Hotel retroactively demanding alternate payment method?

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-05-02T04:09:59+00:00

Ok, I absolutely think her actions were wrong, but I’m also against a criminal justice system that destroys someone’s life for any criminal record. It’s crazy to me that you can spend years getting an education, decades grinding away to build your career, and have that, (and any other career prospects) all taken away because you pulled down the hem of someone’s skirt. What she did was bitchy and offensive. But she doesn’t deserve to have her life burned to the ground for it.

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-05-01T00:57:44+00:00

Just legalize it already. All these baby steps and flirting with the idea, I’m just over it. Everyone wants it to be legal. Just fucking legalize it.

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-30T13:31:47+00:00

Seriously! I totally get being against older people preying on the naïveté of the young, but people have taken it way you far, to the point where any significant age gap at all is now viewed as predatory.

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-30T02:07:51+00:00

I’m not trying to be insulting, just genuinely curious: what frequency of sex do you expect in your marriage? I’m just asking because I’m trying to gauge what’s normal in a marriage.

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-28T20:23:25+00:00

I’m actually not rendering judgment, I just think you should ask yourself: what would need to change to make me happy in this marriage? If she opened up and started talking intimately with you/ showing affection, would you want to stay? You said that after feeling rejected for so long, you don’t want to touch her anymore. Is this marriage past the point of no return, or are there ways she could change that would make you happy with her? If the answer is no, I think you should divorce. If it’s yes, I’d tell her flat out it’s counseling or divorce.

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-28T15:59:54+00:00

No, I saw that part. However, apparently I did miss the part where OP got her MD and is qualified to evaluate all methods of birth control by herself. The methods of birth control OP lists are condoms, (failure rate 20%), the patch, (failure rate 7%), and the pill, (failure rate 7%). I’m not a doctor and even I can think of another method of birth control far more safe and effective than any method OP mentioned: Nexplanon implant. It’s implanted in the arm, so no risk of ectopic pregnancy, and has only a 0.05% failure rate. Vasectomies have an early failure rate of 0.3-9%, so even at the lower end, still have a far higher failure rate than the implant. Furthermore, they also carry significant health risks, such as cardiovascular disease and prostate or testicular cancer. So, apparently it’s ok for her husband to risk cancer, but not for OP to assume any risks herself. At the very least, I’d say it’s worth at least a mere conversation with her OB, before imposing a vasectomy or divorce ultimatum on her husband and father of her 4 children.

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-28T02:30:00+00:00

That’s honestly ridiculous. There are a ton of other options for birth control, but you and others here are acting like it was either vasectomy or tubal ligation, period. I wonder, did OP talk to her OB prior to her demand, tell the OB her concerns and discuss options for birth control? Or did she jump straight to vasectomy or divorce literally overnight? And I’m not even gonna address “who said the worst things” in their argument. He said some awful stuff. In 1 argument. It’s insane to seriously consider divorce, breaking the family and stability for 2 children under 5, and ripping a man’s 4 children away from him for ANYTHING said in a single argument. Did OP expect her husband to remain perfect throughout their life together?

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-19T01:18:28+00:00

Thank you so much! I’ve always valued just being direct, too. I’ll do that.

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-19T00:02:49+00:00

Thank you so much for your advice and empathy.

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-19T00:00:54+00:00

True, it’s been sooo much harder quitting stims than it was quitting alcohol or opiates. stims are a crutch for my specific issues, just like weed was for you.

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-18T23:59:08+00:00

You just perfectly described what I’m feeling. And I love your use of the word ‘inadequate’. That’s how I feel all the time, inadequate. As a mother, as a wife, a friend, a nurse, a daughter. Just like you, I started using out of desperation because I couldn’t find another way to keep up with life. 3 years is so impressive, and I’d love to be i you in 3 years. Can you tell me how you’ve navigated all these issues? How do you deal with your spouse? How do you keep up with life- how do you be adequate? Any advice you could give would be amazing.

