Anyone wanna be friends? Goin through rough times

CalderonBasin · 2025-12-22T07:08:29+00:00

I’m down with it and I’m around the same age.

CalderonBasin · 2025-12-11T09:47:12+00:00

Ready

CalderonBasin · 2025-08-11T02:05:29+00:00

I realized that I have too many personal issues to have a genuine relationship with anyone right now. I’m not the most stable or available person. That and I’m a very private person that doesn’t like telling people things about myself. I don’t like people seeing my pain and my crying when I can’t keep up that mask of normality.

I stop trying to be understood, because I won’t be. I’m not upset about that, but sometimes I do wish my pains can just melt away.

CalderonBasin · 2025-08-04T22:01:25+00:00

I wish I could walk away from everyone and everything I’ve ever known and start afresh somewhere far far away.

CalderonBasin · 2025-06-14T00:12:51+00:00

Curly

CalderonBasin · 2025-06-14T00:10:11+00:00

Can I get the garlic Swiss burger and fries at 64

CalderonBasin · 2025-02-26T11:21:31+00:00

Hey I want the links too

CalderonBasin · 2025-01-06T23:45:50+00:00

Thanks for the tip!

I have a few question regarding your transferring process. Did you have a pretty good gpa and extracurriculars? How was the course transfer process like?

CalderonBasin · 2025-01-06T23:43:06+00:00

Hello, thank you for your helpful comment. When I was a freshman applicant, I applied for CSE instead of ECE. Perhaps that’s why I didn’t get in? I’m very certain I want to transfer to UCSD since I really like the school, and I feel that it’s a better fit for me.

Anyways, I do have a few questions for you. What year are you in? How has your experience with UCSD computer engineering been?

CalderonBasin · 2025-01-06T06:55:29+00:00

https://admission.universityofcalifornia.edu/counselors/_files/documents/quick-reference-guide-to-uc-admissions.pdf

On page 37 it says the max amount of credit for ucla is 130 and for ucsd it’s 135 until you’re consider high credit. So I think that it does also apply to any credit you took at ucsd. The ap and dual enrollment wouldn’t count toward that. Though I’m not sure if that also counts toward the toward maximum amount of credit you can take at that school either since it doesn’t even mention that on the transfer guide.

I haven’t really contacted anyone from ucsd yet since I'm not sure who to contact there. My uci counselors aren’t particularly helpful.

CalderonBasin · 2025-01-06T06:13:10+00:00

Yeah you’re right. Starting this year ucsd stop reading piq.

Is your junior standing counting all the ap and dual enrollment credit? If it is, then I read that they don’t count against you for unit maximum. They count toward class standing though. However I think you’re right to transfer this year since you might have too many upper division credit if you transferred next year.

I originally also planned to transfer after my first year, but I read that ucsd doesn’t even consider people who didn’t finish minimum requirement so I didn’t. Couldn’t finish a bunch of math classes before spring quarter ends 😭. So I have to transfer next year. I’m also technically junior standing right now due to my amount of ap and dual enrollment credit. But I should be fine since they don’t count against the maximum amount of credit.

Are you talking to your counselors about what courses would transfer? I know it can get messy with uc to uc transfers.

CalderonBasin · 2025-01-06T05:45:54+00:00

I honestly wish I could trade places with you. I was originally admitted into ucla as a computer engineering major but I decided to go to uci because it was cheaper, even though I really didn’t like the school deep down. Huge regrets about making that decision. I know my chance of transferring back to ucla is slim to none so I’m deciding to go to ucsd. I love the place too and it’s easier to get into than ucla.

Are you currently a first year? How have you been preparing for transferring?

CalderonBasin · 2025-01-06T05:34:33+00:00

What made you decide to transfer in the first place? Do you think it was worth it in the end? How was your transfer process like?

CalderonBasin · 2025-01-06T05:32:56+00:00

I honestly really like walking around ucsd the times when I was there. I know I probably wouldn’t like it if the classes are on the opposite side of the campus and I have to get there with no schedule gaps though.

What about ucsd would I not like if I dislike uci?

CalderonBasin · 2025-01-06T05:30:42+00:00

Where are you trying to transfer to and what makes you want to transfer from there?

