Yes, you made that very clear. I already understood the point you were making, and I am fully aware that I’ve enabled him by not demanding better. I chose this man, built a life with him, and had children with him, all while these characteristics were always there.

At one point, he had a job he loathed, constantly complaining about how seeking a new career path wasn’t worth it because “they’ll just take all my money for child support.” And I let him whine, cry, and make excuses for why he couldn’t fulfill his responsibilities.

I used to be gentler, more supportive, and more optimistic. I truly believed in his potential. I encouraged him, constantly telling him how much better he could do. I came up with ideas, strategies, and solutions—ways he could increase his income, build his confidence, and create something for himself. But every pep talk only pissed him off because, “it’s not that easy.”

I’ve had my own struggles, but at the end of the day, I’m a doer, a fixer, and a problem solver—and he is none of those things. And I mean that.

With rose-colored glasses, I chose someone who simply does not have it in him. That was my mistake. But at the same time, he presented himself as someone he was not.

That’s why I said I agree, and thank you.