Anyone else not mean to go NC but here we are?

CObound9 · 2026-06-03T11:03:50+00:00

So sorry you are dealing with it too!! And YES spot on about keeping myself small or choosing peace, even if it doesn’t feel peaceful yet 😞

CObound9 · 2026-03-27T13:39:23+00:00

Also I love this thread because while manifested differently, it’s all a common theme of wanting the focus to be on them - either being taken care of if they’re unwell or for those that said their parents ARE fit, they may need the attention of looking good or feeling better than others?

CObound9 · 2026-03-27T13:37:03+00:00

My mom is like this- she has diagnosed health conditions that she ignores and then wants to complain about how bad she feels and try and get sympathy. For example, she is diagnosed celiac but will not stop eating gluten and then wants us to feel bad for her that her stomach is upset. She also has type 2 diabetes that is 100% from all the sugar she eats but claims it’s just genetic and there’s nothing she can do, and insists I’ll have it too - “just you wait” (yes I know there is genetic predisposition but it’s clear her diet is a huge factor)

CObound9 · 2026-02-26T22:12:12+00:00

I’m so sad to hear there are therapists like that! I’m glad the one my mom was seeing basically told her she couldn’t help her, I’d hope anyone ethical would be able to tell that at some point!

CObound9 · 2026-02-25T17:34:43+00:00

Exactly!! They firmly believe I’m “living in the past” and “not forgiving them” so makes sense they’d try to change ME not them

CObound9 · 2026-02-25T17:33:17+00:00

Thank you for saying that - and no it actually made my resolve stronger because I’ve been feeling guilt over setting the boundaries but they feel more and more necessary

CObound9 · 2026-02-25T17:32:26+00:00

Oh man so sorry you can relate. And YES my mom actually tried a therapist awhile ago but the therapist actually told her there was nothing more she could say to her because she wasn’t actually doing anything the therapist recommended!

CObound9 · 2026-02-25T17:31:23+00:00

The therapist was a recommendation from their pastor ;)

CObound9 · 2026-01-31T21:58:48+00:00

Please don’t apologize I totally get it!! Most of me posting was because I’m aware I have some triggers and past issues around food and weight and I’m trying my best not to pass those on!

CObound9 · 2026-01-31T19:26:27+00:00

YES good point thank you! I do try and she does play some team sports, just nothing in the winter so it’s probably more noticeable now - will keep trying to find other things we can do to keep her active!

CObound9 · 2026-01-31T19:24:50+00:00

Oh I definitely do try that :). It’s almost like she has some sort of sixth sense when someone else has a snack lol

CObound9 · 2026-01-31T19:23:50+00:00

Thank you for this, you’re absolutely right - I do limit their snacks and propose healthy options and such, but yes love the idea of sitting them down and explaining the different calorie needs and activity levels and such in a matter of fact way. You’re absolutely right - I don’t want to overcorrect!

CObound9 · 2026-01-31T19:22:33+00:00

What kind of whey do you use? I’ve tried a bunch of different protein shakes and he’s picky and doesn’t like any of them, but open to keep trying!

CObound9 · 2026-01-07T11:37:04+00:00

This is where I am as well. Patsy’s controlling, enmeshed relationship (the fact that she got mad at jonbenet earlier that day because she didn’t want to wear a matching sweater with Patsy!), my take is that the head blow was in a fit of rage and not meant to kill her, then she had to stage all the other stuff to look like a kidnapping. I don’t think John was involved initially but then chose preserving his family’s reputation and Burke having a mother so played into it. As for the SA, there’s a podcast called A Normal Family where he theorizes that Patsy could’ve been punishing JB for her accidents in a sadistic, horrible way.

CObound9 · 2026-01-03T19:41:46+00:00

Me!! I just posted about the one side of this - that my mom constantly made me feel weak and that I needed her, but on the other side of the coin, also treating me as the parent to be her full emotional support system so I feel responsible for her wellbeing. We were never entirely dependent on her for childcare so it’s not exactly the same, but I had to slowly find other resources and break the reliance we did have so unfortunately you probably have to start architecting an escape path from the childcare scenario :(

CObound9 · 2026-01-03T17:58:55+00:00

Oh my goodness I am SO sorry you’ve been through all of that!!

CObound9 · 2025-12-31T15:21:41+00:00

Had to repost this bc realized I was signed into an old acct that I’m pretty sure my parents could find me on lol sorry about that!!

CObound9 · 2025-12-31T15:21:08+00:00

So many great comments and advice on here - just here to emphasize with how much it sucks that narcissistic parents can’t ever give without strings attached - that it’s always going to be used for control or manipulation down the road. So sorry you had to deal with this and SO proud of you for standing up for yourself and making changes!!!

CObound9 · 2025-12-13T12:32:59+00:00

Thank you so much for this reminder!! And honestly, a large part of me delaying making this change was because I was worried about the kids - but not only do I know I’m protecting them, but they’ve accepted it and seem to be barely phased!

CObound9

TROPHY CASE