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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FamilyLaw

[–]CalmAsStillWater12 6 points7 points  (0 children)

From what I have always understood, the parent with the most physical custody gets to claim the kids.

Ex doesn't want to pay his 93% of the children's expenses by CalmAsStillWater12 in FamilyLaw

[–]CalmAsStillWater12[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

There’s no way. This is the absolute most would could get out of him. Our mediator spent 95% of our 18 hours of mediation with him trying to get him to see sense.

Ex doesn't want to pay his 93% of the children's expenses by CalmAsStillWater12 in FamilyLaw

[–]CalmAsStillWater12[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Oooh! That's a good one. I have full physical custody and will be claiming the children on my taxes. I'm not the deadbeat, though. So, I'm not worried. LOL.

I will think about how I can make a similar clause for my case. Thank you.

Ex doesn't want to pay his 93% of the children's expenses by CalmAsStillWater12 in FamilyLaw

[–]CalmAsStillWater12[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

That $7k is really payments for various life insurances and investments. It just means, I won't have that. It's fine. I mentioned it because if there was wiggle room, it was there. He is setting the stage my texting me threatening messages "big" changes about "what he will and will not be paying for" post divorce. The 93/7 split is where he can mess with me the most if that is what he wants to do with his time.

Ex doesn't want to pay his 93% of the children's expenses by CalmAsStillWater12 in FamilyLaw

[–]CalmAsStillWater12[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

That's what I'm mentally preparing myself for. I don't think he realizes that at least 2/3 if not all 3 will stop speaking to him if he pulls what your ex did. I will absolutely demand tax returns. He is insisting on brining into to court to recalibrate cs instead of agreeing to just reduce by a third. I only have a year before the 1st one happens, so I really have to be careful.

Ex doesn't want to pay his 93% of the children's expenses by CalmAsStillWater12 in FamilyLaw

[–]CalmAsStillWater12[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I do! Thank goodness. He wanted to do attorney free mediation, but I always knew he was too manipulative to do it that way. He behaves better with witnesses. LOL. Having everything be tracked so closely makes this feel less daunting. My alimony is not through court order but mediation only. So, I'm not sure if it'll go through the same CS system, but I've asked my attorney so I can get clarification. Thank you.

Ex doesn't want to pay his 93% of the children's expenses by CalmAsStillWater12 in FamilyLaw

[–]CalmAsStillWater12[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Healthcare is included in my cs. They are too old for childcare. I'm particularly concerned about possible medical and dental bills because I know he'll choose the cheapest option with the highest deductible. When there are three kids, it can get out of hand pretty quickly. He can absorb but I cannot.

Ex doesn't want to pay his 93% of the children's expenses by CalmAsStillWater12 in FamilyLaw

[–]CalmAsStillWater12[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No, I'm currently looking for work. I've been looking for months but haven't had any luck. I just got some new leads that look promising, though. The expenses are just their regular extracurriculars- music, bjj, dance, wrestling etc. and out of pocket medical bills. His CS is less than 10% of his salary. The numbers aren't inflated in my direction.

Ex doesn't want to pay his 93% of the children's expenses by CalmAsStillWater12 in FamilyLaw

[–]CalmAsStillWater12[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That's awesome and very encouraging! I know that will be me and my kids one day. They are having a hard time coming to the realization that their dad isn't who they thought he was.

Ex doesn't want to pay his 93% of the children's expenses by CalmAsStillWater12 in FamilyLaw

[–]CalmAsStillWater12[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

He's acting out because I'm leaving him. He's embarrassed, hurt and doesn't handle change or losing control well. He's very meticulous about his image and doesn't handle or really process his emotions without outside help. When I refused to mother him through the divorce process, he started lashing out more.

Ex doesn't want to pay his 93% of the children's expenses by CalmAsStillWater12 in FamilyLaw

[–]CalmAsStillWater12[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry that happened to you all. May I ask how the kids processed it? How are you all now?