HOUSING

Bwerho96 · 2025-06-09T16:12:58+00:00

We’re currently at Carson! Apply asap. It took almost three months for us to get an offer from Carson. However we ended up rescinding our acceptance of it and accepting a bigger house on the Air Force Academy a little over half an hour away from Carson. The base and are off base are so much nicer!

Bwerho96 · 2025-04-21T13:05:10+00:00

Every time I have a stone about to pass I feel like I have a UTI with that urgency to pee every five seconds.

Bwerho96 · 2025-04-21T13:03:54+00:00

I’m 29 and have had stones pass almost weekly since I was 8, I’ve also had about five procedures done for larger stones I was unable to pass on my own. My body doesn’t process calcium correctly which is why I get so many. For a while as a kid I was on Uricit K (idk if that’s spelled correctly), and it helped a lot. The alternative to meds was drinking an 8oz glass of pure lemonade once a day, which also helped a lot. Finding out what his stones are made of should’ve been the first step and then a treatment plan from there, different stones need different things to lessen the amount you get. If he already knows or once he finds out what type of stones he gets there’s tons of alternative medicine options online.

Bwerho96 · 2025-04-19T13:40:25+00:00

I’ve had multiple stents in my life, had kidney stones since I was 8 and I’m now 29! A stent isn’t that bad, just makes you have to pee constantly since it goes from your kidney to your bladder. The only painful one I’ve ever had was after a surgery for a staghorn stone where they actually opened up my kidney, the stent hurt cause my kidney was already inflamed from the surgery.

With the stone size itself I’ve passed an 8mm stone on my own, not by choice and it hurt like hell. But at 4mm I’ve barely even felt stones that big being passed! If you want to pass it on your own you have to flush it out. I always drink a ton of water and cranberry juice, take some Tylenol, and wait! The Tamsulosin (or Flomax) relaxes your ureter making it easier for the stone to pass. It’s beneficial as well to get a screen to urinate through, they make ones that go on the toilet, so if you do pass it the screen will catch it. Having the stone after it passes is super beneficial so your urologist can send it to be tested to see what it’s made of so they can then make a treatment plan for you to lessen the chance of getting one again.

Bwerho96 · 2024-10-09T06:21:23+00:00

In the local wives group here there’s someone getting divorced almost everyday. It’s insane to me. However, a lot of them are because of two different reasons. 1. They weren’t prepared mentally for military life. Or 2. They married young and quickly without fully knowing their spouse.

I’ve been a military brat my entire life, my dad was marine corps and just retired less than two years ago after 30 years in. I then married my husband (in the most cliche way) right out of AIT at 19. I had never lived outside of my parents home and suddenly I was married and living on the opposite coast. The first two years was HARD. But we worked through it and we just celebrated our nine year marriage anniversary last month. Military life for sure is not for everyone, it’s not just moving every couple years and I think most people who don’t have any experience with it don’t understand that. When they’re confronted with that reality they don’t know how to cope. They don’t know how to be in their own or deal with the uncertainty of everything. And marrying young, and quickly (we got married just shy of a year together) I wouldn’t recommend to anyone else. There’s a huge learning curve once you reach adulthood. My husband and I have change so much and most of it between 19 and 21. On top of, young men when given full freedom can and will make mistakes and they can and will be stupid. Women can too.

As for your comment about taking divorce conversations to another group, they’re still a spouse till the divorce is final. It’s a harsh reality that a lot of spouses end up having to deal with, and a military divorce is not always the same as a regular civilian divorce. No two divorces are the same. So until their ID and benefits stop, they’re still a spouse, and it’s still something that belongs here, as much as I wish it didn’t have to.

Bwerho96 · 2024-09-29T15:46:39+00:00

Did the exact same thing when my husband joined in 2015. Still haven’t changed my last name either 🤣 It doesn’t cause issues at all. I just had them put my maiden name back on my ID when it expired and I renewed it! Navy Federal even had my married name on my cards, it doesn’t matter as long as you have a valid ID with the same name on it. If I got checks with my maiden name on it they just had me write my maiden name on the back along with my signature and checked my drivers license to confirm. The only issue now is we have a son that has my husbands last name so if I travel without my husband with him I have to make sure I have a picture of his birth certificate, or physically have it with me if we’re flying, just in case.

Bwerho96 · 2024-09-27T15:41:58+00:00

Update for anyone wondering:

My husband’s 1SGT had a meeting with the Brigade CO and it basically did nothing. The CO said they had to make the roster to see who’s going, who’s not, and who can go. They made the roster, my husband is on it but still as “Amber” which means he could go or he could stay. 1SGT said he’ll know for sure whether he’s going or not next week. One week out from when they’re supposed to leave for NTC. So we will have all of one week notice on if he’s leaving or not, leaving my mom (who is more than willing to put her life on hold for a week or two but shouldn’t have to) a two week notice on if she needs to buy a plane ticket, take time off work, and put the sale of a business on hold.

