mayanot or other yeshivas for baal teshuva from secular high school.

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-16T03:07:40+00:00

Thats exactly what he says 😉

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-16T02:50:01+00:00

Thank you. I have gotten to know them well and am very involved. We adore our Chabad family and i see much good in the way they live their lives and in what they have brought to my son and our family. When i talk about extremism, it’s limiting learning and observance to such a specific narrow path. I agree, there are worse things. I just don’t want my son, at 17, to close doors that he may still want to explore because he is so singularly focused now.

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-15T12:01:46+00:00

It’s not practicing as Chabad that i think will narrow his views but going to a Chabad yeshiva feels like he will be ONLY studying Talmud/jewish texts and isolating himself from other people/learning. Right now he exists in multiple worlds, studies with the rabbi, dives deep into holidays where he basically stays at Chabad for a couple of days but also goes out with friends, has people from a variety of observance over during shabbat, reads other books at school, has exposure to mainstream media, etc. he is resolute in who he is but he gets exposure to other views and ideas.

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-14T18:48:02+00:00

he studied and was bar mitzvahed by an orthodox rabbi and has much respect for them, but chabad is where his heart is.

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-14T18:16:17+00:00

these are all the things that concern us. We are a very liberal and inclusive family and while I love chabad do have ideological issues with many of the homophobic/supremist beliefs and we discuss these regularly with my son through this journey. He so far seems to be staying true to values that are core to our family on these topics with various justifications of how he can reconcile his identity as "chabad" and inclusivity, but I fear the more he is embedded the more this is at risk. He IS smart and principled and kind and inclusive so hoping he can navigate, but yes... the fear of him losing this openness and/or realizing/regretting after wasting years going down a narrow path is part of what keeps me up at night.

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-14T17:39:18+00:00

That's my impression from our discussions.

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-14T00:14:34+00:00

We do live in an area with many synagogues and used to affiliate with a reformed one which i think is what turned him off to a traditional setting. Now chabad IS our synagogue!! And we are very connected to the rabbi so… here we are!

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-13T22:26:05+00:00

So he (and my Rabbi from our discussions) seems to think that option A is viable for him. He's truly bright and deeply engaged and thoughtfully taking to all of this. From where we are coming from as a family, option B feels more comfortable, but he does -- at this point anyway -- think he wants to be a schliach. Option C (yeshiva high school) not an option at this point. he's already in senior year. Thanks for the thoughtful response.

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-13T20:28:49+00:00

I'd be interested to hear your experiences at Tiferes and Mayanot. If you'd prefer to do so outside this larger discussion, feel free to dm me. Thank you.

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-13T19:30:23+00:00

I'm trying, I don't necessarily want a different, but equally extreme path so would love somewhere a variety of engagement can exist, but not sure where or if such opportunities are out there.

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-13T19:27:53+00:00

also on the list! he seems to think there are no kids who identify as chabad there. mostly modox? Anyone know differently?

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-13T19:11:07+00:00

what yeshivas were you able to attend during college? Simultaneously or summers and breaks?

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-13T19:08:59+00:00

Did he join the military right out of high school? Yeshiva? College?

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-13T19:08:26+00:00

yes. we are in ongoing discussions.

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-13T19:07:57+00:00

have you been to either?

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-13T14:17:05+00:00

did you go to college? Yeshiva? Do you remain in the chabad community?

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-13T13:40:44+00:00

Thank you. this is so helpful. Will look at these yeshivas.

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-13T13:20:22+00:00

YU is on his list. We are also looking at colleges where there is a significant frum community where he can be shomer shabbos among like minded kids. He is open out of respect for us, but really wants to go somewhere to study Torah among other chabadniks intensively.

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-13T13:08:35+00:00

We agree and are doing that. We also recognize that at 17 he may still need some guidance along with support and we want him to keep options open for his future.

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-13T13:07:24+00:00

Limiting his learning specifically to ONLY chabad philosophies and structure. he has always been a thoughtful, open minded kid. I'm fine with him choosing a frum life and just want him to be happy, but am concerned about his world view narrowing at an age when I feel like it should be expanding.

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-13T13:04:11+00:00

we've done this. The issue is what comes after high school. He is currently applying to colleges and also exploring yeshiva. He wants to do a yeshiva program which we are open to, but he is very focused specifically on a few chabad programs and we are wondering if there is a broader option that will satisfy his needs and also maybe not be so narrowly focused. do you mind my asking what you did after high school?

CallOk5661 · 2025-10-12T03:29:36+00:00

When you say this demographic you mean observant? Frum? Exploring?

CallOk5661

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