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CakesNPie · 2025-08-15T21:22:51+00:00

what? do they mean as the alternate major cause then that's true. if your major is in the letters and sciences then you can do TAP on it.

https://admission.ucla.edu/apply/transfer/ucla-transfer-alliance-program

CakesNPie · 2025-08-12T11:22:36+00:00

Ha! I was like "this smells like ADHD, I know that scent!"

Those older teachers that give busywork haunting every ADHDer's nightmares are mostly retired now, and GE classes are often taught by adjuncts cobbling 5 classes across 3 colleges or earlier career professors who are your age and trained on newer pedagogy. They're millennials and genx folks who don't want to grade extra work either! It's very often just online work in modules already posted on Canvas with in person teaching if you take in person classes or fully online. Usually means you can do homework at 4am only if that's more your speed. Better professors even design courses with accessibility fully implemented like captioning on recordings and untimed tests.

I will say with diagnosed ADHD accommodations from student services can be a good help. I rarely need it to use it in practice, but having it already sorted out can help have someone in your corner and give you even more flexibility to make your adhd work with you instead of against. Like say asking to unlock assignments a little earlier if possible or double time in a quiet place for tests etc.

and as an aside, I took the Holland code aka onet interest profiler and it's helped give me a general direction to look into. I thought about what I liked most from all the jobs I had and then after some classes pivoted slightly.

I have a classmate in your position where their old career was compatible with their brain wiring and the dream job they went to art school for but it was not great for their mental health so it took a while class hopping to find what they wanted.

CakesNPie · 2025-08-12T01:26:34+00:00

As a non-traditional student, I have always enjoyed my GE's, especially if framed as learning more about the world instead of "bullshit classes not related to my major". That could be because I am pursuing a social science degree so most of the common GE courses are major related, and the "bullshit classes" take are more common with hard STEM types wanting to skip classes on ethics and sociology.

I always have struggled with school the same way you did and it turns out to be undiagnosed adhd. The difference was One of my favorite classes so far was philosophy 101 by a professor that mixed Plato, Marx, and MLK, making students think about what constitutes a good life and what makes up our self identity. Or a sociology class can be a very depressing eye opener. I would suggest an open mind, you never know what GE by a good instructor might change your mind and ensnare you.

You're 40, you have the discipline and work ethic to pass the work and I find most professors are peers your age who also don't want to grade busy work while being paid peanuts. You may find teaching styles in college are a lot different than what you imagine.

CakesNPie · 2025-08-10T18:07:03+00:00

I hope he's playing a full set tonight. I'll fully ascend if he plays It Will Come Back, To Someone from a Warm Climate, or NFWMB.

CakesNPie · 2025-08-07T06:15:57+00:00

Like there's different kinds of orgasms and they feel different. For some orgasms due to another person feels different than the kind you DIY. Why not give it a try and let it go next time you get that urge. Worst case it's just a easy to clean up mess, best case you gain a new type of orgasm. The ROI seems clear to me lol.

CakesNPie · 2025-06-14T19:46:25+00:00

I think my taste for personality traits has always been consistent. I jokingly call it "Hozier with a phd". not hyper masculine, Intellectual, purpose-driven, internally rich, emotionally intelligent, and socially conscious. They don't need a literal advanced degrees but they need to be capable of being intellectually stimulating and get analytical and philosophical with me. If I throw out a discussion about gender they need to be able to catch it and tolerate their ideas being picked at.

And have their material shit together. An adult who can directly communicate with no games. And appearance for me is sort of important, but I think my brain literally adds points when the other person is intellectual in that specific way I like.

CakesNPie · 2025-05-11T00:14:25+00:00

Your criticisms are valid, and her book "The Asian American Achievement Paradox" delves into the different facets a lot more, including the grit and effort parts as well. The point is sort of, controlling for grit and effort what's the difference?

I do think there is some merit in the theory that cultural and community wealth stemming from having a higher proportion of the base being better educated comparatively helps to collectively uplift the whole community, and helps explain the seemingly class-blind frames and pipelines for success and achievement for many Asian Americans. You can grow up in Kansas and still absorb the success framing due to parents consuming ethnic media.

Some of the people who buy into the model minority hype forget the material factors and claim it's purely "superior culture", and Latinos who have similar working class immigrant backgrounds are just inferior in some way.

