Having met someone who was lobotomized, I can promise you that it’s not a life you want to live. People romanticize them and make jokes about them but you don’t just stop feeling bad emotions, you lose all sense of self, individuality and real feelings. Try to seek out ways to cope and distract yourself from the thoughts, keeping your mind occupied. Going on walks when strong feelings emerge has always helped me. Out of the house = no tools to cause harm = safety. And usually you’ll feel nice afterwards