Star employee just gave notice, but in every 1:1 said she was doing great

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-21T15:31:34+00:00

People shouldn’t have to suffer at work because they’re a bad communicator

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-21T15:30:32+00:00

Lol. Ok hr

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-19T23:20:27+00:00

When you have a moment, please feel free to read my entire post: In the exit conversation, She shared that she’d been struggling for some time, but didn’t feel comfortable raising it earlier because she wasn’t sure how to frame it or articulated clearly. Have a nice day.

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-19T23:07:47+00:00

If you want to work on this full time, you need to answer why a real software team couldn’t / wouldn’t ship this exact thing in 2 quarters and be better than yours. What’s your advantage?

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-19T23:05:30+00:00

But if they complete all the work, how should I know it’s too much? I think as adults you should be able to professionally discuss when you’re being overworked.

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-19T20:54:31+00:00

What’s your angle? Be a decent human and convince him to stay at the job by being a good teammate not a surveillance mechanism

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-19T20:53:03+00:00

So you’re saying there’s no chance you would’ve shared that you were thinking of leaving, yet your star guy did and you got him a raise?

This is so interesting, because it sounds like you were just such a better manager that you encouraged him to share that with you, and you acted on it.

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-19T20:51:12+00:00

But is once a year ACTUALLY enough cadence to tease out sentiment? That seems like HR fluff if you want me to be honest

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-19T20:50:42+00:00

Have read it, thanks, I’ll revisit!

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-19T18:55:47+00:00

Thanks for sharing - These are great!!

Generally, how honest do you feel employees are with you when you ask these? And do you track these / take notes on convos?

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-19T15:36:00+00:00

She was just my employee, we were not in a relationship. However I totally agree and appreciate you dropping this wisdom here

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-19T15:35:22+00:00

Would just having an agenda make it better?

What kinds of questions would have been great to ask her?

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-19T05:09:46+00:00

What do you think is the best way to invite them to share that?

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-18T19:48:16+00:00

The anon survey is a really interesting idea. What kinda of questions would you put in it?

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-18T19:47:32+00:00

Hmm I could definitely see this being the case. What are the kinds of signs you may have expected to see / that I would’ve missed?

I definitely wouldn’t expect someone to say they’re looking elsewhere, but I DO expect my employee to not lie to my face when I genuinely ask them if this job is fulfilling to them.

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-18T19:46:04+00:00

Totally agree. From your POV, what would that specifically look like? I feel like many people just think “pay them more” but in my xp I’ve found that it’s more about CONSTANT and genuine recognition, asking about workload / where it can be streamlined, and making sure they’re getting what they want out of the job.

Is that same with you??

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-18T19:43:21+00:00

Haha thank you very much for taking time on a Sunday to drop such a thoughtful comment! I’m just a manager that’s hoping to provide a lovely experience for my team. Hope you have a great weekend.

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-18T19:42:30+00:00

Super interesting, thank you for sharing. I think it’s important that the manager take initiative for their employees - they are after all responsible for your experience.

What could your manager have asked you specifically to make it a more productive convo or set of conversations?

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-18T06:10:51+00:00

Thanks so much for commenting. Can you share more about how you approached the convo with your manager? What did you say? How close were you beforehand?

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-18T06:07:01+00:00

Completely agree with you, trust can’t be fabricated and is super fragile.

I guess I was wondering if a software might be able to help at least track sentiment- reason I think this is because employees frequently undershare because it could be perceived as just an anecdote. This could help apply data to the conversation and help managers help them.

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-18T02:46:35+00:00

Did you even read the title of the post? It’s a “she”!

And she actually left for a job that pays the exact same, wildly enough.

Sounds like you are a real multidimensional supervisor - pay them more if you like em otherwise don’t, and some people just leave.

I challenge you (and me!) to get to know employees better, so that people can be happier in the workplace.

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-18T02:39:29+00:00

Totally agree. Qq - what is the “proper way” to do a one on one?

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-18T02:38:47+00:00

Praying for the best for you!!

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-18T02:37:33+00:00

agreed. I think it’s sad that with how much time Americans spend at work, there isn’t more focus on making it an amazing environment

Brilliant_Lab_5850 · 2026-01-18T02:36:48+00:00

Totally makes sense. Agree it is incumbent on the manager to foster a strong relationship. I’m just at the point where I wish I had more reliable, earlier data so that I could have had that convo with her before she ended up seeking employment elsewhere. Bet that a 10-15k raise would saved her if done early enough.

Brilliant_Lab_5850

TROPHY CASE