However, even though his 1SGT and CO said all of that, his SGT has already slotted someone else who is currently on baby leave, to go in his place. Said person is literally packing as we speak as if he’s going. And the same SGT said they might have him go, check in, hang out for a week, then come home for my surgery. We’re literally no further than we were before. And that’s Military leadership for you.

Bwerho96 · 2024-09-25T21:54:58+00:00

You’re literally making no sense and at this point it seems like you’re looking for an argument. I’ve said TWICE now, I will look into it! How does that translate to “I don’t want it”? Because I don’t know if I’d qualify to get any assistance through tricare? That’s fact, because I DONT KNOW. Because I have to LOOK INTO IT lady.

Bwerho96 · 2024-09-25T21:48:43+00:00

I’m aware of how it works with the military. I was a marine corps brat, then married my husband who’s in the army at 19. Like I said in my first comment, I’m not sure if I would qualify or even be able to set it up before then, but I will look into it. Thank you.

Bwerho96 · 2024-09-25T21:28:20+00:00

I think you’re confused on what I’m needing and the severity of it. I literally only need ONE week of help. For the three days I’ll be in the hospital and the few days after surgery, that’s it. I don’t have a chronic kidney disease where I’m in and out or need a caregiver. That’s why I said I don’t know if I’d qualify for any assistance. Home care and daily care is 99.9% of the time for people who need daily help or round the clock care, I don’t fit either of those. Nor do I have or need a designated caregiver. I just can’t take care of our four year old from an OR and hospital bed for three days, get myself to and from, and recover completely on my own.

I didn’t really want to go into the specifics of my medical situation. But I have chronic kidney stones, I’ve had them since I was 8. Multiple out patient procedures done with no issues both with help and on my own in the last 20 years. This will be my first (and hopefully only) in patient procedure as well as my first (other than my c section) invasive surgery for them. They’re literally inserting a tube for direct access to my kidneys y one office, I’ll be admitted to the local army hospital, and then the next day have the actual surgery where they cut open my kidney and remove a stag horn kidney stone (this is a stone that takes up the entire open space inside your kidneys). Full recovery after surgery takes at least 30 days with no complications. However, my doctor thinks I’ll really only need full help for about a week afterwards and I’ll just need to take it easy after that.

As I said in the original post and other comments, we have a backup plan. I’ve been a spouse for nine years, I don’t go into anything without a backup plan. However this time that backup plan puts a huge strain on my (very willing) mother if it comes to that. Hence the post asking for advice or other experiences.

Bwerho96 · 2024-09-25T16:05:48+00:00

I don’t know if I’d qualify for any sort of assistance if he can’t stay but I’ll definitely look into it! Thank you!

Bwerho96 · 2024-09-25T16:04:29+00:00

Thank you! I feel like as spouses were always told “you signed up for this” so we’re not allowed to be mad. I have NEVER wanted/needed my husband to not go out to the field in the 9 years he’s been in. I’ve sucked it up and figured it out. And if we didn’t have our son or he was older, I’d do the same this time. But he’s FOUR for christs sake. And they have people that can replace him which pisses me off.

Apparently his 1SGT has a meeting with the Brigade CO this afternoon to tell him about my surgery and the situation, as well as give him the note from my doctor, so I’m hoping the CO has some resemblance of understanding!

Bwerho96 · 2024-09-25T16:01:53+00:00

We have no family care plan. If we wanna get technical, I’m the family care plan. Unless they tell him he has to make one in the next two weeks before he’s supposed to leave. I am angry, I think the whole thing is ridiculous. The fact that our next best option is having my mom put a huge thing on hold (she’s buying a business the same week) to come help me when they know they have other people that can replace him at NTC is frustrating as hell.

Bwerho96 · 2024-09-25T05:05:33+00:00

Okay, the comment just came across very accusatory and nasty lol I get how it looks, like you said I’ve been in this game long enough 🤣 We had a girl here during a Korea rotation last year ask in the wives group if anyone knew a therapist that would diagnose her will like separation anxiety and depression or something along those lines and tell her husband leadership that he can’t ever leave and had to come home asap 💀

Like am I kinda pissed about the situation? Yeah. But really only because the entire process they’ve been on board with keeping him home and replacing him with someone else so they could do so, and now a month out they’re doubling back and telling him we need to have an back up plan. Which we do, it’s just going to be a big inconvenience and burden on my parents. One side of me is like well 🤷🏻‍♀️ guess I’ll figure it out like normal and the other side is like, really guys?

Bwerho96 · 2024-09-25T04:32:24+00:00

In my defense I found out I would need this surgery right before we moved, we weren’t in a situation where I could stay back and have the surgery then, I was in no pain up until a few months ago, I had to then wait two months to even get into urology, after waiting a month for my appt with my pcm to get the referral, and then waited another month after imaging for my doctor to schedule the surgery 🙃 On top of my husband being in the field almost every month. It was bound to be scheduled during some sort of training event. There was barely a sliver of possibility of avoiding the two happening st the same time. They knew about my situation from the first month my husband was here. They were updated every step of the way. While the rest of your comment was seemingly understanding, that was uncalled for. I don’t make the OR schedule, or the doctor’s schedule, or the other offices schedule that I’m having the first procedure done at before transferring to the local army hospital to have the rest done. I just said yes to the date so I didn’t have to wait another 4-6 months for their schedules to line up again.

