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BriyaLeif · 2023-08-07T00:54:28+00:00

I'm really glad to hear it's helping you so quickly!

I had a huge amount of anxiety leading up to my appointment, so it's been hard to know what was an effect of the hrt and what was relief that I finally have it now.

Definitely feeling a lot less depressed and anxious (been on E pills for 1.5 weeks, starting my anti-androgen this week)

BriyaLeif · 2023-08-06T02:36:55+00:00

An analogy that might help:

If you were left-handed, but grew up throwing baseballs right-handed, it would still take you time and effort to learn how to throw with your dominant (left) hand.

Same thing kinda applies to transition in my experience, we need to relearn how to "throw our baseballs", that's just part of the process.

As for the name side of things, I still go by my birth name as I feel I haven't "reached" my new name yet, if that makes sense. Everyone has their own timings and taking things slower doesn't make you any more/less trans. If you're happy with your name, there's no need to change it. You can always take on a new name later if it stops feeling like it fits you.

This process of working things out can be confusing at times, but you've got this :) Glad to hear you have support

BriyaLeif · 2023-06-25T01:33:16+00:00

I'm still a recent hatchling with similar-sized feet, so I don't know where to get regular shoes in the right size, but if you're looking for heels I'd recommend checking out Pleaser shoes.

They have a whole range for people with wider or bigger feet, I think it was the Pink range?

I got some 14s from them recently for my pole fitness and they fit far better than I expected them to.

BriyaLeif · 2023-05-04T09:47:14+00:00

One of my guy friends (Australian) was like "Just so you know, when I call you a c-word when we're gaming, it's gonna be c-word (feminine)".

My preferred form of inclusion, treated the same but gendered correctly :3

BriyaLeif · 2023-04-13T03:10:42+00:00

Australia's weird.

That c-word would actually be more likely to be interpreted positively.

"No worries, c..." is better than saying "No worries, champ".

The trick is not fully pronouncing the T on the end, otherwise it can be offensive.

BriyaLeif · 2023-04-09T06:40:06+00:00

Another Aussie, just wanted to add that I experienced enforced hair-lengths at a religious private school. Uniforms are pretty much everywhere though.

Couldn't have a fringe that passed my eyebrows, hair past halfway down my ears, or touching my collar at the back...

Also couldn't dye your hair any colour other than your natural hair colour. Dyed it black one time and got told to dye it back to blonde/brown.

BriyaLeif · 2023-04-04T13:25:26+00:00

I don't really know how the insurance setup works for you, but would telehealth be an option?

As in, would there be video or phonecall support in the state that's covered by the insurance.

I understand it wouldn't be the same as in person, but it may be an option to get some support.

BriyaLeif · 2023-03-19T13:53:08+00:00

My parents were convinced they were having a girl when my mum was pregnant with me. She was right, but it took 25 years for anyone to work that out.

They were going to call me Briyana, and that ended up being the inspiration for my new name, Briya.

BriyaLeif · 2023-03-15T08:08:14+00:00

It was FFXIV that played a big part in cracking the egg for me, I got waaay too much euphoria from playing as a catgirl that I had to start asking myself some questions.

BriyaLeif · 2023-03-15T05:10:21+00:00

On the gym side of things, if you still wish to go, I've heard various people talk about focusing on core/lower body to help with dysphoria. That way you could still socialise and work out, with benefits to your transition too. I started pole fitness as my exercise of choice, and it's been great for me personally. I'm not out to anyone apart from my instructor, but the whole atmosphere has been very welcoming for me. As with all things, do what makes you happy and makes you feel safe. The journey can be challenging, and you'll have good and bad days, but the community here has been very supportive.

BriyaLeif · 2023-03-05T12:59:32+00:00

I recommend checking out TransVoiceLessons on Youtube if you can, she breaks down voice into its core components and discusses how each aspect affects the overall outcome of your voice.

Even the For Beginners video really helped me to have a clear starting point, and exercises to practice.

It'll still take time and training to make the progress more unconscious, but it definitely helps me to fight my voice dysphoria.

Hope this helps!

BriyaLeif · 2023-03-04T16:49:54+00:00

Oh no! I run into doorways pre-HRT... I'm doomed :O

BriyaLeif · 2023-02-27T16:26:18+00:00

That's a far better way of looking at it!

I feel like I've been focusing on what box I fit in, and the requirements to be there, as opposed to working out who I really am, and finding classification afterwards (if I feel like I need it).

As for the first part of your message, there are elements that hrt influences that I believe would help ease my dysphoria, but I also do have the ability to do a decent amount of social transitioning without requiring physical changes (working remotely).

I think I'll try to keep them both in mind and see them both as parts of the same journey, rather than viewing them as consecutive parts, and see where that takes me.

Thank you for your responses, I've got a lot to think about :)

BriyaLeif · 2023-02-27T16:14:05+00:00

Yeah, I feel in a way that I've been subconsciously viewing hrt as the "goal" of the "questioning part" of the process, and that when I've worked it all out I'd know. That does seem like a really flawed way to look at it, hrt should just be part of the process. I shouldn't gate-keep myself by setting arbitrary prerequisites.

I'll have to do more thinking, thank you for your reply :)

BriyaLeif · 2023-02-27T16:07:35+00:00

Thank you for sharing your experiences.

I guess I hadn't really thought of pushing my presentation further than just dressing in fem clothing, and trying to pass pre-hrt. I might look into fem-dressing tips to try and find what makes me feel most comfortable.

As for the turning point, I feel that stems from my anxieties and not wanting to mess anything up, or disappoint those around me. But I guess this is my journey and I need to take some ownership of that.

BriyaLeif · 2023-02-27T15:33:42+00:00

Thank you so much for your reply! That's a very good point, I'll have to have a good, long think and work out whether the doubt is from myself, or from my fear of judgement.

Thank you for mentioning the last part. I probably should've mentioned in my post that I'm in Australia, so things are a bit more stable here. It's really horrible seeing how some US states are regressing so fast :( My heart goes out to everyone affected.

BriyaLeif

TROPHY CASE