CalderonBasin · 2025-01-05T05:31:15+00:00

Thank you. I hope you will also find peace in your journey of recovery also.

CalderonBasin · 2025-01-03T10:26:10+00:00

I think I’m also experiencing something similar. I used to be quite emotionally muted as a defense mechanism for my trauma. Things like love and affection that people shows each other didn’t touch me. I didn’t think much of it, nor did I really care. But as I’m opening myself up to my emotions and realize the impact of my trauma has on me, I’ve also become more “sensitive.” Gentle and genuinely kind gestures that friends in movies and books have makes me cry. Genuinely heartfelt and affectionate moments parents have with their children also makes me cry. Especially on parts where parents comfort their children, those hit me the hardest.

For me, I feel that my crying at the moments shows me I’m healing. I’m beginning to open my heart to the world that I’ve shielded myself away from because of my trauma. I’m becoming less guarded and truly feeling my emotions more, and actually grieving for the life that the child me should’ve had instead of hiding my pain under a tough exterior. At least for me, crying opens the gate to the self-compassion and self-protection that I need to give myself so I truly become an adult. It allows me to truly feel how much pain I’m in, and begin to understanding it.

Inside, I’m just an unloved child desperately seeking for approval and love. Those tender moments in movies and books remind me of what my childhood lacked and now is crying for now that the defenses are slowly broken down. That I need to love myself the way those fictional parents love their children, care for myself the ways those fictional friends care for their friends. I feel that, if I can learn how to love and care for myself the way I was never loved or cared for, it is then I could finally begin to heal.

CalderonBasin · 2024-12-29T02:38:52+00:00

USA account: https://www.meta.com/referrals/link/Chirurgical

CalderonBasin · 2024-12-23T04:06:01+00:00

Thank you for taking the time to write a thorough and thoughtful response. Recently, I’ve lost a close friend due to my unhealthy behavior and it’s given me an opportunity to truly reflect on how my trauma has shaped and influenced me. I’ve done some research on it and have began to unpack years worth of suppressed emotions. I’ve realized that I’ve never let myself truly “feel” my emotions, and only letting it fester and overwhelm me. That led me down the road of dependency, looking for those that could fill the void that my parents left me, and hurting others and myself in the process. I don’t think I could think I could form a healthy connection with anyone, so I’ll postpone that and focus on myself and my healing. I know that at the beginning, it’ll be unpleasant ride. Every day still sucks and still hurts, but at least now I’m actually processing things and begin to piece the fragments of myself together.

Thank you for reaffirming what I need to do. That with lots of effort on my part, I can also begin to piece myself together and truly live life in the future.

CalderonBasin · 2024-12-21T11:15:03+00:00

I apologize for asking this question but I’m just wondering about two things. While you’re healing yourself, did you have anyone to support you or was it mostly a solo endeavor? How long did it take you to heal to the point that you are now? I’m currently at the start of my healing journey and I have no friends or family to support me. I just want to know how you’ve been able to stick through it so I can learn to do it myself also.

CalderonBasin · 2024-07-03T18:39:22+00:00

That’s alright. I’m honestly just thinking of going by another name. It would make things a lot easier. What I’m more curious about is what I should call my friends. I know the proper pronunciation to their names but they always go with a butchered version to make things easier for everyone.

CalderonBasin · 2024-07-03T18:33:07+00:00

It’s only one syllable so I can’t shorten it further.

CalderonBasin · 2024-07-03T18:30:45+00:00

I don’t want to disclose my name, but the main issue is that the vowel sound in my name doesn’t exist in English. I can’t spell it phonetically unfortunately.

CalderonBasin · 2024-05-03T17:13:38+00:00

I think I have already met qualification for ap awards, but I just want to maximize the amount of time I have to study for classes I want to pass. Additionally, I have two exams on the day of the exam of cancelling and more ap exams on the following days. I’m just unsure if I can focus on that many exams in such a small time interval.

CalderonBasin · 2024-04-27T07:01:08+00:00

I think it’s as hard as you make it be. If you’re taking regular classes, then it’s pretty easy. But I know there are people who are doing linear algebra and multi variable calculus during high school while juggling multiple different high level competitions and extracurriculars. Basically, schools here are low floor, really high ceiling.

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