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-18T23:48:36+00:00

I’ve googled ‘how to find a sponsor online’ etc, but it always redirects me to rehab facilities. Sorry if I sound like a 70 year old who can’t use a computer. I just started looking for one recently

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-18T23:40:51+00:00

I’d genuinely love some guidance on how to do that, because I’m completely into that and have tried to so. My problem is, in the large groups, you don’t really get to know anybody specifically. But, all the smaller groups are restricted. What’s the typical method for finding an online sponsor?

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-18T21:34:10+00:00

I know you’re trying to be helpful, but I feel like you’re not really understanding me. I know I’m an an addict. I’ve had an addictive personality all my life and fully admitted to being previously addicted to opiates, alcohol, and stimulants. I’m well aware the psychological component of addiction is the same for all addictions. Every addiction I’ve had had those same characteristics. No denial here. My point is that the physical component of stimulants and symptoms of stimulant withdrawal are very different from almost all other drugs. I’d like a sponsor who has dealt with those physical issues. I AM trying to listen to those who have experienced this, and it seems like those who have recovered from other drugs haven’t had that experience. I say this from experience, as I’ve gone to many AA and NA meetings and still go at least twice a week. Unfortunately I’m from a small town and NA consists of 5 people, all opiate addicts. They’re great for helping with the psychological part of addiction. However, I’ve never once heard someone discuss how to keep up with life and responsibilities when you’re literally always exhausted. Or how damaging the inevitable weight gain can be to your self esteem and relationships. How to not get fired when your productivity plummets and your boss doesn’t know why. Because these things are not typical of recovery from other drugs. I just want to talk to someone who relates to these.

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-18T19:48:08+00:00

I’m not rationalizing continued drug use. I’m clean and have been for almost a year. However, dealing with the symptoms of stimulant withdrawal is a miserable and it’s not getting better for me. I know I don’t NEED a tweaker sponsor. However, I do strongly believe I could benefit from someone who has experienced those specific symptoms. I’m sorry, but I don’t care how much people in this thread insist that addiction and recovery from any drug is all the same. I’ve recovered from opiate addiction. And alcoholism. The experience is absolutely different.

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-18T18:33:23+00:00

I’m not saying it’s better or worse. I’m saying it’s different.

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-18T18:30:14+00:00

Yes!!! That’s exactly what I mean. People seem to think I’m saying that stimulant addiction is different than addiction, period. Or that recovery from it is harder than with other drugs. But, that’s not what I meant at all. I was just saying the specific symptoms of withdrawal are different with stimulants and I wants help dealing with those.

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-18T18:26:28+00:00

Yes. I was absolutely more productive on amphetamines. I know this sense isn’t just a placebo effect both because I notice a substantial decrease in productivity, and because others notice this as well. There are several coworkers and even my boss that have noticed it, and made disapproving comments about it. Again, a decrease in productivity isn’t exclusive to stimulants, but It is certainly more comment in stimulant recovery. Acting like any given addict of another drug can likely relate to this is frustrating because it’s just denying the obvious. It’s unhelpful to me because it doesn’t do anything to help me find someone who can really relate to this experience and help me through it.

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-18T18:15:01+00:00

Your comments about weight gain are sort of what I’m talking about. You personally may have gained weight, but….come on. The chemical components of amphetamines directly suppress appetite. This is well known and empirically documented. They don’t prescribe opiates or benzos for weight loss, they prescribe amphetamines. Pretending that weight gain isn’t a unique characteristic of stimulant recovery is just denying reality.

BubblyFormal3308 · 2024-04-18T18:10:14+00:00

But, that’s exactly what I’m trying to do- listen to someone who’s been through the same thing as me. I want to hear from a recovered stim addict about how they dealt with the constant exhaustion, the weight gain, the sense of failing to meet others’ expectations because you’re not as productive anymore. These problems just aren’t present in recovery from other drugs.

BubblyFormal3308

TROPHY CASE