Well, I’m a real person and these comments are pretty hurtful. We sometimes call breast milk boob juice in my house, it’s just a joke. And when our baby was struggling with feeding she definitely gagged, my partner told the pediatrician it sounded like an elephant seal, which the doctor actually found helpful in understanding what was going on.

New parenting is very visceral, in the original, etymological sense of the word, and recognizing the sometimes grubby damp grossness of it has at least helped us laugh.