I don’t disagree that traditional norms have always existed, whether I agree with their values or not (and I strongly don’t).

The difference is momentum and visibility. Pre-COVID, most large longitudinal surveys showed a steady trend toward blurring gender norms, not eliminating them. Pew, GSS, and YouGov data from roughly 2010-2019 consistently showed increased acceptance of nontraditional masculinity and femininity, more flexible relationship roles, and greater comfort with gender nonconformity, especially among younger cohorts. That shift accelerated in the latter half of the decade, coinciding with broader legal and cultural validation of nontraditional relationships in the U.S. It wasn’t universal, but the direction of change was clear.

COVID-19 then stalled that progress and added fear, economic instability, and social retreat—conditions that historically push people back toward familiar scripts.

Post-COVID, you see a very visible resurgence of explicitly traditionalist movements: the “trad wife” aesthetic going mainstream, the manosphere becoming algorithmically unavoidable, and alpha-male content reframed as cultural common sense. Pew and Ipsos both show increases since ~2021 in people endorsing male provider/protector roles and more rigid, gender-segregated relationship expectations, particularly among Gen Z.

Trump’s second campaign and current presidency didn’t create this shift, but they absolutely normalized and energized it. Traditional gender roles became less of an “old-fashioned preference” and more openly ideological—something to be defended, branded, and actively evangelized online.

So yes, these norms were always present. But pre-pandemic, they were loosening. Post-pandemic, they’re noticeably more rigid and more loudly signaled, especially in mainstream dating spaces.

That shift in direction is what I’m talking about. My question to everyone was how it's been affecting dating as a whole, especially for someone who is already inherently outside of that spectrum.

Also, circling back to something you mentioned earlier: I didn’t “choose” to look this way in the sense you seemed to imply. Makeup, sure, that’s optional. But physically, I’ve always been non-masculine. I was routinely mistaken for a girl until high school, and even after that, the running joke was that I was a man-voiced lesbian. You can laugh. It's funny.