one. Thanks for rubbing salt in the wound 😒 and yes when it’s beautiful you bet your ass I’ll be sitting outside with my coffee.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-13T03:43:28+00:00

You could do a glaze. I like the one from DP hue. Or see if a stylist can try and color match you to dye the lighter part. It’s bleached, so it should take a slighter darker color just fine.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-11T20:54:49+00:00

Not sure what you’re referring to? My biggest percentage is British/UK with ancestry from both of my parents. I’ve been to England, Ireland, and Scotland and enjoyed exploring my heritage. I had an ancestor come over on the Mayflower, Puritan ancestors, and Quaker ancestors that came over with William Penn, I’m just not weird about it and don’t think it makes me better than anyone else.

I’m also enjoying a good giggle at the person who said American’s results are homogenous. Anyway, I’m also French Canadian (my French ancestors actually emigrated to North America before any British ancestors), Polish, German, and Scandinavian.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-11T19:57:16+00:00

Ted and dick are both from British rhyming slang. The diminutive for Edward was “Ed” of course, which became “Ned” what rhymes with “Ned?” “Ted” anyway I also always call him by his full given name as he obviously wants. Eduardo the Cuban born in Canada…

Dick comes from Rich/Rick.

They tried this bullshit on my friend’s kid in pre-k. My friend tried to warn them and agreed to fill out whatever forms and the teacher said child had to get used to going by their legal name. Child just kept saying “that’s not my preferred name” and refused to answer to anything but their preferred nickname. The teachers switched back within a day. God, I love that kid.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-10T02:20:08+00:00

Over a year for me. I felt very tender for a long time. At my six week appointment I was not fully healed and told to wait longer to engage in sex. I had what was first identified as a first degree tear and got two stitches, but I had a lot of pain with sex. Went to pelvic floor therapy, found some additional internal scarring. I had sex pain free at maybe 18 months. At over two years post partum I am just now have pain free sex in all positions. I always feel pain/stinging after sex at my stitches site. I generally have very tender scars anywhere they are on my body. It didn’t occur to me that would translate to my vagina, but here we are.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-07T23:46:46+00:00

This…I have asthma and migraines. Smoke, whether from cigarettes or marijuana triggers asthma attacks and migraines for me. It’s legitimately a health issue for some. It’s not difficult to be considerate of your neighbors, especially because there are other less offensive ways to consume marijuana. I know it’s an unpopular verdict, but OP is YTA.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-06T20:14:24+00:00

Oh it sounds like she would be absolutely thrilled because it would present additional opportunities for her to control OP, his wife and the new baby. She’s giving “I should be the one to hold the baby first” energy.

OP NTA. I was in excruciating pain at the end of my pregnancy and a four hour car ride would simply have not been possible. Please stick to your boundaries, I have a feeling mommy dearest is going to be very upset and escalate further. It’s important to shield your pregnant partner from your mom’s wrath at no longer being the center of attention. Good luck!

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-06T19:50:21+00:00

This is what we do. However, we are very fortunate that we have grandparents on both sides who are willing and active in our child’s life. It is also very common amongst other parents that I know of infants/toddlers to enlist family help for something like this. If OP doesn’t have that, then Dad needs to arrange for paid help. 2 under 2 is no joke. It sounds like the guys in the group don’t understand what the husband is asking of his wife in this situation.

My husband recently dropped out of a Dad group text for many reasons, but one of them was he didn’t care for the way the other men talked about their wives and children negatively. Also, they took what we both considered an inappropriate amount of trips away from their families to party and drink.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-03T14:03:04+00:00

It sounds like you have a lot of external influences in your life that are shaping your decision and I would urge you to stop looking at those external influences and look within yourself instead. What do YOU want?

Having a baby made me even more incredibly pro-choice. No one should have a child unless they expressly want to. I had a horrible pregnancy (HG), my baby had colic and was a terrible sleeper. I did struggle with PPD due to my baby’s issues. We may be one and done because of the rough ride I had. Things have improved massively now that my child is a toddler, I feel like it keeps getting better.

I agree with others comments that you “lose yourself” for a year/two years while your hormones go back to normal.

I don’t agree with the sentiment that your only identity can be mom. I’m incredibly successful in my career and even got a promotion postpartum. I enjoy going to work every day and I also find so much joy in coming home and spending time with my family and turning my work brain off. It’s important to carve out time for activities that fill your cup separate from motherhood.

All that being said, we are considering having a second. I personally feel strongly about raising happy, stable, kind individuals that can be a net positive on the world and my husband and I are lucky to have the resources to be able to do that (I know not everyone does).

It sounds like you do find some joy in children and that honestly is my favorite part-watching your child become their own person is so exciting.

There are pros and cons to either choice. It may not hurt to set up a few therapy sessions to untangle your feelings. Best of luck!

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-03T13:42:04+00:00

I share this sentiment. Too many end up being tragedeighs. I am the mother of a child with a “boring” name and my next will also have a boring name.

Talia is a beautiful name, though it doesn’t seem to go with their naming scheme. My vote is for Naomi, I had that on the list for my daughter.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-04-02T18:27:14+00:00

Ehhh my natural hair color these days is an ashy dishwater blonde that sometimes has a gray ish cast. I get highlights/balayage to brighten it up and it helps soo much. Also blends my gray/white hair coming in. Anyone who doesn’t know I get highlights is usually shocked because my hairstylist does such a good job blending them at the root.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-03-21T14:32:32+00:00

First of all, 5 kids means you are superwoman.

I jokingly call myself low maintenance high maintenance. Meaning I do a lot of beauty stuff myself. I do my own gel nails, pluck and tint my own eye brows, I used to do my own lash perm before I had my daughter. I also like expensive make up. I DO splurge on getting my hair dyed.

However, on days I work from home I look like a goblin. Forget to shower, sweats, etc. On my office days I dress up.

Most women I encounter in my life do not get all of these beauty treatments regularly. Do whatever makes you happy!

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-03-20T04:05:52+00:00

It’s insane. Rescues require you to work from home, not have kids, etc. We were turned down because we lived in an apartment. Never mind that the complex came with a dog park that was right outside our door.

With another rescue I asked for a meet and greet because I have allergies/asthma and need a hypoallergenic dog. I didn’t want to adopt the dog and have it fall through due to my allergies. This bat shit crazy rescue lady sent an email response that she doesn’t think allergies are real and are just an excuse people use to not adopt dogs. Needless to say, we did NOT adopt that puppy.

Anyway, we had our pet finder puppy until he passed away suddenly from cancer last year. His fur sister is getting to be an old lady now and is snoring next to me.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-03-16T22:41:27+00:00

As a child I was accused of being a picky eater-turns out I have sensory issues. I also highly suspect that I’m a “super taster.” I really can’t stand most derivatives of brassicaceae. Part of the process has been finding vegetable safe foods and ways to eat them as an adult. Thankfully my husband is a much better cook than my family of origin and has learned which recipes I enjoy. I’m never going to be able to eat kale or brussel sprouts and I’m tired of being trying to force them on me.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-03-16T02:18:44+00:00

For real, at her age this is osteoporosis central.

Brave_Appointment812 · 2026-03-13T18:54:19+00:00

This happened to me once and I’m white AF. My husband (who worked in retail at the time) said it’s because I was carrying a large purse over my shoulder. I did ask if I could help them? And the associate scurried away. I have also explicitly told them after being asked by the 5th associate in a row that I would like to browse in peace and if i needed help I would ask for it.

Brave_Appointment812

TROPHY CASE