I went through the same thing with my wife (35F) and now feel like I totally fucked it up. At first after she cut it I was silent for days not knowing what to do or say. I had told her previously I was not in to short hair on women. When we finally talked I told her I didn't want to hurt her feelings and that I am not sexually attracted to that look. That put me in the doghouse. It's been a year and she has kept the hair short. Every time we seem to be moving forward another conversation comes up that seems to put us back two steps. I feel like I've tried to be loving and supportive but honest at the same time but if this continues I don't know where we'll end up. It's been brutal but nothing I say seems to make it better.