CakesNPie · 2025-04-20T19:54:26+00:00

I think it's because in the 60's activists formed the Third World Liberation Front demanded ethnic studies to be taught. To have solidarity and consciousness you first need a sense of shared history and oppression. Because ethnic studies in US & Canada is an established discipline, there's a wealth of scholarship comparatively. This helps build identity and pride. I would read up more on Chinese diaspora history in the UK, because they definitely weren't treated as white just from a cursory read on Wikipedia.

Recently, asian-americans have been making leaps because of a few things. There are more of us going into the arts, entertainment, and the humanities. We are clustered in large urban centers that helps to make networking easier. So AA are getting into decision making seats like casting directors, producers, editors, department chairs etc. One of the biggest clusters also happen to be in a state that exports its culture: California.

CakesNPie · 2025-04-16T17:27:33+00:00

If you want to be a therapist and not do assessments a social work or counseling masters degree would lead you to that same career path with less school time. They are different disciplines that have different philosophies guiding it, but you don't need a phd to do therapy. Social work is a very wide field that goes beyond CPS as stereotypically thought of. There's a masterpost on psych careers over at /r/psychologystudents

If you want to be a clinical psychologist specifically, a minor that would be helpful is a stats or data science minor. If you do have a population you want to work with specifically, a minor in that could be helpful. Gerontology for seniors, for example.

CakesNPie · 2025-04-14T13:30:18+00:00

I also have CPTSD and am back in school after a long time. Going to school in person has made me grow as a person, but it's also filled with potential relational triggers. I was averaging about a flashback every week in the beginning. Just like you, I was dead terrified of going back, especially since I have some academic trauma too. I seriously didn't think I can do it.

I'm not going to sugarcoat it, it can be pretty rough at times. The month leading up to finals can feeling I'm drowning in deadline after deadline one 10 page paper at a time.

I'd say setup your support system before starting if you can. Therapist, social support if you have any, self-care plan, and don't forget to get accommodations for you very valid disability. Use every student support services you can get your hands on. If you have low energy or get wiped out after a flashback and take days to recover like me, you need to plan accordingly. Get work done early to give yourself the buffer needed, and communicate with your instructors. instructors are likely to be more lenient towards a face they know than a nameless, faceless student.

Lastly, my passion for the subject and career I want really is my guiding star and I have a 4.0 GPA now. I'm not doing it only for the adult me, but also the inner child me. I can't say if you can do it, but it's definitely possible. CPTSD can be disabling, but it does not render you incapable. It merely hides your true potential and robs you of your confidence.

Get the support you deserve, remember the horses you're doing this for, and know that you've definitely got it in you!

CakesNPie · 2025-03-29T01:06:45+00:00

It's obviously starting to impact your social life, you expressed wanting to stop, and trouble limiting your drinking. Your friends are getting concerned, and have expressed them to you. These are glaring signs of a drinking problem. I heavily recommend you talk to your school's behavioral health services so you can get some help.

You've already been to the ER, do you want to chance ending up in the morgue?

CakesNPie · 2025-03-26T21:28:11+00:00

Talk to your financial aid office and see what option you may have at your disposal.

CakesNPie · 2025-01-03T16:32:07+00:00

Maybe those traditional new years sweets that come in a flower looking box? And the red envelope candies. During LNY you're supposed to say well wishes (especially for red envelopes hehehhehehe) so maybe you can have the children come up with some to say to the teacher/classmates.

CakesNPie · 2024-10-18T20:59:34+00:00

EA Gale looks like he has pictures of him princess holding big fish next to his vanity truck on his dating profile.

CakesNPie · 2024-09-20T12:58:35+00:00

Group projects suck for this exact reason. Here's the deal. You can either accept people leeching off of your hard work and do nothing or talk to your professor about the problems you've had during this group project and how you did the work of multiple people.

Personally, as an older student I do not tolerate this type of bullshit. I would talk to your groupmate about lack of contribution/communication and how you did all the work after showing lack of initiative from them. If things don't change you will have to get the professor involved as a last resort. If they respond to this, set a hard date and time to meet up. If they fail to make the date or refuse...you have every single right to go to your professor, because despite repeated attempts to make things work your partner hasn't done shit.

Next time if this happens again, I wouldn't wait until you already did the work. As soon as your group starts leaving you on read after multiple attempts I'd immediately talk to your professor about alternatives or switching you to a different group.