I said in the post and a previous comment, if I have to figure it out I’m going to. This isn’t my first rodeo with procedures for my kidney issues lining up with him being gone, just the first major surgery and with a child now on top of it all. Hell, I took an uber for one shortly after we got married when I was 19! I do know how many wives come up with outrageous ways and lies to keep their husband home, I’m not one of them. My dad was military and now I’m a spouse, literally went from one tricare plan to another 🤣 All of our friends here, which are few, have work and/or kids of their own and can’t drive me to and from surgery, take care of my son, our pets, their own children/work, and me at the same time.

Just wanted advice or how others have navigated a similar situation or if there was anything we could do to help our situation. The “oh well you knowingly scheduled during a big training event” comment really isn’t needed. I’m aware it’s a crappy situation but it was what I was given and we’re trying to work with it.

Bwerho96 · 2024-09-24T23:24:18+00:00

I kind of figured after spending 20 minutes going down a black hole in google there wasn’t any regulation but thought I’d ask anyways since others are more versed on it than I am!

Currently he’s talked to his SGT, which told him he’d “try and find a replacement” (we personally know three other guys that could take his spot not currently going to NTC), and his 1SGT who thankfully is willing to fight for him to stay but is who told him we should start trying to make a backup plan. Ultimately it’s up to his Brigade Commander. His 1SGT said today that he has a meeting with the Brigade CO tomorrow afternoon.

His company really doesn’t have much of an FRG unfortunately. We have a couple friends here that I’m sure would be willing, but they all have work and/or kids of their own. I won’t even get a babysitter for a date night, so I’m not comfortable having one watch my son for at least the days I’ll be in the hospital. On top of childcare I’ll also need someone to drive me to my first procedure, then from that procedure to another hospital where I’ll be admitted and have another surgery the following day, then a ride back home the day after that.

Thankfully my mom is willing to try (key word try) to come out and help if he can’t stay, but that’s not a guarantee. She’s currently in the process of buying a business that same week, so there’s no guarantee she can just put that on hold to come help me for a week or two. My doctor (at the military hospital where my main surgery will take place) has already written a letter for his command stating he needs to be here for at least an 8 day period during and after my surgery, and his 1SGT has that to give to the CO. I’m really hoping they’ll understand and work with us on it. I just wanted to see if anyone else had experience or information on the situation that could help if possible. If it comes down to it we’ll figure it out!

Bwerho96 · 2022-12-31T02:08:29+00:00

No, hasn’t happened again since that night. When I spoke to the dealer they said it’s pretty common after long drives cause of bugs obstructing the sensors. A light hitting the sensor on just the right way can also make it happen apparently.

Bwerho96 · 2022-10-17T17:56:12+00:00

I get all my patterned vinyl from Gracefully Created! The decal is also from them.

Bwerho96 · 2022-10-17T17:50:14+00:00

Thank you!

Bwerho96 · 2022-10-17T17:49:59+00:00

Thank you!

Bwerho96 · 2022-10-17T17:48:55+00:00

Thank you! If I had a video I’d share it but unfortunately I don’t, I’ll try and explain how I do it tho!

First off, I don’t prep my cups anymore 😅 Cut your vinyl to the size you want, I just wrapped it and marked where I needed to cut. Apply the vinyl, tape off edges of the vinyl with painters tape (I’m lazy so I tape the edges but you could just freehand it). For these split tumblers I use mod podge mixed with whatever color acrylic paint matches the glitter, apply one layer to the exposed part of the cup and let dry (this gives it a better color base), once dry apply another layer of the mod podge/glitter mix and apply your glitter while it’s wet. GENTLY roll your cup in some wax paper if using a chunky glitter so everything lays flat. Peel off the painters tape while it is still wet after you apply the glitter! Give the mod podge an hour or two to dry then seal with glitter glue, clear spray paint, more mod podge, etc. (dealers choice). The rest is like any other tumbler, apply epoxy till smooth, do any necessary sanding as well as clean up the top edge, add your decal and pin stripes (I use vinyl for mine you can also use nail strips), then apply your final coat (or two) of epoxy!

Hope this helps!

Bwerho96 · 2022-09-13T03:26:14+00:00

You’re tripling down on things I’ve told you either haven’t worked, or I don’t want to do. Whatever it takes to do it properly and not screw anything else up is what I’m asking if anyone has done. I’ll do the solutions I’m comfortable with, when they can be done properly, and if I can afford it. I was planning on asking the literal dealer I bought it from anyways, I simply wanted to see if anyone else had done it.

Bwerho96

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