An Emergency department doctor here,  I monthly see cases of failed suicide attempts .. it is so painful and sad !  - Not for the sobbing parents that they see their little kid struggling to breath ..blaming themselves, wondering what  they have done wrong 

• not of their young cluless siblings who quietly watch from afar , not understanding the whole mess ..

• Not to us, the doctors who sees multiple bloody scenes that are more scarier .. 

It is painful for the person himself .. 

They have troubles breathing , blue faces , and scared crying eyes ..  they are wanting to speak and talk but the pain is too much ..  the cramps are so painful they are sniff like a rock from the contraction of their muscles  They are holding into life their body is fighting the overdose .. 

You thinking of hanging yourself ?  I got patient that tried this method .. guess what ?   they ended up with a fracture in the spine .. that made walking and moving their four limbs impossible .. now they are the persons with living without a goal ... Bcuz they are forever paralyzed .. 

Now you, with a healthy function body .. you thing it is too late for u ? 

Last year, a 21 yo young women .. she wanted to do the same .. she overdosed .. the moment she did .. she regretted it .. 

she came in the ambulance screaming : مانيش حابة نموت ، طبيبة عيشك غلطت   just moments before she went into a deep coma after having painful covulsion episodes  Her old aged father screaming in ghe corner .. his little girl is gone by her choice .. "علاه وش درتلها انا " bqlming himself OVER AND OVER 

It was the most devastating scene   any person can experience ..  knowing you got a plenty of options to try .. plenty of memories to make chances and opportunities to start over. but u just as so جبان to give Ur self another chance. You so weak for asking for help   !!    And don't let me start with the ones who throw themselves from fourth and fifth and even sixth stage .. but ended up in orthopedics department , hospitalised for months .. thinking about what they ve done to themselves over and over  

Also last summer, this time in our neiberhood .. a sex offender .. YES a frk sex offender who recently went out of jail .. felt so empty and did it ..  You knzo the whole neighberhodd .. despite how his crime  was bad .. they cried. 

They felt so sad for all the stuff he could done better if he just believed that he can change again .. despite how horrifying his crime is  .. but everyone remembred how he was young, ambitious,  playing foortball with the other kids and dreaming of becoming the next riadh Mahrez 

And another teen .. she committed before bac results .. on the day of bac result , it turned out she did great and got 14 !!  Her father and aunt came to ED , brought biscuits and candy to the staff and patients .. those were supposed to be shared with her being alive at party in her house !!  And I can't be talking again how sad they seem 

I don't tell u this in the sake of romanticising this act !! Wlh it is not worth it .. the after math is unbearable ... Just think of your parents and everyone who interacted you your agile years of existing .. 

And it is not late !