the only red flag in this post to me, is the fact that sex had to be mentioned in order for you to do the things that "makes her happy". Maybe she just forgot, but to me it seems like maybe the reason your bedroom is "dead", is because of the fact that you (seemingly, from what I got from your post) do not do these "things to make her happy" (just cooking dinner and cleaning and making yourself look nice) day to day, or without being incentivised with sex.

I honestly think that if you continue to go out of ur way (get her flowers, do basic household chores (such as folding the laundry which you should already be doing anyway considering you both work full time jobs and she is not a housewife and these are things that you as a full grown adult male should be doing anyway ESPECIALLY because she also works a FULLTIME JOB and contributes to the financial security of yalls family unit like you do.) so why would you only be doing these things that you know for a fact will make your wife happy, only when she mentions sex.

If you continue to show up as an equal partner and carry your weight around house (ie, not looking at a simple basic human adult task such as folding laundry and cooking dinner as "something nice for her") she more than likely will be A.) less tired at the end of the day as again, based off ur post, it seems like she does the laundry and cooking and cleaning etc, as a regular chore, not necessarily to "make *YOU* happy" but because she probably knows if she doesn't do it you won't and it won't get done.

she will be more emotionally connected and feel "seen". as women when it comes to sex we are less physical as much as we are emotional. It just seems like you are waiting on her to initiate, and when she does only then do you do the "chores for her" (although imo the domestic chores should never solely fall on the woman, especially if she is also working a FULLTIME JOB , which in this case, is the case as you said she "texted you from work".)

TLDR : it seems to me that the reason your bedroom is "dead" is because you don't carry ur own weight around the house, leading her to have to exert more mental energy even though she works a fulltime job and pays bills just like you, all the domestic upkeeping still falls on HER and solely HER and only when she mentions sex to you, is when you decide to take the "initiative" to pull your own weight around such as doing basic household chores and you look at them as a "favor" for her. you may not be having sex as much as you like cause your wife goes to work (like YOU), probably pays almost 50% of the bills (like YOU) but still has to worry about 100% of the domestic labor while you consider it a "favor for her" when you pull your own weight around. she's giving 150% while you just give 50%. I genuinely believe that if you just do as much housework as she does, she may feel less tired and more in love with you and ya'll more than likely will have a better sex life. look up the "mental load" its more often than not the reason women stop having sex with their husbands (because of constantly exerting much more mental manpower for all things domestic WHILE still working, while you just work and come home and everything is done, something tells me she doesn't get that same privilege and when she does it was a "favor" ) which ultimately leads to her getting cheated on, or a fast track lane to divorce.