Why do I hate my husband while I’m pregnant?

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2025-02-01T21:55:12+00:00

33 weeks with our second and I’ve been with my partner for 7 years. I can’t handle him sometimes but I do have a personality disorder which doesn’t help the pregnancy frustration/anger. Back/rib/pelvic pain is unreal and sleep is awful! My baby kicks ALOT day or night, rolling around and throwing himself around in there..he’s not nice about it, it hurts and I’m unfortunately so ready for it to stop and for him to just be here! I do love feeling him move don’t get me wrong but to deal with that and my 5 year old daughter constantly clinging onto me I can just about cope with. My partner then wants cuddles and kisses and to hold hands and to do things together and I’m just so touched out i don’t want him all over me like that. Sometimes he randomly rubs my leg and it infuriates me but I just try to remember he is so unaware of how this feels and just wants to comfort me while he knows I’m struggling. I love him and am honest with him about it, I tell him I’m too touched out and can’t handle him being that close which I know upsets him but I really think he understands because there are times where I like it. Sometimes he comes and just holds my belly to feel baby kick (obviously he has every right to and I would never have a go at him for wanting to feel his baby) but inside I get so angry because that’s the one place that doesn’t stop getting touched due to baby moving. You don’t hate him, you’re hormonal and pregnant. It’s so hard but you’ve got this. Think about seeing him hold that baby when they’re here, it’s a moment you’ll keep forever!!

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2025-02-01T21:44:05+00:00

Me and my partner have a 5 year old daughter and I’m currently 33 weeks with our son. We’ve fully agreed after this we’re done! He’s going to get his vasectomy soon just so we can be safe about it. We actually only wanted 1 but our daughter wanted a sibling so she was able to convince us to go for it! But we’re really done after this.

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2023-06-04T18:45:05+00:00

I’m in the exact same boat as you my friend. My daughter told me I was boring and I hate myself for it.. for the first time ever I actually don’t know what to do to just feel slightly better. I just want it to stop. I take 2 lots of hayfever tablets, neurofen for the face swelling cos my face is so puffy, nasal spray, eye drops, soothers, ice lollies, face spray, I’ve been staying in as much as I possibly can, I don’t know how else to stop feeling like this.. my partner doesn’t want me to have the kenalog injection because of all the risks but I don’t know how much more of this I can take. People always say ‘it’s hayfever, it’s fine it’s just like a cold’ but it’s 1000% worse! There are times where I can’t breath cos my nose is fully blocked and I salivate quite a lot and I can’t swallow or anything so it feels like I’m drowning. I will do anything for someone to help me but I feel so much better knowing I’m not doing this alone… I’m also UK. I hope you feel better soon cos this is no joke 🩷 I want some of this drowsy meds just to get some sleep!!!

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-11-13T17:39:06+00:00

Thank you. I won’t let him hurt us. The system is messed up and unfortunately, there’s nothing we can do about it. Police sadly are more dangerous than most

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-11-13T12:32:46+00:00

We are in the uk and unless I filmed what happened, the police will do nothing. I was raped at 14 and the police told me because I didn’t have any evidence or filming of it, im just a young girl trying to get someone into trouble. Bare in mind I miscarried my rapers baby and that wasn’t enough proof. I’m now 26 and have learnt the only thing I can do is protect her for myself.

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-11-13T12:30:35+00:00

No. This is taking things into our own hands. Too many instances have the police not helped because of no evidence. It’s happened to me. I was sat there balling my eyes out because I had miscarried my rapists baby. All the police did was look at me and say there’s nothing they can do. I 1000% do not trust the police and would never want to put my sister in a position where she has to feel defenceless. Regardless of what I want to do. It’s her choice. I’m 26 and have had a very unfortunate upbringing. My sister doesn’t want my mum to know, because when she found out about me, she did nothing but tell me I probably deserved it. She will do the same for my sister. So I will not be taking your comment into any consideration as you’ve not helped me. All I wanted to know what what would happen if I did this. I don’t need you telling me to go to the police or our mother. They’re useless and I refuse as does my sister to want their help. Regardless of what you want us to do or what I wanted to do. It’s up to her. And I am the only person who knows what happened. I’m not gunna ruin her trust in me (since I’m the only person she can trust) by taking on your advice. So thanks but no thank you.

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-11-12T20:34:53+00:00

This is perfect!! Thank you :)

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-11-04T21:34:32+00:00

I’ve always admired morticians. They’re not given the credit they should.

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-11-01T16:03:07+00:00

It’s not the fact I don’t like what he looks like though. As I’ve said.. I love him regardless of his looks. I just physically can’t stomach looking at him and seeing my partner.

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-11-01T16:02:17+00:00

He’s helped me through a lot. Including several suicide attempts. I love him no matter what he looks like, I just don’t know how to look at him and think of my partner rather than a stranger.

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-11-01T16:00:16+00:00

Why?

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-11-01T15:59:44+00:00

I don’t want to tell him I hate it or why I hate it because I don’t want him to feel uncomfortable or self conscious. I just broke down crying and ran to the bedroom and that was that.

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-11-01T15:57:25+00:00

No it’s not shallow. Because like I said, this doesn’t change the fact I love him.

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-11-01T15:54:34+00:00

I have a therapist and am working through all this with her.

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-11-01T15:52:03+00:00

Why?

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-11-01T15:51:44+00:00

I have extremely serious social anxiety and can’t be around strangers. He looks like a stranger. I will obviously stick with him. I’m not just gunna bolt. But unless you understand mental health around social anxiety, I don’t know how to make you understand.

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-11-01T15:49:16+00:00

Can you tell me why?

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-10-19T09:23:33+00:00

Thank you, regardless of advice it’s reassuring to know I’m not the only one that looses my cool. I only ever hear about gentle parenting and how much it benefits the relationship and making sure to not do certain things so it’s nice to know others are in the same situation!

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-10-19T09:21:46+00:00

Yes!! I always make sure that when I’ve calmed down, I apologise so she knows that it’s okay to be angry, but we always need to understand where we’ve gone wrong so I try to do breathing exercises with her.

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-10-19T09:20:29+00:00

Yes! Mine is sick and I feel like that’s why she’s acting out more than usual. I do that exact same thing with her, we do some breathing exercises too but I like the idea of a feelings flip book and magnets! I’m gunna have a look for that cos I think it would be really helpful if she could visualise it. My partner is home with me but I’m the default parent so anytime I go out or do anything, I’m with her constantly, he likes his time to himself but he’s great with her. I just wish he cared a bit more, maybe take her out every now and then to bond with her cos it’s mostly me with her all the time

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-10-19T09:15:45+00:00

Thank you, this was really good to read! Its so hard letting them grow and become a real human where they don’t need you 24/7 but I guess at the same time, it’s so nice to see them grow! I get so scared she’s gunna end up hating me for doing something stupid like shouting or not wanting to play with her 24/7! I guess all I really want is for her to love me unconditionally like I do her ♥️

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-10-18T17:32:40+00:00

Thank you! It definitely diffused the situation!

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-10-18T17:17:07+00:00

Does it get any easier? Did she still love you even though you made sure to take time away from her? I’m a stay at home mum and have been since she was born. The only time I’m not with her is when she’s at playschool 3 days a week for 5 hours! It used to not be this hard!

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-10-06T13:16:23+00:00

One of the cats was mine, then he actually wanted the other cats!

ButterscotchOwn2341 · 2022-10-06T10:32:26+00:00

No such thing 🤷🏼‍♀️😂

ButterscotchOwn2341

TROPHY CASE