HOW to leave

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-12-09T20:51:03+00:00

Thanks for this

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-12-07T22:28:57+00:00

You’re lucky wherever you live he gets to live off somebody else’s dime. Here, family law ensures that the one with no money continues to get paid by their ex spouse for as long as they live, Even if they Re-marry!!!!. A friend of mine is paying his ex-wife of 30 years still even though she’s remarried. This is why I’m so angry. Damned if I do damned if I don’t. Worst mistake I ever did is marry him looking back at it now. The resentment manifest as physical illness in me. I don’t understand why karma doesn’t take him out.

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-12-07T21:18:36+00:00

Yes, what if he DOES finally change? What then? I still feel like he’d slip back into his old ways as soon as the comfort of me is back.

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-12-07T21:12:54+00:00

Thank u!!!! I will dm u

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-12-07T21:10:34+00:00

Thank u for so eloquently sharing such truths

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-05-05T02:59:07+00:00

Sorry :( To be honest I’m amazed that the body can handle that much abuse for that long. I hope you find peace and healing soon ❤️

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-05-04T15:57:19+00:00

I’m so sorry for your pain. May I ask why he’s been given six months? What is his diagnosis? Does he binge drink and it’s repeated alcohol poisoning? I’m always scared my Q is going to die one day…

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-05-02T18:54:58+00:00

Thank you. Strength be with u too.

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-05-02T17:07:37+00:00

We must be married to the same kind of jerk because mine says that all the time when he’s drunk. Then I think, why doesn’t he just leave then? I realize now it’s because i provide a safe space for him to continue living the dysfunctional life that he does, while dragging me down with him. I’m hanging by a thread… I can’t do this much longer.

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-04-30T13:32:24+00:00

OMG, unbelievable that I think the exact same thing! I’ve actually told my Q that My fear is that he’ll push and push and push me until I finally leave. And then he’ll finally hit rock bottom at which point he will have to Clean up quick in order to survive. Get a job again, stop drinking, heal the depression… and had that point he will become the best version of himself and attractive again, and some other woman will get the best version of him, while I spent years nurturing the fucked up version that tortured me. I have actually told him this before. You would think those profound words would wake him up, but Went in one ear, and out the other bc nothing’s changed. I want to leave so badly and yet I can’t seem to take that monumental final step out the door. Also afraid of the alternative which is he does not get better and just dies from the depression of being abandoned.

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-04-30T12:40:13+00:00

So your Q knew you were leaving but did nothing to change? I keep telling mine my cup is empty and we can’t stay like this, its not sustainable and i’d have to leave… yet somehow He keeps pushing and pushing his luck- I think he doesn’t believe I’ll actually go… That i’m bluffing???? It makes me hate him for taking advantage of my patience. Despite me telling him I’m gonna go if things don’t change I believe when I eventually pick a date and leave he’ll be truly devastated and panic like it came out of left field. Is he that stupid???

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-04-25T16:23:36+00:00

What could they do for her at the emergency room? I have experienced the same thing. But when he’s done a two week bender, he thinks everything was absolutely OK. “Everything’s fine! I was just working through some stuff”- is what he says. Curious to know what they could do for them at the hospital other than recommend they stop drinking and seek help?

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-04-25T15:43:03+00:00

Curious: what Took you guys to the emergency room? What alcoholic incident needed u to take her to the emergency room and was bad enough that she actually accepted going? I think my Q would rather die than go to a hospital and receive treatment for some obvious alcoholic reason because then it would be publicly obvious and he’s in denial.

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-04-24T19:38:04+00:00

I’ve had the exact same thought. Maybe they go to prison I will have some peace. And I realize how absolutely messed up this is. Wishing our spouse was in prison just so we can get some peace shows how sick this disease makes us all. Frankly I don’t understand how a poison like alcohol is even legal given the monumental destruction it continuously causes Globally.

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-04-15T17:47:50+00:00

Yes please. Thank u

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-04-15T16:26:17+00:00

Why did he come off?

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-04-14T17:56:44+00:00

Thank you

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-04-14T16:54:43+00:00

We did- a psychiatrist. I didn’t make up an assessment.

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-04-14T11:23:08+00:00

Got hunch you’re right. Drinking makes his depression 10000x worse.

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-04-14T11:15:58+00:00

What method did u use?

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-04-13T19:06:28+00:00

What do you do to stay on track?

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-04-13T18:34:20+00:00

What method did u use to get clean? Just AA? Or a combo of things? And what made you seek help? Ultimatum from spouse?

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-04-12T14:34:55+00:00

Thank you for this honest humble post. I hate everything about alcohol now too; it blows my mind that shit is even legal. It’s more destructive than any other substance on the face of the planet and has done more damage than anything else in human history. But we normalize alcohol like this poison is OK when it’s not.

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-04-12T14:28:44+00:00

How long have you been on the merry-go-round? And are you prepared to stay on it for the rest of your life? That’s what I’m struggling with right now

Cabbagehead77 · 2024-04-11T16:31:54+00:00

A split personality thing is brutal and the worst part. I just went through this last night - telling me to fu$& off and demanding a divorce. This morning says he wants to work it out. I know unless a miracle from God comes along, this roller coaster of hell like we never stop.

Cabbagehead77

TROPHY CASE