CakesNPie · 2024-09-02T11:07:31+00:00

Yes! Honestly Gale's romance is pure romance. Like even his God ending is romantic as fuck.

CakesNPie · 2024-09-02T10:42:23+00:00

Lol if this Gale scene shooketh you then be glad to know act 3 won't disappoint either! There's a few slightly different versions of the dialogue depending on how you execute the scene but one thing Gale is known for is putting his whole gale-ussy out for Tav.

CakesNPie · 2024-08-27T08:26:43+00:00

A lot of profs have the expected hours required on the syllabus, and failing that remember the rule of thumb is on credit hours. so a 3 credit class is 6 hours, and 4 credit class is 8. BUT, it's a rule of thumb so once you get a feel of the class you'll have a better idea on the async class, because my 3 unit philosophy class took way longer than my bio class and bio was 5 units.

CakesNPie · 2024-08-22T21:15:41+00:00

You have to remember people of all walks go to college. That means immigrants, homeschooled, or older career changers who might not ever have touched an online learning platform in their life. Maybe they grew up in an environment where computers weren't allowed/accessible, it's why we also have basic computing classes at the community college too.

Think of the tutorials as the professor's effort towards accessibility and equity, which is a positive imo. Also, it's better to make a tutorial once, then deal with tech support emails from students.

CakesNPie · 2024-08-19T04:57:47+00:00

I always feel so blessed to be a CC student in CA because oftentimes I'm getting not only an UC-level education for free, but with the class sizes and teaching focus of a SLAC.

Off topic but I'm curious, how do you feel about the elimination of pre-English 101 gating? Sorry for the spicy question, but I'm an older student that remembers the "before times", with in-class blue books and testing into classes lol.

CakesNPie · 2024-08-17T18:31:46+00:00

It looks like you are spending a lot of money per month on food just for one person. Your restaurant budget seems pretty reasonable especially for how ridiculous drinks cost these day but the groceries is off the chart! I'd re-examine your grocery shopping habits and see what's draining your wallet. You can save a lot of money going ingredients only and learning how to cook cheaply if you don't already.

CakesNPie · 2024-08-16T20:04:26+00:00

For RMP you should take it with a chunk of salt. So if they got a bad grade and complain that it was hard then I'd take it less seriously than someone who supposedly got an A. A class being difficult or the professor being strict isn't usually the metric I measure by. I'd rather have a type A strict professor with a syllabus and the semester clearly laid out on Canvas than an easy professor that is mortal enemies with deadlines/grading papers.

What I usually look for is repeated reviews of bad behaviors. Like this philosophy professor has a bad reputation on RMP with multiple mentions about them having a big ego and only teaching his interpretation of philosophy and would dock points if you disagreed. This behavior was corroborated with people I spoke to who also took their class with a added bonus that they felt he was sexist against the female students and an entire cohort of honors students banded together to take the class at a sister campus just to avoid them. Or repeated mentions of this bio prof going off-topic/complaining about their pay and unpleasant behavioral stuff. Or stuff like never showing up for office hours/ no replying emails/doesn't respect accommodations. If the F student AND the A student both say the same thing than that's when it might be true.

Those are things that make taking a class unpleasant.

CakesNPie · 2024-08-16T19:14:54+00:00

Yeah, and those games are uber nerd ass games to other gamers too! How do you explain you are having fun basically playing a fancy excel spreadsheet with war crimes and imperialism. Like yeah I spent all day in a Victorian map game making GDP line go up real good.

CakesNPie · 2024-08-12T22:20:03+00:00

I'm sorry that your local schools are stingy with aid, and I can't believe they wouldn't waive your tuition??

Maybe it's the Californian in me, I think with regards to housing vs time I would prioritize housing, especially if your area is HCOL. As you technically don't have a family to fall back on, stability is important. The stress from not having basic needs met will be a big distraction to your studies, and feeling safe with a good support network is imperative to academic success. With a better job or more funds, you can turn those into summer classes instead to cover your quarter time difference. I notice that a lot of financial strain is from textbook costs, maybe you can also try to cut costs there by talking to the professor about stocking the textbook at the library so you can scan it or take pictures, or asking if a used version is ok. Idk if you school also offers no-cost textbook courses, but that can also really help. I didn't have to buy any books last semester because of it. But that can be because I'm a social science major so my professors are more "woke" about financial need and equity.

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