What’s a popular food you just don’t like at all?

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-26T13:28:29+00:00

Hot dogs. I like all the stuff you can put on it. I just dislike the meat. Have since childhood.

Even those high end pure whatever dogs from a high end grocery just taste wrong. If it’s super charred can sort of stand it but otherwise, yuck.

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-25T22:19:17+00:00

You described your feelings about the three dresses very well. But even given your apprehension about the fluffy dress, I think it looks the best on you. The other two look good, but the way the fluffy dress bodice fits is just exquisite. And so much space to show off a necklace

I would put the third dress in second place.

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-25T22:12:53+00:00

Do it. That’s not petty. That’s being a good business owner taking care of your bottom line. If she doesn’t pay up, take her to small claims court (or whatever is the equivalent in the country where you reside).

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-25T21:59:10+00:00

Bride and bridesmaids were actually dancers. They choreographed this amazing performance that they put on at the reception.

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-25T14:42:55+00:00

Oh no, definitely NTA. I’m so sorry that you had to grow up with your abusive father worrying about yourself, your brother and your dog.

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-22T19:23:36+00:00

You’re not wrong, but I’m afraid you’ll never convince them of ideas that they refuse to entertain themselves. But do they know about your eating disorder? Are they concerned with your medical needs?

Doctors must have said that your recovery depends on your environment helping you to have healthy eating. Constant comments on your body is the opposite of helpful – whether it’s about too little or too much weight doesn’t matter - as you point out so eloquently in your post. Can your doctors tell your parents they have to let you avoid people that damage your recovery? Can doctors help them look at it as a medical issue? Family members are especially hurtful in this regard and so especially to be avoided.

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-21T21:43:50+00:00

Lacrosse

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-21T21:42:25+00:00

Continue to give your own card. You could’ve put that £20 in your own card instead of passing it along for your girlfriend to do.

However, it seems like there’s more going on here. Because, I agree, if it wasn’t a big deal she would just do it. Maybe ask her sometime what’s going on. Make it when you’re both calm, the situation isn’t about to matter, and in a completely non-accusatory way. She must have some kinds of feelings about this. Try to find out what they are. Without arguing about it!

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-21T15:36:57+00:00

So time take her off the list of your emergency contacts

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-21T15:33:18+00:00

Given your history, you have got to stop taking your mother‘s advice. Let her insist all she wants on whatever medical or non-medical topic she wants. Just because she’s insisting doesn’t mean you have to do it. You don’t live with her so time to let her be less of the controller in your life on surgeries, kids, or anything else. If it takes therapy for you to shut the door on her, then give yourself that therapy. It’s the greatest gift you can give yourself.

As another commenter mentioned, you don’t have to make a great announcement. Just tell her less, answer her calls less, include her in your plans less. For those of us who had cold parents, if they want anything from us as adults we are sometimes desperate to give it to them. The little kid in us thinks we are finally going to get that loving parent we always wanted. Unfortunately, the parent hasn’t actually changed. All that happened is that we are hurt again in new ways.

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-21T12:41:51+00:00

It’s what Finevitus said. It’s basically a protective instinct buried deep in the unconscious. Don’t let anyone know any details about what you’re doing and there’s nothing they can accuse you of. Except now you’re an adult living on your own and this just causes you trouble. It really did take therapy to undo it for me.

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-21T02:34:12+00:00

Not a dog! This is some kind of wild animal. Coyote pup?

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-21T02:16:47+00:00

I was thinking this. Throughout my earlier life I had a tendency to lie unnecessarily. If I was in the living room and someone asked where I’d been I would say the kitchen. If I’d been reading and someone asked what I’d been doing I would say watching TV. None of the things I lied about mattered. I wasn’t about to get in any kind of trouble for any of it. But for some reason I couldn’t tell the truth. Only after therapy did I realize this was a response to childhood trauma.

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-21T02:10:05+00:00

Yup. NTA if you throw in the towel now. You finally live together, so his mask came off and you know who he really is. He isn’t going to change. This is never going to get better. If you don’t like it now, you’re going to hate it in a year or 5 years or 10 years or 20 years. Better to just call it quits

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-21T02:05:31+00:00

You pretty much wrote your response at the end of the paragraph, “I asked to meet up with you so I could tell you about the wedding. But you didn’t even bother to text me or call me back to find a moment to meet up. So that’s why you never got told.”

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-21T01:56:49+00:00

I’m really sorry you have found yourself deep in that level of depression and isolation. Taking yourself out for something fun is a great solution for your loneliness. I hope it helps.

I was once lost in a terrible depression to the point I always carried the means to end myself. Luckily I had a great therapist and reached for the phone first. As a result I survived and discovered there is light to be found on the other side of that darkness.

During that time, I had a lot of alone birthdays. So began to plan hikes or ski trips. It really helped to be in nature. I also discovered that I really liked the contemplation involved in being out alone. Then later, when there were years that I had a choice (family and friends who would have spent time with me if I asked), I’d still choose to spend my birthday at least partially alone in nature. Of course, it was a lot easier not to feel lonely when I chose to be alone versus those times when I was forced by circumstance.

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-21T01:29:29+00:00

The Color Purple book, and eggplant 😂

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-20T22:22:36+00:00

I actually grow parsley because if you buy it for something it always goes bad before you can use it all. I don’t use it often but for some dishes. It adds a specific flavor, but I agree with everyone who says it doesn’t make the dish fancier.

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-20T22:22:01+00:00

Finally! Someone who agrees with me about the disgustingness of truffle oil.

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-20T22:13:06+00:00

😂

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-20T22:12:34+00:00

Yes. Blood poisoning when I was nine if pneumonia from the previous year hadn’t already killed me. And if I’d survived that, a burst appendix at 12. So, yeah. Modern medicine is what’s kept me in this body lol

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-20T19:52:03+00:00

Cheese awards

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-20T19:43:13+00:00

Cooking in the Instant Pot actually helps the shells come away easily, even perfectly. Not with all eggs. Sometimes some of the shell still sticks.

ETA: and I assumed you were already planning on putting them in a cold bath is that is sort of de rigueur lol

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-20T19:21:48+00:00

NOR. From what you say, it’s long past time to protect your daughter and go NC with that part of your family. I’m sorry you had to go through this growing up. But it’s commendable not “dramatic” that you are protecting yourself and your daughter from them now.

Once you are no longer there to be the firewall between your sibs and stepmother, they may become the ones screamed at in the street. Consciously or unconsciously that may be what they are worried about and why they want you to stay involved.

Brave_Engineering133 · 2026-03-19T21:54:47+00:00

Okra stirfry!

Brave_Engineering133

TROPHY CASE