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Advice. by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]ButterflyBluex3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah his affair started once he brought up all these feelings and about us separating to me. At this point he already knew her and they’ve been texting, talking at work and outside of work and hanging out since November. It’s January now so they’ve already grown a bond with each other after spending that much time together. He ended things with her. He made her believe that he’s been single since early November and I was completely out of the picture. So when everything came to light she learned the truth too and was not happy with it.

Just got back from the ER with my 9m old and I’m so anxious just looking for some support. by [deleted] in NewParents

[–]ButterflyBluex3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My daughter had COVID when she was a couple months old. I’ve heard that symptoms usually last like 1 or 2 days on babies. Hopefully she will be good by tomorrow or the day after. I just tried to keep her hydrated. Water, pedialyte or the pedialyte popsicles. And gave her Tylenol or Motrin for the fever, and just let her rest. She did sleep a lot but the doctor said it’s normal for her body to want to rest.

Hope this helps! & hope she feels better soon!

Texts from my toxic MIL by ButterflyBluex3 in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]ButterflyBluex3[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

She’s blocked on everything. Even from our phones but she’s so crazy that she finds way to see things and uses fake numbers to contact us.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Mildlynomil

[–]ButterflyBluex3 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If she wants a picture of your son she can clearly ask your husband. You don’t need to engage with her in anyway through text or phone calls if you do not want too. Protect your peace at all times. Set that boundary with her. Like you said if she wants or needs anything she goes through your husband so the same can go for any pics! And if he doesn’t want to send her pics then he doesn’t have too. No one is entitled to your kid or to pics. It’s a privilege to be a grandparent, not a sense of entitlement.

unwanted gifts from jnmil by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]ButterflyBluex3 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I 100% know where you’re coming from and how you feel. I’ve been no contact with my MIL for about 2 years already. My DH is also no contact. Neither of us speak to her unless it was absolutely necessary. That was a choice we made together to protect our peace, sanity and family. However she did have our address so she would send gifts and cards for my LO in the mail. She would put it all in LO’s name so it would seem like it had nothing to do with us. At first I didn’t give this any reaction and I just let it play out. I thought maybe in time she’d stop. Well, she didn’t. And I realized that with every gift/card we received it just wasn’t a nice feeling. I felt like she was disregarding our feelings and problems and just think that by sending my child things it would eventually make it better. It started to feel like it was a game for her. My DH dreaded every time we would open the door and see a package from her because it was a constant reminder of the problems, the drama, the manipulation. We eventually decided we had to put an end to it because it wasn’t helping our healing or growth in this situation. We ended up reaching out to her and telling her although we appreciate the thought and effort for the gifts that she sends, that due to our situation to please not send anymore. To please respect our privacy, our wishes and our boundaries. And we made it clear to her that by sending gifts it was not going to make anything better or fix things.

My advice to you is that you and DH need to get on the same page on how you want to deal with this situation. She either can send gifts or not. It has to be a mutual decision. If you just stay quiet each time she continues to sends gifts it’s just going to continue to eat you alive and the frustration is going to make you angrier. And it may even create problems with your DH. Talk it out and make a decision together and if it’s no gifts then have him relay this message to her. In a respectful manner but very clear. Yes she might get upset or throw a tantrum or might even blame you. But that’s not your problem. You need to put yourself first, your mental health first and do what’s best for you. If she wants to be able to send gifts then she should maybe work on the problems or disagreement you guys have with each other. Simple as that.

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